The Shaykh’s explanation of the harms of free mixing in workplaces

The Shaykh : I think you agree with us that the male and female employees in some departments, there is no doubt that problems arise from it; why? The answer: because of the free mixing. This free mixing, and praise be to Allah, as you said, is not actually happening in your place, but the preliminaries of free mixing, such as pinching and the like, are present, as you mentioned. So this...

The questioner : Excuse me, it is a matter of pinching and touching. I think that I have not seen this in my workplace.

The Shaykh : Excuse me, you answered me with agreement... and now there is...
Al-Halabi : In terms of possibility.

The questioner : In terms of possibility. Excuse me, since I am a sergeant, sometimes Abu Ahmad sends me for a purpose regarding this matter, so I delay until the girls leave, or if there is a space...

The Shaykh : This is not possible. What do they call you? Abu what?

The questioner : Abu Ra'id.

The Shaykh : Abu Ra'id, welcome. This is not possible. Do you have a young man with you?
Abu Ra'id: Three.

The Shaykh : Good, and how many girls?
Abu Ra'id: Four.

The Shaykh : So you have only two eyes and only one mind, so you are not able to monitor the three young men and the four girls.
Abu Ra'id: Correct.

The Shaykh : And therefore, this is a non-practical matter.
Abu Ra'id: Exactly, yes.

The Shaykh : So stick to your initial agreement with me — and the Shaykh of the Sunnah (may Allah have mercy on him) laughs — do not try to go around in circles. Okay, let us return to the male and female employees. You know the problems that occur there, right? It is true that the problems that occur there do not occur in your place, because there is no physical free mixing, but some of what occurs there occurs in your place. When I was in Damascus, a female employee called me on the phone and asked me about the problem she had encountered. What was the problem? She said: I am an employee, and by Allah, I forgot what the department was. And her colleague said to her, and I disapprove of a woman calling another woman a "colleague," because today this is like if she said "my brother" or "my sibling." Do you see? There is no longer a feeling that this protected, respected, and valued woman, whom we no longer see or hear about at all, says with what? With indifference, "I have a colleague." One day, while we were talking to each other, and what did they say? We went on in the conversation... we continued the conversation. He said to her, "Marry me," and so on. We did a marriage, but just as a joke, yes, as a joke. I said to her: The hadith says: The point is: So I advised this girl first that your presence in this place is a mistake, and one of the signs of the mistake is this story that happened to you. If you had asked me a different question, it would have been obligatory upon you that you became the wife of this so-called colleague against your will; because of this hadith. But we see that a serious divorce, which is a joke, requires the conditions of marriage, which is the permission of the guardian. But some scholars say if the girl has reached the age of maturity, she marries herself. But we tell you, if the guardian was present in the same council and it was all a play and a joke, you would have become a wife against your will. But when the guardian was not present, and praise be to Allah, the matter became idle talk. But first: the summary of the matter is that it is not permissible for you to be an employee in that place. Second: it is not permissible for you to open a field for the young men to talk to you, even to the extent of a formal, joking marriage. So my intention is that the wise Lawgiver, when He forbade the look and the listening, it is from the perspective of blocking the means to harm; because evil does not come in a single jump, but rather, as you described, Shuqi exactly: "A look, then a smile, then a conversation." And so on. And I cannot imagine that these three young men with four girls, that their looks do not fall, not that their looks do not fall, but that they do not direct their looks to one of these girls, that they do not know which one is prettier than which, and which one is uglier than which. This is impossible; because in the nature of souls, it is innate in man; and therefore, a person must strive against his own self. Among the types of striving is taking barriers and solutions between evil and a person falling into it. In this consideration, we advise you that if you cannot, as you indicated earlier, that these girls sew in their homes, because they will be under your supervision and guidance, and so on, at least place a barrier between the young women and the young men.

The questioner : May Allah grant you health.

The Shaykh : Be patient a little. But my problem now is not with the three young men, there is here, I understood that there is a fourth young man, who is he? — he laughsThe Shaykh : (may Allah have mercy on him) — This is you, what Allah willed, in the prime of youth, and then you are well-groomed, like the young men. I am afraid for you from them now. He laughs (may Allah have mercy on him).

The questioner : No, I do not exempt myself, and I deserve this from you.

The Shaykh : How?
Al-Halabi : He says that he does not exempt himself and deserves this from you, meaning what you are saying is correct.

The Shaykh : Good, so free your mind from this problem; because girls in general do not like bearded men like us, because they run away from them, but the opposite is exactly the opposite, especially the girls of the end times. They like the young man who, what did they call him? It is a strange word.

The questioner : I mean, modern.

The Shaykh : Yes, something like that, yes. So they like the civilized, modern young man. And from that, what? One who imitates women, and smooths his face until his face becomes like the face of women and girls. We are afraid for you from the girls. We were in the problem of the three young men, now we have four by four — he laughs (may Allah have mercy on him) —