Ruling on the statement of the one who says: “It is haram, I will not do such-and-such”
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
A message was received for the program from one of the brother listeners, saying: Your brother in Allah (H. S.) — his question is actually long — he says: I am a young man, twenty-one years old, recently married. Before marriage, I had the habit of swearing by saying: “It is haram that I do such-and-such,” or “It is haram, I will not do such-and-such.” After marriage, I tried to stay away from such an oath, but sometimes I forget and swear by it unintentionally, meaning: it comes out of me against my will, because my tongue has become accustomed to it. I am afraid of the punishment of Allah (Mighty and Majestic) and I want to repent, but I find difficulty in my heart regarding this oath, because I have uttered it more than once. And if Allah wills, I will not return to it. The question is: Does this oath affect my marital relationship, or is it counted as an oath for which I am obligated to pay the expiation for an oath? Please inform us and guide us. May Allah reward you with good?
Answer: First: You must repent from that and refrain from this phrase; because it is not permissible for a Muslim to declare haram what Allah has made lawful. And Allah has rebuked His Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) for that, and He said: [Al-Tahrim:1].
So it is obligatory for you to repent to Allah from that and not to use this declaration of prohibition.
The second matter: You must pay the expiation for an oath, and nothing is attached to your wife. Rather, you must pay the expiation for an oath; because you do not intend to declare her haram, but you intend to declare haram the things you meant, “It is haram for me to do such-and-such,” “It is haram for me to speak about such-and-such.” So if you do what you said was haram for you, or you speak about what you said was haram for you, you must pay the expiation for an oath. So if you say: “It is haram for me to eat your food,” “It is haram for me to talk to so-and-so,” and then you talk to him or eat his food, you must pay the expiation for an oath. It is feeding ten poor people or clothing them. Ten is the number of fingers. You feed each one half a sa' (a dry measure of about 3 kg) of dates, or wheat, or rice, from the staple food of the country, or by weight, approximately one and a half kilograms, for each one of the ten. Or you clothe each one with a garment that suffices him for prayer, such as a shirt, or an izar (lower garment) and a rida' (upper garment). And that is sufficient with repentance and seeking forgiveness. Yes.
The presenter: May Allah reward you with good.
Answer: First: You must repent from that and refrain from this phrase; because it is not permissible for a Muslim to declare haram what Allah has made lawful. And Allah has rebuked His Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) for that, and He said:
O Prophet, why do you prohibit [yourself from] what Allah has made lawful for you, seeking the approval of your wives?
يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ لِمَ تُحَرِّمُ مَا أَحَلَّ اللَّهُ لَكَ تَبْتَغِي مَرْضَاةَ أَزْوَاجِكَSo it is obligatory for you to repent to Allah from that and not to use this declaration of prohibition.
The second matter: You must pay the expiation for an oath, and nothing is attached to your wife. Rather, you must pay the expiation for an oath; because you do not intend to declare her haram, but you intend to declare haram the things you meant, “It is haram for me to do such-and-such,” “It is haram for me to speak about such-and-such.” So if you do what you said was haram for you, or you speak about what you said was haram for you, you must pay the expiation for an oath. So if you say: “It is haram for me to eat your food,” “It is haram for me to talk to so-and-so,” and then you talk to him or eat his food, you must pay the expiation for an oath. It is feeding ten poor people or clothing them. Ten is the number of fingers. You feed each one half a sa' (a dry measure of about 3 kg) of dates, or wheat, or rice, from the staple food of the country, or by weight, approximately one and a half kilograms, for each one of the ten. Or you clothe each one with a garment that suffices him for prayer, such as a shirt, or an izar (lower garment) and a rida' (upper garment). And that is sufficient with repentance and seeking forgiveness. Yes.
The presenter: May Allah reward you with good.
Source
binbaz.org.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.