A man said to his wife, "If you enter the house, you are divorced," but he intended to threaten her. Does his divorce take effect?
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The questioner : He said he divorced his wife by saying, "If you enter the apartment, you are divorced," and he stated that he intended to threaten her with this. Did the divorce take effect or not?
The Shaykh : According to the opinion of the majority of the Ummah and the summary of the Imams, his divorce has taken effect, so that people do not play with divorce. All four schools of jurisprudence agree that his wife is divorced, even if he intended to threaten her. If this is the third divorce, she becomes forbidden to him until she marries another husband with a marriage of desire, and then separates from him by death, divorce, or annulment. Then she becomes lawful to the first husband. This is the school of the majority of the Ummah and all the Imams.
And it is regrettable that people have become negligent regarding this ruling and do not care about it. They divorce their wives over the slightest thing: "If you do not make the tea in fifteen minutes, you are divorced," "If you go to your family, you are divorced," "If you talk back to me, you are divorced," and so on. The marriage contract is the most dangerous of contracts and the strictest in conditions, such that a person does not enter it without conditions and does not exit it except with conditions. Entering it is encouraged, and exiting it is disliked. Exiting it is not like buying and selling. Playing with it to this extent has made people not care; everything is, "If you do such-and-such, you are divorced." By Allah, if women were cheap, how much is the mahr now? How much? Five thousand? Yes, or fifty thousand? Then, if you have fifty thousand, when will you find a woman who knocks on a hundred doors? And she is very small, and so on. Then he divorces his wife over the slightest thing. Glory be to Allah, this is playing with it. Therefore, we say: if he says to his wife, "If you enter the house, you are divorced," as a threat, and she enters, his wife is divorced according to the school of whom? The majority of the Ummah and all the Imams: Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, Imam al-Shafi'i, Imam Malik, Imam Abu Hanifah, and their followers, the great scholars of knowledge, hold this view. So the matter is not light, O brothers, and leniency in it is not permissible.
But Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) and those who followed him say: "If he intended an oath by that—meaning threatening, preventing, or urging—then its ruling is the ruling of an oath. If he contradicts it, he must pay the expiation for the oath." He (may Allah have mercy on him) supported this with evidence. In any case, even if we say that his statement is the correct and stronger position, it is not permissible to play with the matter. It is not permissible to play with it. For example, this is the last divorce for his wife. He said, "If you enter this room, you are divorced," and it is the last divorce. If she enters, according to the majority of the Ummah and all the Imams, she becomes forbidden to him.
According to the opinion of Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) and those who agreed with him, she becomes lawful to him, and he pays the expiation for an oath.
This man now, after the woman enters this room and he has intercourse with her—intercourse with her is zina according to the majority of the Ummah. Intercourse with her is zina according to the majority of the Ummah, and according to all the Imams, and according to Shaykh al-Islam and those who followed him, he pays the expiation for an oath, and the intercourse is lawful. What do I do with the fact that the majority of the Muslim Ummah is of the opinion that it is haram and that it is zina?
For this reason, I say from this place: I warn the servants of Allah against this playing with divorce. I say: Fear your Lord. Do not have intercourse with a private part that is haram for you, for you will be held accountable for it on the Day of Resurrection. Control yourself. If you do not want her to enter this room, say, "By Allah, you will not enter the room." If she contradicted you, pay the expiation. If she agreed, that is what was desired.
Then I advise something else. Many people, especially young men, find it easy to say to their wives, "If you do not do such-and-such, I will divorce you." If you do not do it, do not divorce, because he did not say, "If you do not do such-and-such, you are divorced." He said, "I will divorce you." This is a promise that he may fulfill and may not fulfill. But with that, I advise him not to mention divorce in front of his wife, because divorce is the most hateful thing to a woman. It is the most hateful thing. And if you say that and accustom your tongue to it, she may hate you and the relationship between you and her may become bad. Do not let this phrase come to your tongue at all with your family, no matter how much they anger you. And if it happens that you become angry, here is a word that is a medicine. What is it? "I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan." A man became angry in the presence of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), and he said:Sahih al-Bukhari 6115 Whenever you become angry, say, "I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan." Because anger, as our Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: is a hot ember. And the Messenger said: From where? From the boiling of the blood with this ember that Shaytan threw into his heart. But the medicine, and praise be to Allah, is with the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him). What is it? "I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan." If this medicine works, that is what is desired. If not, there is another medicine. If he is standing, he sits. If he is sitting, he lies down. If that works, that is what is desired. If it does not work, there is a third medicine, which is wudu. He performs wudu until his nerves cool down and what he feels of intense anger disappears. As for some people, may Allah grant us safety, at the slightest anger they divorce their wife or say, "I will divorce you." Leave divorce. Do not let it come to your tongue regarding your wife at all.
The Shaykh : According to the opinion of the majority of the Ummah and the summary of the Imams, his divorce has taken effect, so that people do not play with divorce. All four schools of jurisprudence agree that his wife is divorced, even if he intended to threaten her. If this is the third divorce, she becomes forbidden to him until she marries another husband with a marriage of desire, and then separates from him by death, divorce, or annulment. Then she becomes lawful to the first husband. This is the school of the majority of the Ummah and all the Imams.
And it is regrettable that people have become negligent regarding this ruling and do not care about it. They divorce their wives over the slightest thing: "If you do not make the tea in fifteen minutes, you are divorced," "If you go to your family, you are divorced," "If you talk back to me, you are divorced," and so on. The marriage contract is the most dangerous of contracts and the strictest in conditions, such that a person does not enter it without conditions and does not exit it except with conditions. Entering it is encouraged, and exiting it is disliked. Exiting it is not like buying and selling. Playing with it to this extent has made people not care; everything is, "If you do such-and-such, you are divorced." By Allah, if women were cheap, how much is the mahr now? How much? Five thousand? Yes, or fifty thousand? Then, if you have fifty thousand, when will you find a woman who knocks on a hundred doors? And she is very small, and so on. Then he divorces his wife over the slightest thing. Glory be to Allah, this is playing with it. Therefore, we say: if he says to his wife, "If you enter the house, you are divorced," as a threat, and she enters, his wife is divorced according to the school of whom? The majority of the Ummah and all the Imams: Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, Imam al-Shafi'i, Imam Malik, Imam Abu Hanifah, and their followers, the great scholars of knowledge, hold this view. So the matter is not light, O brothers, and leniency in it is not permissible.
But Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) and those who followed him say: "If he intended an oath by that—meaning threatening, preventing, or urging—then its ruling is the ruling of an oath. If he contradicts it, he must pay the expiation for the oath." He (may Allah have mercy on him) supported this with evidence. In any case, even if we say that his statement is the correct and stronger position, it is not permissible to play with the matter. It is not permissible to play with it. For example, this is the last divorce for his wife. He said, "If you enter this room, you are divorced," and it is the last divorce. If she enters, according to the majority of the Ummah and all the Imams, she becomes forbidden to him.
According to the opinion of Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) and those who agreed with him, she becomes lawful to him, and he pays the expiation for an oath.
This man now, after the woman enters this room and he has intercourse with her—intercourse with her is zina according to the majority of the Ummah. Intercourse with her is zina according to the majority of the Ummah, and according to all the Imams, and according to Shaykh al-Islam and those who followed him, he pays the expiation for an oath, and the intercourse is lawful. What do I do with the fact that the majority of the Muslim Ummah is of the opinion that it is haram and that it is zina?
For this reason, I say from this place: I warn the servants of Allah against this playing with divorce. I say: Fear your Lord. Do not have intercourse with a private part that is haram for you, for you will be held accountable for it on the Day of Resurrection. Control yourself. If you do not want her to enter this room, say, "By Allah, you will not enter the room." If she contradicted you, pay the expiation. If she agreed, that is what was desired.
Then I advise something else. Many people, especially young men, find it easy to say to their wives, "If you do not do such-and-such, I will divorce you." If you do not do it, do not divorce, because he did not say, "If you do not do such-and-such, you are divorced." He said, "I will divorce you." This is a promise that he may fulfill and may not fulfill. But with that, I advise him not to mention divorce in front of his wife, because divorce is the most hateful thing to a woman. It is the most hateful thing. And if you say that and accustom your tongue to it, she may hate you and the relationship between you and her may become bad. Do not let this phrase come to your tongue at all with your family, no matter how much they anger you. And if it happens that you become angry, here is a word that is a medicine. What is it? "I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan." A man became angry in the presence of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), and he said: