His wife refuses to wear the hijab because her mother told her to, so what is your guidance for him?
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The questioner:
He informs you that he is a young man of twenty-three years, married, praise be to Allah, and committed to the Shari'ah, but his wife does not accept wearing the hijab, saying that her mother is the one who told her not to wear the hijab. What do you advise me to do? May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh:
I advise you that it is obligatory for you to compel your wife to wear the hijab, because this is a religious obligation, and abandoning the hijab is a sin. It is not permissible for you to be lenient in abandoning this obligation. Her saying that her mother ordered her to do so is not something in which obedience is permissible, due to the saying of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him). Obedience to a created being is not permissible, neither to the father nor to anyone else, if he orders a sin. Abandoning the hijab is a sin, and no one is to be obeyed in it; rather, Allah (Glorified and Exalted is He) is to be obeyed. It is obligatory for you to compel her to wear the hijab and to take hold of her hand, but let all of this be through the path of wisdom and admonition. If she stops, that is better. If she does not stop, then it is necessary to compel her to do so, or to separate from her if she persists in it.
The presenter:
May Allah reward you with good,
The questioner:
He also has other observations about this wife. He says that Shaykh Salih stated that she also makes some mistakes and does some actions, which may be shirk (associating partners with Allah). If he advises her, she says that her mother told her to do so. He says she is like this from her home, without his permission. He asked her where she goes, and she said she goes to her mother's house, which is four kilometers from us. What is Shaykh Salih's opinion about this house? Also, it is not permissible for her to leave her husband's house except with his permission.
The Shaykh:
Because obeying her husband is obligatory upon her, it is not permissible for her to go out without his permission, whether to visit her mother or for any other reason. As for the fact that she commits some violations and says, "My mother does the same," or "My mother ordered me to do it," as we mentioned, it is not permissible to obey a creation in disobedience to the Creator. This is especially so since you mentioned that she does things that are forms of shirk (associating partners with Allah). This is a great danger. If this act she performs is major shirk, it takes her out of the religion and corrupts her creed. If it is minor shirk, it diminishes the creed and is a means to major shirk. It is obligatory that it is not permissible to obey a creation in disobedience to the Creator. Allah the Exalted said:[Luqman 31:14], and He said to him: [Luqman 31:14-15]. So do not obey them in that which you have no knowledge of. If her mother orders her to associate partners with Allah, she does not obey her. Likewise, if she orders her to do [something else], she does not obey her, because there is no obedience to a creation in disobedience to the Creator.
He informs you that he is a young man of twenty-three years, married, praise be to Allah, and committed to the Shari'ah, but his wife does not accept wearing the hijab, saying that her mother is the one who told her not to wear the hijab. What do you advise me to do? May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh:
I advise you that it is obligatory for you to compel your wife to wear the hijab, because this is a religious obligation, and abandoning the hijab is a sin. It is not permissible for you to be lenient in abandoning this obligation. Her saying that her mother ordered her to do so is not something in which obedience is permissible, due to the saying of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him)
There is no obedience to a created being in disobedience to the Creator,
لا طاعة لمخلوق بمعصية الخالق،The presenter:
May Allah reward you with good,
The questioner:
He also has other observations about this wife. He says that Shaykh Salih stated that she also makes some mistakes and does some actions, which may be shirk (associating partners with Allah). If he advises her, she says that her mother told her to do so. He says she is like this from her home, without his permission. He asked her where she goes, and she said she goes to her mother's house, which is four kilometers from us. What is Shaykh Salih's opinion about this house? Also, it is not permissible for her to leave her husband's house except with his permission.
The Shaykh:
Because obeying her husband is obligatory upon her, it is not permissible for her to go out without his permission, whether to visit her mother or for any other reason. As for the fact that she commits some violations and says, "My mother does the same," or "My mother ordered me to do it," as we mentioned, it is not permissible to obey a creation in disobedience to the Creator. This is especially so since you mentioned that she does things that are forms of shirk (associating partners with Allah). This is a great danger. If this act she performs is major shirk, it takes her out of the religion and corrupts her creed. If it is minor shirk, it diminishes the creed and is a means to major shirk. It is obligatory that it is not permissible to obey a creation in disobedience to the Creator. Allah the Exalted said:
man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness
الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ(14) And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination. (15) But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.
فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ وَإِن جَاهَدَاكَ عَلَىٰ أَن تُشْرِكَ
Source
قناة «العلامة الدكتور صالح الفوزان»، زوجته لا تقبل لبس الحجاب لأن والدتها قالت لها ذلك فما توجيهكم له؟ الشيخ صالح بن فوزان الفوزان — youtube.com
The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.