"So strive in their service" — Is this for the one who is the only child with his parents, or is it not so?
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The questioner : In a hadith, it is stated that a man came to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) seeking his permission to go out to jihad. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) asked him about his parents, and he said: What does this mean? Does it mean that if this brother, or this questioner, for example, is one of the Muslims who has more than two children for his parents, does this hadith apply to him, or to the one who is the only one supporting his household?
The Shaykh : Yes. First, it is obligatory for us to keep in mind that jihad and fighting the enemies in the path of Allah are of two types: an individual obligation (fard 'ayn) and a collective obligation (fard kifayah). If it is a collective obligation, then seeking the permission of the parents is obligatory in light of this hadith, whether the parents have one child or more. If jihad is a collective obligation, it is not permissible for the children to engage in this jihad except with the permission of their parents. However, if jihad is an individual obligation, as is the case in this time, and especially in Afghanistan, as we believe, then one does not seek the permission of the parents except in one case: when there is no one to attend to their needs and serve them except the single son, and they are in need of his service. In this case, it is necessary to seek their permission. If they do not give permission, he must compel them, as stated in another hadith in Sunan al-Nasa'i: Therefore, the ruling differs between jihad being an individual obligation, in which case one seeks permission in one case, which is when the parents are in need of the son's service; and if they are not in need, he goes out with those who go out to jihad, even if they do not give him permission. As for the collective obligation, it is not obligatory for every Muslim, so it is permissible for him not to go out and to remain in the service of his parents, whether they give permission or not. This is the detailed explanation.
So strive in them.
ففيهما فجاهدThe Shaykh : Yes. First, it is obligatory for us to keep in mind that jihad and fighting the enemies in the path of Allah are of two types: an individual obligation (fard 'ayn) and a collective obligation (fard kifayah). If it is a collective obligation, then seeking the permission of the parents is obligatory in light of this hadith, whether the parents have one child or more. If jihad is a collective obligation, it is not permissible for the children to engage in this jihad except with the permission of their parents. However, if jihad is an individual obligation, as is the case in this time, and especially in Afghanistan, as we believe, then one does not seek the permission of the parents except in one case: when there is no one to attend to their needs and serve them except the single son, and they are in need of his service. In this case, it is necessary to seek their permission. If they do not give permission, he must compel them, as stated in another hadith in Sunan al-Nasa'i: