What are the limits of a man’s intimacy with his wife during the daytime of Ramadan?

The questioner : The second line of the question is: What are the limits of a man’s intimacy with his wife during the day in Ramadan? And is it permissible to go beyond a kiss?

The Shaykh : A man in Ramadan is not permitted to use with his wife anything that would lead to his ejaculation. People differ greatly in this regard. Some are slow and can control themselves, as Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said about the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him): “He was the most master of his desires.” Others cannot control themselves and ejaculate quickly. The latter type must be cautious about caressing his wife or touching her with a kiss or otherwise. If a person knows that he can control himself, then he may kiss and embrace. However, he must avoid intercourse. Interference is forbidden, as we mentioned in a previous session. Four matters follow from it if you are aware of them. The first is sin. The second is the obligation to abstain for the rest of the day. One cannot say, “I have broken my fast, so I will eat and drink.” Because anyone who breaks his fast without a valid religious excuse must abstain. Yes. And he must make up that day. This is a rule, so take it, O student of knowledge. Anyone who breaks his fast...

The questioner : What is it?

The Shaykh : ...without a valid religious excuse, it is obligatory for him to abstain and make up the fast. But if he broke it for a valid religious excuse, such as saving a drowning person or a fire, and he was forced to eat and drink to save them, and he said, “I will eat and drink for the rest of the day,” we say, “No, that is not possible.” He says, “Eat and drink,” because you have caused harm for a valid reason. The third matter that follows from a man who has intercourse with his wife during the daytime of Ramadan while fasting is making up the fast. We mentioned making up the fast. Yes. Look at the making up of the fast in Ramadan, because it is one of the acts of worship, so it is obligatory for him to make it up. The fourth matter is the expiation. It is the majority of the jurists. Wait a moment. This. If he does not find it, then fasting two consecutive months. Yes. If he is unable...

The questioner : ...he feeds a poor person. Is there no obedience in the expiation?

The Shaykh : Yes, yes, what is it? What is it? The expiation of purity, the expiation of purity. It is obligatory for you to feed, and this is the testimony. These three matters are in order and not optional. Yes. Compound. Okay. He believes. If he does not find it, he fasts two consecutive months. If he is unable. No. It is feeding a poor person. Hmm. But if this hadith came to us. Yes. The one who came with his wife. And he said, “I will come, I will read.” But he did not know that these expiations follow from it. If he had known that this expiation followed from it, he would have left the country until Ramadan ended. If he said to us, “Can you open the door to Allah?”
O our brothers, we mentioned a rule: the ignorant person is in a state of difficulty. Hmm? We say this is not ready. This is ignorance of what follows from his action, not ignorance of the ruling of his action. That is, he knows what is forbidden from what is not forbidden. For this reason, the Bedouin who committed these acts. Look at this. This is truly, truly. He came to the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) to ask what follows from his action? Did he promise him what follows? He arranged it, not just a scholar, not a scholar. It is not obligatory unless you are aware. Aware of the place of the foot. He is aware of the prohibition, and for this reason he says, “I am ruined.” But he is not aware of what follows from his intercourse, and for this reason he says, “What have I done?” And by this we know. Or we direct this questioner who said to us. We. If I had known that the expiation was upon me, I would not have had intercourse. What do we say to him? Upon you. We say, “The expiation is upon you, even if you did not know that this matter is obligatory.”
And the parallel to that is if a man commits zina, and I seek refuge in Allah. And he says he knows that the religion is forbidden. But he did not know that the punishment for zina is stoning if he is a married man. Is he stoned or not? He is stoned, he is stoned, because he knew the prohibition, and it is not required that the person of obligation know what follows from his action. Yes. Of the punishment. With approval. As long as he knows that it is forbidden. Forbidden. Then he has violated the limits of Allah the Exalted. So it is obligatory for him to do more than that, which is. And it is. The expiation and the punishment.
But there is a question, O brothers. A man was with his wife on a journey, and they were both fasting. And they were sitting, and one of them desired the other, and he had intercourse with her. Do you have thoughts? Welcome. No, no. No burden on you. No sin. Yes. And no person. Upon him the amount, upon him the amount, yes.
This is the one who had intercourse with his wife while traveling, and they were both fasting. There is no sin on him. And no expiation on him. And no abstention on you. He makes up the fast and makes it up. But. Upon him the amount. Upon him the decision. Because Allah permitted the traveler to travel. So He said . So a number of days. Come, my brother, come.