What is the ruling on sitting with men whose conversation is mostly backbiting, talebearing, cursing, and insults?
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The questioner:
He says: I sit in a gathering with many men, especially the elderly, and they speak in foul language, using insults, backbiting, and talebearing. When I advise them and explain the ruling on this, they do not care about my words, and perhaps they do not listen to what I say. They make excuses by saying, "What are we supposed to say? How are we supposed to talk? What is left for us to talk about?" So, is there a sin on me for sitting with them, such that I become one of those who listened to them and am like them? What should I do? Please give us a ruling, and may Allah reward you.
The Shaykh:
It is obligatory that the gatherings of Muslims be free from foul language and forbidden speech. There are many types of permissible speech, such as talking about their worldly affairs, past news, or similar matters, or reading from a book and listening. Praise be to Allah, there is plenty of room for conversation other than forbidden speech. As for the one who persists in forbidden speech in his gathering, he must be advised and the wrong must be denied to him. If he does not comply, it is obligatory to leave that gathering, so that one does not become a partner in sin with them. It is not sufficient to deny it to them the first time or the second time and then sit and say, "I denied it to them"; that is not enough. If he sees that they do not accept the advice and continue in forbidden speech, he should isolate himself from their gathering and save himself. Yes.
The questioner:
Perhaps the Honorable Shaykh can address this excuse that some of the common people spread, which is: if talking about so-and-so is forbidden and talking is forbidden, then who do we talk to? Is there a clarification for this?
The Shaykh:
They talk about permissible matters from their religious affairs and their worldly affairs. They talk about permissible matters, and the areas for conversation are many.
The questioner:
Backbiting is only one of those areas, and the rest is all other than backbiting.
The Shaykh:
Yes, backbiting and forbidden speech, all of this is prohibited. It is not permissible for a Muslim to occupy himself and his gathering with it. Yes.
He says: I sit in a gathering with many men, especially the elderly, and they speak in foul language, using insults, backbiting, and talebearing. When I advise them and explain the ruling on this, they do not care about my words, and perhaps they do not listen to what I say. They make excuses by saying, "What are we supposed to say? How are we supposed to talk? What is left for us to talk about?" So, is there a sin on me for sitting with them, such that I become one of those who listened to them and am like them? What should I do? Please give us a ruling, and may Allah reward you.
The Shaykh:
It is obligatory that the gatherings of Muslims be free from foul language and forbidden speech. There are many types of permissible speech, such as talking about their worldly affairs, past news, or similar matters, or reading from a book and listening. Praise be to Allah, there is plenty of room for conversation other than forbidden speech. As for the one who persists in forbidden speech in his gathering, he must be advised and the wrong must be denied to him. If he does not comply, it is obligatory to leave that gathering, so that one does not become a partner in sin with them. It is not sufficient to deny it to them the first time or the second time and then sit and say, "I denied it to them"; that is not enough. If he sees that they do not accept the advice and continue in forbidden speech, he should isolate himself from their gathering and save himself. Yes.
The questioner:
Perhaps the Honorable Shaykh can address this excuse that some of the common people spread, which is: if talking about so-and-so is forbidden and talking is forbidden, then who do we talk to? Is there a clarification for this?
The Shaykh:
They talk about permissible matters from their religious affairs and their worldly affairs. They talk about permissible matters, and the areas for conversation are many.
The questioner:
Backbiting is only one of those areas, and the rest is all other than backbiting.
The Shaykh:
Yes, backbiting and forbidden speech, all of this is prohibited. It is not permissible for a Muslim to occupy himself and his gathering with it. Yes.
Source
قناة «العلامة الدكتور صالح الفوزان»، ما حكم الجلوس مع رجال أغلب حديثهم الغيبة والنميمة والسب والشتم؟ الشيخ صالح بن فوزان الفوزان — youtube.com
The Arabic text is a machine transcription of the audio recording.