I heard that the deceased is punished in his grave because of the wailing of his family over him. I hope you will clarify this meaning?
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Question:
I heard that the deceased is punished in his grave because of the wailing of his brother over him. Please clarify this meaning. May Allah reward you with good.
Answer:
Yes, there are hadiths stating that the deceased is punished for the wailing over him, along with the saying of Allah the Exalted:[An-Najm 53:39] But it is except for what you used to do. The scholars have differed on how to reconcile these texts. Some scholars said that the punishment for the wailing over him, or for what was wailed over him, applies if he had willed it before his death, meaning he willed that people wail over him and tear their sleeves. In that case, he is punished for it because he was pleased with this matter before his death. As the poet said: "When I die, wail over me with what I deserve, so that the wailing remains upon me, O mother of Ma'dan."
Such a person is punished because he willed it before his death, so he is pleased with it, and the hadiths are understood to apply to the one who willed it. Other scholars hold that the meaning of "punished for the wailing of his family" or "for what was wailed over him" is that he is grieved by it; that he suffers in his grave because of it. This is the meaning of the punishment: he learns all of this. The truth is that it is obligatory to keep the texts on their apparent meaning, that he is punished for what was wailed over him. Therefore, one should prevent wailing over the dead and prevent presenting debts to the dead, because they are afflicted with punishment from it while they are in their graves. The wailers think that this is a form of honoring them and showing their status and the impact of their loss, and that the one over whom no one wails has no value. They say this to them, and the deceased is hurt by it. But they are mistaken in that, and the deceased is harmed by this act because it is a sin. If the relatives of the deceased know this, they will refrain from wailing, and this will be a form of compassion for them and preventing them from this act. Yes.
I heard that the deceased is punished in his grave because of the wailing of his brother over him. Please clarify this meaning. May Allah reward you with good.
Answer:
Yes, there are hadiths stating that the deceased is punished for the wailing over him, along with the saying of Allah the Exalted:
And that there is not for man except that [good] for which he strives
وَأَن لَّيْسَ لِلْإِنسَانِ إِلَّا مَا سَعَىٰSuch a person is punished because he willed it before his death, so he is pleased with it, and the hadiths are understood to apply to the one who willed it. Other scholars hold that the meaning of "punished for the wailing of his family" or "for what was wailed over him" is that he is grieved by it; that he suffers in his grave because of it. This is the meaning of the punishment: he learns all of this. The truth is that it is obligatory to keep the texts on their apparent meaning, that he is punished for what was wailed over him. Therefore, one should prevent wailing over the dead and prevent presenting debts to the dead, because they are afflicted with punishment from it while they are in their graves. The wailers think that this is a form of honoring them and showing their status and the impact of their loss, and that the one over whom no one wails has no value. They say this to them, and the deceased is hurt by it. But they are mistaken in that, and the deceased is harmed by this act because it is a sin. If the relatives of the deceased know this, they will refrain from wailing, and this will be a form of compassion for them and preventing them from this act. Yes.
Source
قناة «العلامة الدكتور صالح الفوزان»، سمعت بأن الميت يعذب ببكاء أهله عليه في قبره أرجو توضيح هذا المعنى؟ الشيخ صالح بن فوزان الفوزان — youtube.com
The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.