What is the ruling on using hitting as a means in raising children?

Question:
May Allah reward you. This is a woman asking. She says: I am a married woman and I have five children, the oldest is thirteen and the youngest is four. I have raised them since they were very young and I have striven in their upbringing, yet I have not succeeded with them. They are lazy in their prayers and in their religious and worldly duties. Although I am the only one who commands them and forbids them, without their father; he rarely commands them or forbids them. For this reason, my nerves get frayed with them and I hit them hard, then after this I return and regret my hitting. So I hope you will guide us. May Allah reward you with good.

Answer:
We guide you to patience, seeking reward, and continuing to command them and emphasize prayer upon them. This requires patience and requires persistence. You are on reward, if Allah wills. It is obligatory for their father to participate in commanding them, forbidding them, and raising them. He is the primary responsible party; the father is the primary responsible party. So it is not permissible for him to leave his duty. But if he leaves his duty, you do not leave your duty. May Allah reward you with good. Continue and do not despair, and you are on reward, if Allah wills.