Advice to parents regarding separation and conflict between them
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
Question:
This is Umm Muhammad asking a question. She says: Honorable Shaykh, I have a problem that exists between my parents and recurs every year. My father is seventy years old; he does not speak to my mother, nor does he greet her, and he does not even stay in the same room with her for a period ranging from three to four months. In both cases, it is my father who initiates the dispute and the boycott over trivial reasons. This situation has recurred every year during these recent years. I should mention that my mother tries to speak to him and be gentle with him, but he refuses and claims that my mother is the cause. What do you advise the parents? May Allah reward you.
Answer:
We advise the parents to have good relations with one another[At-Tawbah 9:71] [Al-Baqarah 2:228], because we advise each of them to treat the other with good conduct in accordance with their marital bond. If the father has a harsh temperament, is prone to anger, or is hasty, he should be lenient and not provoke her. The mother likewise should be considerate of his condition, not provoke him, and not anger him as much as she is able. In summary, you must be patient with what you or the mother receive from this father, such as separation, anger, and the like. You must be patient. Yes.
The presenter:
May Allah reward you.
This is Umm Muhammad asking a question. She says: Honorable Shaykh, I have a problem that exists between my parents and recurs every year. My father is seventy years old; he does not speak to my mother, nor does he greet her, and he does not even stay in the same room with her for a period ranging from three to four months. In both cases, it is my father who initiates the dispute and the boycott over trivial reasons. This situation has recurred every year during these recent years. I should mention that my mother tries to speak to him and be gentle with him, but he refuses and claims that my mother is the cause. What do you advise the parents? May Allah reward you.
Answer:
We advise the parents to have good relations with one another
of one another. They enjoin what is right
بَعْضٍ يَأْمُرُونَ بِالْمَعْرُوفِAnd due to the wives is similar to what is expected of them, according to what is reasonable
وَلَهُنَّ مِثْلُ الَّذِي عَلَيْهِنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِThe presenter:
May Allah reward you.
Source
نور على الدرب - الفوزان - 03/227 — archive.org (2:42)
The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.