Concealing the payment of the customary gift at celebrations
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
Question:
The questioner, Umm Muhammad, says: We have a custom, which is called al-Rafdah and al-Rift in some regions, and in our area it is called Nashr. They bring a tray, and each woman puts money in it for the groom’s mother. If she does not pay, either due to her circumstances or for another reason, she does not escape the talk of the women. She says: I am afraid of showing off (riya'). If I want to pay, I give it to the groom’s mother without anyone seeing me. Is this custom permissible?
Answer:
There is no harm in that if you pay with the people, so that it is not said about you that you are stingy or something similar. It is better for you and more concealed for you if you pay with the people. Yes.
The questioner, Umm Muhammad, says: We have a custom, which is called al-Rafdah and al-Rift in some regions, and in our area it is called Nashr. They bring a tray, and each woman puts money in it for the groom’s mother. If she does not pay, either due to her circumstances or for another reason, she does not escape the talk of the women. She says: I am afraid of showing off (riya'). If I want to pay, I give it to the groom’s mother without anyone seeing me. Is this custom permissible?
Answer:
There is no harm in that if you pay with the people, so that it is not said about you that you are stingy or something similar. It is better for you and more concealed for you if you pay with the people. Yes.
Source
نور على الدرب - الفوزان - 03/063 — archive.org (8:14)
The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.