The ruling on a wife saying to her husband: “You are to me like my father”
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Question:
Honorable Shaykh, a wife said to her husband, “You are to me like my father,” intending that it should be forbidden for him to have intercourse with her. Then she regretted it. What is required of her? Is this zihar?
Answer:
There is scholarly disagreement on this. Some hold that it is oppression (idhtihad), and she owes the expiation for oppression. Others hold that she owes the expiation for an oath: feeding ten poor people, clothing them, or freeing a slave; if she cannot find any of these, then it is a dispute that does not result in a specific penalty. Others hold that there is nothing on her, because the ruling regarding harm applies specifically to men, and there is nothing on the woman. There are three opinions, and the correct one is the middle position: she owes the expiation for an oath because she made her husband forbidden to her. Making what is lawful forbidden entails the expiation for an oath. This is the middle opinion.
Honorable Shaykh, a wife said to her husband, “You are to me like my father,” intending that it should be forbidden for him to have intercourse with her. Then she regretted it. What is required of her? Is this zihar?
Answer:
There is scholarly disagreement on this. Some hold that it is oppression (idhtihad), and she owes the expiation for oppression. Others hold that she owes the expiation for an oath: feeding ten poor people, clothing them, or freeing a slave; if she cannot find any of these, then it is a dispute that does not result in a specific penalty. Others hold that there is nothing on her, because the ruling regarding harm applies specifically to men, and there is nothing on the woman. There are three opinions, and the correct one is the middle position: she owes the expiation for an oath because she made her husband forbidden to her. Making what is lawful forbidden entails the expiation for an oath. This is the middle opinion.
Source
شرح بلوغ المرام من أدلة الأحكام [ صالح الفوزان ]، باب الرجعة، وباب الإيلاء والظهار والكفارة — islamhouse.com (57:29)
The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.