Is it permissible to ask one’s parents for forgiveness for the undutifulness we committed toward them during their lifetimes, or after their deaths?

The questioner:
He says: Honorable Shaykh, may Allah grant you success, is it permissible to ask one’s parents for forgiveness with the intention that they pardon us for our mistakes in being undutiful to them, during their lifetimes and after their deaths?

The Shaykh:
The deceased, meaning after their death.

The questioner:
During their lifetimes and after their deaths.

The Shaykh:
During their lifetimes, there is nothing wrong with it. You say, “Forgive me for the mistake and undutifulness I committed against you.” As for asking them for forgiveness so that they forgive you, that is different. Meaning, they forgive you for your mistake against them; they pardon you for what you did wrong in their regard. This is permissible. Or you ask them to seek forgiveness from Allah for you; you ask them for forgiveness in the sense that they ask Allah to forgive you and seek forgiveness for you. This is permissible. But asking them to forgive you for your sins is not allowed. They can only forgive you for the sins between you and them, specifically the mistakes you made against them. Yes.

The questioner:
The Shaykh says: During their lifetimes and after their deaths.

The Shaykh:
After their deaths, you do not ask them for anything, but you seek forgiveness for them. You seek forgiveness for them, for they are unable to seek forgiveness or pardon you while they are dead. They do not hear you, and you have no connection with them. So you seek forgiveness for them and make du'a' for them. Yes.