Justice between wives in the verse: “But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry] one woman” — is this at the beginning or after marriage?
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The questioner : Regarding the saying of Allah the Exalted in marriage [An-Nisa 4:3], this applies either at the beginning or after marriage. That is, after one is already married, if he fears he will not be just, he restricts himself to one wife. Or after marriage, if he has married and has two wives, and he is not just, which becomes a cause for divorce, he keeps one.
The Shaykh : The verse is explicit regarding the state at the time of the contract. Either one is confident in himself that he can apply the Shari'ah, which is justice, or he is not confident. If he is confident, he proceeds. If he is not confident, he refrains. However, it is possible for a person to proceed while being confident in himself, but experience defeats him. In that case, a new ruling applies, which is that he tells the one he sees he is wronging at the expense of her co-wife: “O servant of Allah, this is my capacity. You have the choice: either remain with this, or I will set you free.” So she chooses.
The questioner : That is, it is permissible for her to choose to be wronged and remain continuing, and there is no sin on him.
The Shaykh : And there is no sin on him, of course. And why is there a choice? Because what occurred from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) with one of his wives, who was Sawdah bint Zam'ah. He wanted to divorce her because she had grown old. She said, and this is a contract that may not be found in men today, let alone women: “I want to be among your wives in Paradise. Keep me, and I will give my turn to 'A'ishah.” I think the answer is clear.
But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one
فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةًThe Shaykh : The verse is explicit regarding the state at the time of the contract. Either one is confident in himself that he can apply the Shari'ah, which is justice, or he is not confident. If he is confident, he proceeds. If he is not confident, he refrains. However, it is possible for a person to proceed while being confident in himself, but experience defeats him. In that case, a new ruling applies, which is that he tells the one he sees he is wronging at the expense of her co-wife: “O servant of Allah, this is my capacity. You have the choice: either remain with this, or I will set you free.” So she chooses.
The questioner : That is, it is permissible for her to choose to be wronged and remain continuing, and there is no sin on him.
The Shaykh : And there is no sin on him, of course. And why is there a choice? Because what occurred from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) with one of his wives, who was Sawdah bint Zam'ah. He wanted to divorce her because she had grown old. She said, and this is a contract that may not be found in men today, let alone women: “I want to be among your wives in Paradise. Keep me, and I will give my turn to 'A'ishah.” I think the answer is clear.