Is it permissible for me to take from my son’s money without his knowledge, knowing that I will inform him after I have taken it?

The questioner:
My son works but does not give me anything, so I am forced to take from his pocket without his knowledge. Is that permissible or not? And what sin is upon me if it is not permissible, knowing that I tell him that I took such-and-such from his pocket after I have taken it? May Allah reward you with good.

The Shaykh:
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds. May Allah send prayers and blessings upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions. After that:
For it is beyond doubt that the right of the parents over their child is a right that Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, has emphasized in the clear text of His Book, and the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) has emphasized it in his noble Sunnah. Allah the Exalted said: ... ... He, Glorified and Exalted is He, said: ... The Describer said: Allah the Exalted said: ... and so on, of the verses indicating the emphasis of the right of the parents over their child. Moreover, the mother’s right in her own right is more emphasized than the father’s right, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) commanded dutifulness to her three times, and commanded dutifulness to the father only once. This is because of what she endures of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, upbringing, and her great compassion for her child. Therefore, Allah has made it obligatory for the child to be dutiful to his parents. Among the dutifulness and kindness to them is spending on them, fulfilling their needs, and obeying them in what is good, provided they do not command disobedience. As for what the questioner mentioned, that she takes from her son’s pocket without his knowledge because he does not give her what she needs, the truth is that this is a shortcoming on the part of the son. She has the right to take from her son’s wealth. Indeed, the parents have the right to take from their child’s wealth what does not harm him and what he does not need, based on his saying: ... He (peace and blessings be upon him) said: ... So what is wrong with her taking from her son’s pocket what she needs, even if he did not give her permission? Because it is his property, and his earnings are her property. Yes.

The presenter:
May Allah reward you with good and do you good. Shaykh Salih used to say that a son like this must check on his mother’s condition to fulfill her needs.

The Shaykh:
Yes, this is obligatory: that he not put her in a position where she has to take from his pocket or take from his money secretly. Rather, he must fulfill her needs and check on her needs without her having to resort to such a thing. Yes.