What is the ruling on a young person standing up for an older person?
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The Shaykh: And you as well, if Allah wills.
The questioner : We return to the issue of standing and sitting, O Shaykh.
The Shaykh : Please, you have done well.
The questioner : In this country where we live, in the society, meaning, in the custom among people, standing up from the young to the old, as you mentioned, is possible. We can perhaps dispense with some of these customs among the educated people who apply the Sunnah; but what about a person's conduct with his father?The Shaykh : The older person, meaning, how does he behave in this matter, especially if he is sitting on the ground and his father enters upon him? How does he deal with him? This is one question. The second question: Is this not a custom among people to which what applies in Surat al-A'raf, where Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, says—I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan:[Al-A'raf 7:199]? And may Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : And you likewise. As for how one behaves with those who do not know this Sunnah, and how one behaves with his father when he enters upon his son who is sitting, these are undoubtedly matters for which a detailed, general answer cannot be given. Rather, the answer is as I mentioned previously: the Muslim deals with people who know this Sunnah in accordance with it, and in light of this, he should deal with those you mentioned. But there are undoubtedly circumstances and conditions that differ completely. Let us take the father as an example. Some father is like a king to his son, like a king to one of his subjects, arrogant and haughty, like many of the fathers whose news reaches us today. They do not know what is forbidden or what is lawful, while we find their sons raised in obedience to Allah. Some of them are adolescents or have passed that age, wanting to pray the five daily prayers in the mosque, but his father prevents him and stands between him and his obedience to his Lord, Mighty and Majestic. What does the son do with such a father? There is no way to reform this father, for time has worn him down and consumed him. But another father is not like this. Another father feels the blessing of Allah upon him for having provided him with a righteous son who strives earnestly in seeking knowledge. He learns from his son and acknowledges, saying, "By Allah, before this time, we did not know the difference between the Sunnah and religious innovation, or between the obligatory and the recommended, and so on. We lived as the animals lived." It is very easy for the son to understand with him, so that he explains to him that his honoring of him is his following of his commands and his obedience to him. That is the honoring of him, not that he stands up out of hypocrisy, and so on. It is possible to understand with him. As for the first type, you would have to stand up against your will, or else you would be driven out of his house. This is a reality often experienced by young people who are not skilled in dealing with fathers who lived in the pre-Islamic age of ignorance. So he will be forced to go outside the house, and he cannot, O, moderate any of his enthusiasm, because everything has a limit...
Abu Malik: By Allah, the best is justice, O Shaykh...
The Shaykh : ...And what remains of your question?
The questioner : We return to the issue of standing and sitting, O Shaykh.
The Shaykh : Please, you have done well.
The questioner : In this country where we live, in the society, meaning, in the custom among people, standing up from the young to the old, as you mentioned, is possible. We can perhaps dispense with some of these customs among the educated people who apply the Sunnah; but what about a person's conduct with his father?The Shaykh : The older person, meaning, how does he behave in this matter, especially if he is sitting on the ground and his father enters upon him? How does he deal with him? This is one question. The second question: Is this not a custom among people to which what applies in Surat al-A'raf, where Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, says—I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan:
Take what is given freely, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant.
خذ العفو وأمر بالعرف وأعرض عن الجاهلينThe Shaykh : And you likewise. As for how one behaves with those who do not know this Sunnah, and how one behaves with his father when he enters upon his son who is sitting, these are undoubtedly matters for which a detailed, general answer cannot be given. Rather, the answer is as I mentioned previously: the Muslim deals with people who know this Sunnah in accordance with it, and in light of this, he should deal with those you mentioned. But there are undoubtedly circumstances and conditions that differ completely. Let us take the father as an example. Some father is like a king to his son, like a king to one of his subjects, arrogant and haughty, like many of the fathers whose news reaches us today. They do not know what is forbidden or what is lawful, while we find their sons raised in obedience to Allah. Some of them are adolescents or have passed that age, wanting to pray the five daily prayers in the mosque, but his father prevents him and stands between him and his obedience to his Lord, Mighty and Majestic. What does the son do with such a father? There is no way to reform this father, for time has worn him down and consumed him. But another father is not like this. Another father feels the blessing of Allah upon him for having provided him with a righteous son who strives earnestly in seeking knowledge. He learns from his son and acknowledges, saying, "By Allah, before this time, we did not know the difference between the Sunnah and religious innovation, or between the obligatory and the recommended, and so on. We lived as the animals lived." It is very easy for the son to understand with him, so that he explains to him that his honoring of him is his following of his commands and his obedience to him. That is the honoring of him, not that he stands up out of hypocrisy, and so on. It is possible to understand with him. As for the first type, you would have to stand up against your will, or else you would be driven out of his house. This is a reality often experienced by young people who are not skilled in dealing with fathers who lived in the pre-Islamic age of ignorance. So he will be forced to go outside the house, and he cannot, O, moderate any of his enthusiasm, because everything has a limit...
Abu Malik: By Allah, the best is justice, O Shaykh...
The Shaykh : ...And what remains of your question?
Source
www.al-albany.com
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