The Difference Between Forbidden Backbiting and Complaining to Seek One's Right

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Question:
Between forbidden backbiting and backbiting

Answer:
Backbiting. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

Backbiting is mentioning your brother in a way that he would dislike

الغيبة لذكر أخاك بما يكره

. Allah (Exalted and Majestic is He) said:

or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead?

وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا

[Al-Hujurat 49:12]

so you would detest it.
As for backbiting, which in this context means complaining to the one in authority to seek one's right from him, or a woman complaining about her husband to the judge so that he will be just with her regarding her husband, this is not backbiting; this is seeking one's right.
For this reason, Hind bint 'Utbah, the wife of Abu Sufyan, came to the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyan is a stingy man who does not give me and my children what is sufficient in a good manner. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

Take what is sufficient for you and your child, on a reasonable basis.

خذي ما يكفيك وولدك بالمعروف

Sunan Ibn Majah 2293Sahih (Darussalam)

. She said: He is stingy. And the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) did not rebuke her because she was demanding her right. She was demanding her right. Her intention was not backbiting; rather, her intention was that she was demanding it. Yes.

Source قناة «العلامة الدكتور صالح الفوزان»، محاضرات في العقيدة والدعوة-094-موقف الإسلام من التيارات الفكرية|صالح الفوزان|كبار العلماء — youtube.com (56:24)

The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.

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