Clarification of some issues regarding funerals, along with the conditions for good deeds reaching the deceased.

The Shaykh : A father who was unable to perform Hajj for a legitimate religious reason, for example, a poor man who has no funds, or not poor but sick, or unable to perform Hajj for some other reason—there are many reasons. If this father dies, it is obligatory for the son to perform Hajj on his behalf in this manner. However, in the first case, it is not obligatory. But this son, or rather the first father who was able to perform Hajj but did not, can still perform a voluntary Hajj. The obligatory Hajj will be a burden on the father, because our Lord said: . He did not purify himself, nor did he leave his work and worldly life for the Hereafter to perform Hajj to the House of Allah, because he was able to do so financially, in health, and in safety, and so on. He failed the test. But the righteous son can send him gifts from beyond the material world through his righteous deeds. These will be good deeds recorded for him, but these good deeds do not expiate the obligatory acts in which he fell short.
So now the person has died, we prayed the funeral prayer for him, we supplicated for him with what came in the Shari'ah, and we went to bury him. We buried him, and for us, with this deceased, the situation is very brief. But regarding the *ta'leem* (instruction), do you know what *ta'leem* is? If he comes to you and asks you: Who is your Lord? You say: Such and such. This is like instructing a failing student who did not... pass the exam. This harms him more than it benefits him. This *ta'leem* is a religious innovation in Islam with no basis whatsoever. But what is in the authentic Sunnah? The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) buried some of his Companions, and he said to those sitting around the grave who participated in the burial: . So each of the present ones says: O Allah... O Allah, make him firm with Your firm word. And that is enough. We throw the dirt, either from the digger or from the group of mourners. And from the Sunnah, one takes three handfuls of dirt and throws them like this, so that the one doing the throwing remembers his own fate. Then they return to their homes as if there was no deceased. We do not open a door for condolences, we do not open a house for condolences, we do not sit day and night to receive the condolers; as if no one died. Of course, we grieve, and this grief is a natural matter; because the Master of all mankind, when his son Ibrahim (peace be upon him) died, said: .
This grief is natural, but exaggerating in grief, like any exaggeration in Islam, is hateful and detested; as he (peace and blessings be upon him) said in the authentic hadith: . My father died, we prayed the funeral prayer for him in the prescribed manner, we buried him in the prescribed manner, we asked for forgiveness and firmness for him; that is it, we returned to our home as if our father was not with us. Meaning, I have a job, I continue in my job, I have a profession, I work in it. I do not sit and lock my shop and my work just to sit for three days of condolences. This is from the innovations. And as came in "Sunan Ibn Majah" from Jarir ibn Abdullah al-Bajali (may Allah be pleased with him), he said: . So there is no special gathering. If you see someone you knew who died and was dear to you in the mosque, you offer condolences, and your duty with him is finished. It is not that you go to see him in the mosque, or in the market, or in his place, or you go to his house day and night, there is no objection to that. But if he designates either his house or his neighbor's house, spacious, and so on, all of this is an intrusion into Islam, and it is something that hinders the interests of the Muslims without any religious benefit worth mentioning at all.
So the one who died, we prayed the funeral prayer, we buried him, we supplicated for him, and we returned, that is it. There are no three days, no forty days, no annual anniversary, and nothing at all. If his children are righteous, they may give charity on his behalf, there is no objection. They may provide food, there is no objection. They may dig a well of water, build a mosque, this is what benefits the deceased only. As for reciting the Qur'an, it does not benefit the deceased anything except the reward of the son reaching him, as we said, the son only; whether male or female.
So if you keep these facts in mind, you can, on the occasion of your mother's death, do any good in her name between you and your Lord, and that will benefit her. But—may Allah forbid—if she was able to perform Hajj and did not, it returns to the previous discussion. It does not benefit her for you or anyone else to perform Hajj on her behalf, but a voluntary Hajj, he (peace and blessings be upon him) said; all of this is from the righteous deeds that can benefit yourself, and likewise your father.
As for expiation—for example, in our region in the Levant, there may be something they call "expiation of prayer"; meaning a poor father lived sixty years, less or more, and did not pray to Allah a single prayer. Some claimants of knowledge calculate his age of sixty years. When does a young man usually reach puberty? At fifteen. We subtract fifteen from sixty, leaving forty-five. We multiply forty-five by three hundred and sixty-five days. We multiply the result by five prayers every day. It comes out to you as thousands and thousands of prayers. Each prayer is a *mudd* of wheat, a *mudd* of wheat for each prayer. If you read in your time the story of the one who... the "Chess" story... the King of Kisra... this is what they want. The important thing, do you know the story of "Chess"? He said to him: I do not want anything from you except that you give me from the wheat you have in your land with doubling, what? ... this, it was not enough. And these people know that no matter how much wealth a person had... he cannot pay the expiation for all these prayers; therefore, what do they do? This neighbor has jewelry, that one has gold dinars, and so on. They collect them, put them in a bag, they gather the poor and the needy, they play on their minds that we want to distribute charity to you, a bag full of jewels, full of gold, until it matches all the prayers. You accepted this expiation—for example—but against his will, he has to return it or not eat it, and so on from one to one to one, they cleared the conscience of this one who left prayer!! Extreme foolishness and ignorance in Islam and religion... truly.
Therefore, there is no way to benefit the parents after their death except by doing good from the righteous son; therefore he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: . This hadith meets with the verse: , there is nothing higher than that. A place where there is no water, you dug it at your own expense; as long as this water is drunk by a person, or even an animal, these are ongoing charities for the deceased whom you did this for... intention, not just any intention, your father or your mother; because you are from their earnings, as he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: . Therefore, when a man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) complaining about his father, saying to him: O Messenger of Allah, he wants to seize my wealth. He said to him: . Therefore, the needy father has the right to take from his son's wealth even against his will; because it is all his, and his wealth is all from his father's earnings. Likewise, he (peace and blessings be upon him) said in this authentic hadith: .
From this, the importance of parents’ attention to raising their children becomes clear; because these children are the fruit of their efforts in this worldly life. If they raise them well, it is as if they are still living because of their children’s righteous deeds. The lack of interest today by most fathers and mothers in raising their children is due to the Western imitation that has taken hold of Muslims, where a person raises a son or two without thinking of gaining from them after his death; on the contrary, he thinks of gaining from them before his death, and then lives in comfort, as you know the system of the Europeans—for example—they do not like a large number of offspring... the wife and they have two children, and as I say: their fifth is their dog, or their sixth is their dog... whereas the Muslim; Allah is the Greatest, if Muslims knew their religion... He (peace and blessings be upon him) said: . Look at the virtue of raising children... if they live and grow up, every time they say: There is no god but Allah, good deeds are recorded for the parents; every time they pray two rak'ahs, likewise; every time they give charity, likewise; and so on; like a saw, up and down; continuous charities, but for whom? For the righteous parents who took care of raising their children to make them righteous. So if they die, they do not die; because continuous gifts reach them. But naturally, these righteous children will pray, they will fast, at least the obligatory ones; these obligatory acts have good deeds, and some of them are written for the parents... As for parents who die and do not pray, may Allah help them; these good deeds are voluntary and do not benefit them. As for the support regarding the deeds he performed—for example—he performed the obligatory acts but has no voluntary acts, the voluntary acts come from the son or the daughter, meaning it is not important whether male or female; but they must be righteous.
Generally, I have lengthened the explanation for you, perhaps more than necessary, but I...

The questioner: Two questions.

The Shaykh: Yes, two questions, I think I answered you...