Who is the one who knows whether a boy has reached the age of discernment regarding the private parts of women or not?

The questioner: So, regarding the issue of , to whom does the estimation refer?

The Shaykh : A second discussion, may Allah guide you. This is a second question.

The questioner : This question, this question, who are the ones who...

The Shaykh : This is a second question.

The questioner : Who is the one who determines?

The Shaykh : Let us finish the first discussion and move on to this one.

The questioner : We have finished it. Who is the one who determines?

The Shaykh : What did we conclude?

The questioner : We concluded, let us not determine, we did not want to determine it by age.

The Shaykh : The people of the house, what is the name of those who need it?

The questioner : No, that is not the case.

The Shaykh : The father of the boy, the guardian of the boy, and so on, he is the one who needs to determine.
The student : It is not the case that, by Allah, my son, my wife is sitting without a hijab, and a thirteen-year-old boy enters on her. I do not accept this, I do not accept it, because in my opinion, this is an adolescent and he has started to desire women, even in my estimation.

The Shaykh : Oh, what, what? The matter does not need heat, it needs calm, and it needs...
The student : ... Okay, fine.

The Shaykh : My brother, you have the freedom not to let the child, the one who is five years old, enter, right or not?
The student: Yes.

The Shaykh: When there is doubt in your mind about a child, meaning he has been seen exposing the private parts of women, that is enough; do not let him enter. That is not the problem. The problem is not between you and, say, your wife, your sister, or your daughter. The problem concerns society. What is the system? Unless they expose the private parts of women, who knows whether he has done so or not? It is not you, so-and-so, or so-and-so. I am the one who knows. I am my son's father, and she is his mother; she is the one who knows, and so on. So if every society adheres to the rulings... in that case, what does each person do? We implement the ruling of the Shari'ah. I know my son has exposed the private parts of women, and he is eight years old; I do not allow him to enter. I know my son is eleven, a man who is impotent and insane, and so on. I do not say, "He has reached the age of ten" or "He has reached the age of eleven," or anything like that.

The questioner : ... May Allah reward you with good. You said if, for example, the society is holding fast to this matter, but now the issue has been lost between ignorance and little religion.

The Shaykh : My brother, give us, may Allah bless you, give us the answer. Do not allow anyone to enter, absolutely. Who is telling you that you must...

The questioner : I... my wife is visiting.

The Shaykh : Who is telling you?!

The questioner : So practically, I have to prevent my wife from removing the hijab. She removed her hijab, or she uncovered her head.

The Shaykh : My brother, you are confused, confused. The issue is not here. The issue is whether it is permissible for a man who has a son to allow him to enter upon a woman when he has not reached the age of discernment regarding the private parts of women, or not. You cannot judge the children of people. You judge your son. That is the issue. But by Allah, if you do not want it, fine. If you do not want it, who is forcing you that the so-and-so boy enters upon your daughter, upon your wife... This is a ruling...
The student: Peace be upon you.

The Shaykh : And upon you be peace, and the mercy of Allah and His blessings.