A man contracted marriage with a woman, gave her the mahr, and gave her many gifts, but after a month she rejected him on the grounds that she did not want him. Does he have the right to demand from her?
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The questioner : He sent a message saying: I am a young man who contracted marriage with a girl from a noble family. After a month had passed since the contract, I learned that the girl had gone back on her word and refused to be brought to me, claiming that she simply does not want me. I tried my best to find out the reason without success. Her family says they cannot force her to marry you because she does not wish to. They say they will return the amount you paid, which is recorded in the contract. I have lost several times that amount. Is she entitled to refuse after the contract has been completed? And if she insists on refusing, are they obligated to pay everything I lost on her, or are they limited to what is in the contract only?
The Shaykh : We say that when you contracted marriage with her, you acquired her.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And she became your wife, and the divorce is in your hand. If you wish, divorce her; if you wish, do not divorce her. But my advice and counsel to you is that, since the matter is as you described, you should ask them for what you gave them and divorce her. For in that is kindness to her and her family, and kindness to you as well. For if you enter upon a woman who does not want you from the start, it will lead, Allah knows best, to bad relations between you in the future. Then life will become bitter and living with her will be harsh. So what I advise you is to leave this woman. You have the right to ask them for everything you gave them. For the wife of Thabit ibn Qays (may Allah be pleased with him) came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allah, I find no fault in Thabit ibn Qays in his character or his religion, but I dislike disbelief in Islam—meaning she did not want him. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to her: She said: Yes. Then the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to him: Sahih al-Bukhari 5273 This is what I see for you, my brother. There are many women besides her. Do not regret what has happened, for you do not know what the outcome will be. And Allah the Exalted said in His Book: [Al-Baqarah 2:216].
The questioner : But what about their refusing to give him anything other than what was recorded in the contract, even though he says he has lost several times that amount?
The Shaykh : In any case, everything he gave them, if he asks for it, is his right. And if he asks for more, it is also his right according to the majority of scholars. For the majority of scholars say that it is permissible to divorce her with more than what he gave her, due to the generality of the saying of the Exalted:[Al-Baqarah 2:229]. For is one of the forms of generality, because it is a relative pronoun, so it is general. But the best for him
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : is to limit himself to what he gave her only, and to seek recompense from Allah the Exalted for what he spent. And if he leaves that for Allah the Mighty and Majestic, then Allah the Exalted will compensate him with something better than it.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.
This listener, M M H from Oman in Jordan, sent several questions.
The Shaykh : We say that when you contracted marriage with her, you acquired her.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And she became your wife, and the divorce is in your hand. If you wish, divorce her; if you wish, do not divorce her. But my advice and counsel to you is that, since the matter is as you described, you should ask them for what you gave them and divorce her. For in that is kindness to her and her family, and kindness to you as well. For if you enter upon a woman who does not want you from the start, it will lead, Allah knows best, to bad relations between you in the future. Then life will become bitter and living with her will be harsh. So what I advise you is to leave this woman. You have the right to ask them for everything you gave them. For the wife of Thabit ibn Qays (may Allah be pleased with him) came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allah, I find no fault in Thabit ibn Qays in his character or his religion, but I dislike disbelief in Islam—meaning she did not want him. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to her:
Will you return his garden to him?
أتردّين عليه حديقتهAccept your garden, and divorce her once.
اقبل الحديقة وطلّقها تطليقةFighting has been enjoined upon you while it is hateful to you. But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.
وعسى أن تكرهوا شيئًا وهو خير لكم والله يعلم وأنتم لا تعلمونThe questioner : But what about their refusing to give him anything other than what was recorded in the contract, even though he says he has lost several times that amount?
The Shaykh : In any case, everything he gave them, if he asks for it, is his right. And if he asks for more, it is also his right according to the majority of scholars. For the majority of scholars say that it is permissible to divorce her with more than what he gave her, due to the generality of the saying of the Exalted:
there is no blame upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself
فلا جناح عليهما فيما افتدت بهnot
ماThe questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : is to limit himself to what he gave her only, and to seek recompense from Allah the Exalted for what he spent. And if he leaves that for Allah the Mighty and Majestic, then Allah the Exalted will compensate him with something better than it.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.
This listener, M M H from Oman in Jordan, sent several questions.