Is it permissible for an unmarried virgin woman who has no guardian, or whose guardian is absent, to marry herself, or not?
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The questioner : Is it permissible for an unmarried virgin woman who has no guardian, or whose guardian is absent, to marry herself, or not? And is there a difference in this ruling between a virgin and a woman who has previously been married, whether she is divorced or a widow?
The Shaykh : It is not permissible for a woman to marry herself.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Nor is it permissible for any other woman, whether she is a virgin or has previously been married. This is because Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, placed the marriage contract in the hands of someone other than the woman. He said:[Al-Baqarah 2:221]. Regarding men, He said: [Al-Baqarah 2:221], attributing the marriage to the husband himself. As for women, He said: [Al-Baqarah 2:221], placing the marriage in the hands of someone other than the woman. And He, Glorified and Exalted is He, said: [Al-Baqarah 2:232]. And because of the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him): Sunan Ibn Majah 1880Sahih (Darussalam).
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : This is the evidence from the reports that a woman must have a guardian who marries her. As for the reasoning, the woman is deficient in intellect and religion; she is limited in her thinking and weak in her religion.
I say this based on the saying of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him):Sahih al-Bukhari 304, and His saying, the Exalted: [An-Nisa 4:34]. If it were not for the woman's deficiency, the man would not be the maintainer over her. In fact, the explicit meaning of the verse is: [An-Nisa 4:34]. If the woman is described in this way by the indication of the Book and the Sunnah, regarding the deficiency in intellect and religion, then she needs a guiding guardian who knows the suitable match, knows the interests of the marriage, and knows who the woman will be with, so that he may proceed to marry her off or refrain. For this reason, a woman must have a guardian who marries her off according to the conditions known among the scholars of knowledge.
A woman does not marry herself, whether she is a virgin or has previously been married. However, there is a matter here that requires attention: it is necessary to have the woman's permission and consent, whether she is a virgin or has previously been married, and whether the one marrying her off is her father or someone else. The stronger opinion is that it is not permissible for a person to marry off his daughter or any other woman until she consents to that husband and gives permission. However, if she is a virgin, her silence is sufficient as permission, though if she explicitly states her consent, that is more complete, but silence is sufficient.
If she has previously been married, she must explicitly state her consent, saying, "Yes, I am pleased with this husband." It is obligatory for the guardian, whether he is the father or someone else, to specify the suitor for the woman in a way that leads to knowledge of him. He should not say, "Do you like me to marry you to so-and-so?" without explaining the man's condition and attributes. Just as the man wants from the woman what he wants in terms of beauty and good character, so the woman wants from the man what the man wants from her in terms of beauty and good character. Therefore, the man must explain to the woman being asked for permission in a way that leads to knowledge. Generalities do not achieve the intended purpose.
Yes, if the woman fully trusts her guardian and is satisfied with what he sees, and she says to him, for example, "Are you satisfied with this husband in terms of religion and character?" then this would be sufficient if she trusts him and is pleased with what he has chosen for her.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : It is not permissible for a woman to marry herself.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Nor is it permissible for any other woman, whether she is a virgin or has previously been married. This is because Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, placed the marriage contract in the hands of someone other than the woman. He said:
And do not marry polytheistic women
وَلا تَنْكِحُوا الْمُشْرِكَاتِAnd do not marry polytheistic men
وَلا تُنْكِحُوا الْمُشْرِكِينَAnd do not marry polytheistic men [to your women] until they believe
ولا تُنكحوا المشركين حتى يؤمنواdo not prevent them from remarrying their [former] husbands if they agree among themselves on an acceptable basis
فَلا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَنْ يَنْكِحْنَ أَزْوَاجَهُنَّ إِذَا تَرَاضَوْا بَيْنَهُمْ بِالْمَعْرُوفِThere is no marriage except with a guardian.
لا نكاح إلا بوليThe questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : This is the evidence from the reports that a woman must have a guardian who marries her. As for the reasoning, the woman is deficient in intellect and religion; she is limited in her thinking and weak in her religion.
I say this based on the saying of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him):
I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religion than you. A cautious sensible man could be led astray by some of you.
ما رأيت من ناقصات عقل ودين أذهب للُب الرجل الحازم من إحداكنMen are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth.
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَى بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنْفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ[right of] what Allah has given one over the other
بما فضّل الله بعضهم على بعضA woman does not marry herself, whether she is a virgin or has previously been married. However, there is a matter here that requires attention: it is necessary to have the woman's permission and consent, whether she is a virgin or has previously been married, and whether the one marrying her off is her father or someone else. The stronger opinion is that it is not permissible for a person to marry off his daughter or any other woman until she consents to that husband and gives permission. However, if she is a virgin, her silence is sufficient as permission, though if she explicitly states her consent, that is more complete, but silence is sufficient.
If she has previously been married, she must explicitly state her consent, saying, "Yes, I am pleased with this husband." It is obligatory for the guardian, whether he is the father or someone else, to specify the suitor for the woman in a way that leads to knowledge of him. He should not say, "Do you like me to marry you to so-and-so?" without explaining the man's condition and attributes. Just as the man wants from the woman what he wants in terms of beauty and good character, so the woman wants from the man what the man wants from her in terms of beauty and good character. Therefore, the man must explain to the woman being asked for permission in a way that leads to knowledge. Generalities do not achieve the intended purpose.
Yes, if the woman fully trusts her guardian and is satisfied with what he sees, and she says to him, for example, "Are you satisfied with this husband in terms of religion and character?" then this would be sufficient if she trusts him and is pleased with what he has chosen for her.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.