Is there a specific duration for a traveling husband before he must return to his family?
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The questioner : Regarding a man traveling far from his family, is there a specific duration such that he must return quickly? And if he returns, should he return at night or not?
The Shaykh : The answer to this question is that the man, meaning the husband, is the one who determines it, not the mufti.The Shaykh : Why? Because the husband is more aware of his wife's condition in what is called today the sexual aspect. Among women, there is the one who is full of heat, desire, and longing for marriage and intercourse, and there is the woman who is as cold as winter ice. Between these two are degrees that only Allah (Mighty and Majestic) knows, above all else. Then there is the husband afflicted with one or the other. (Everyone laughs)The Shaykh : And your honorable request, may Allah preserve them. So, if the husband, for example, knows that his wife has that coldness, he naturally takes whatever time he wishes, if Allah wills, for his comfort. But if he knows the opposite, he must pack up quickly and go to her to give her her right, which Allah has made obligatory for her. Yes, did you understand the answer?
The questioner : Yes. And if he wants to return to his country?
The Shaykh : The answer to the second part remains.
The questioner : Our Shaykh, is there anything reported from 'Umar ibn al-Khattab regarding this, that he specified four months?
The Shaykh : Yes, that specification was likely for an army. As for us, we are discussing individuals. Nevertheless, I will now mention a thought that came to my mind: if we had a Muslim caliph today, we would see him, if Allah wills.
The questioner : We ask Allah for that.
The Shaykh : Yes, it is not permissible to imitate 'Umar ibn al-Khattab.
The questioner : Oh, wonderful!
The Shaykh : Ah, why? Because it is permissible that he sees the intense desire currently controlling women and men is greater than in that time. Therefore, he is not obligated to adhere to four months; he might see three months.
Al-Halabi : So the issue is relative, our Shaykh?
The Shaykh : The issue is relative. Let us return to complete the answer to the second part of the question. There are many authentic hadiths in the two Sahihs that the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) forbade a man to visit his family at night. This was explained in some authentic narrations so that the disheveled one can comb her hair and the one who has not shaved can shave, meaning she prepares to receive her husband and is not surprised by a sudden arrival that might distress her. So, if we know the reason for the prohibition of a man visiting his family at night, then we say that the principle of usul al-fiqh states: the cause exists and ceases with the effect. If the cause ceases, the effect ceases. Today, a person in his country, no matter how far it is from his birthplace, can communicate by phone. We will be with you after the 'Isha' prayer today. If she shaves and prepares and adorns herself, etc., she will not be surprised by her husband's arrival when she is not prepared to receive him. So, with this detail, it is permissible. Glory be to You, O Allah, and praise be to You. I bear witness that there is no god but You. I seek Your forgiveness and turn to You in repentance.
Abu Layla : Our Shaykh, can we beat you by having you sit here? May Allah help you?
The Shaykh : You cannot extend this thing to here. (He laughs, may Allah have mercy on him)
The Shaykh : The answer to this question is that the man, meaning the husband, is the one who determines it, not the mufti.The Shaykh : Why? Because the husband is more aware of his wife's condition in what is called today the sexual aspect. Among women, there is the one who is full of heat, desire, and longing for marriage and intercourse, and there is the woman who is as cold as winter ice. Between these two are degrees that only Allah (Mighty and Majestic) knows, above all else. Then there is the husband afflicted with one or the other. (Everyone laughs)The Shaykh : And your honorable request, may Allah preserve them. So, if the husband, for example, knows that his wife has that coldness, he naturally takes whatever time he wishes, if Allah wills, for his comfort. But if he knows the opposite, he must pack up quickly and go to her to give her her right, which Allah has made obligatory for her. Yes, did you understand the answer?
The questioner : Yes. And if he wants to return to his country?
The Shaykh : The answer to the second part remains.
The questioner : Our Shaykh, is there anything reported from 'Umar ibn al-Khattab regarding this, that he specified four months?
The Shaykh : Yes, that specification was likely for an army. As for us, we are discussing individuals. Nevertheless, I will now mention a thought that came to my mind: if we had a Muslim caliph today, we would see him, if Allah wills.
The questioner : We ask Allah for that.
The Shaykh : Yes, it is not permissible to imitate 'Umar ibn al-Khattab.
The questioner : Oh, wonderful!
The Shaykh : Ah, why? Because it is permissible that he sees the intense desire currently controlling women and men is greater than in that time. Therefore, he is not obligated to adhere to four months; he might see three months.
Al-Halabi : So the issue is relative, our Shaykh?
The Shaykh : The issue is relative. Let us return to complete the answer to the second part of the question. There are many authentic hadiths in the two Sahihs that the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) forbade a man to visit his family at night. This was explained in some authentic narrations so that the disheveled one can comb her hair and the one who has not shaved can shave, meaning she prepares to receive her husband and is not surprised by a sudden arrival that might distress her. So, if we know the reason for the prohibition of a man visiting his family at night, then we say that the principle of usul al-fiqh states: the cause exists and ceases with the effect. If the cause ceases, the effect ceases. Today, a person in his country, no matter how far it is from his birthplace, can communicate by phone. We will be with you after the 'Isha' prayer today. If she shaves and prepares and adorns herself, etc., she will not be surprised by her husband's arrival when she is not prepared to receive him. So, with this detail, it is permissible. Glory be to You, O Allah, and praise be to You. I bear witness that there is no god but You. I seek Your forgiveness and turn to You in repentance.
Abu Layla : Our Shaykh, can we beat you by having you sit here? May Allah help you?
The Shaykh : You cannot extend this thing to here. (He laughs, may Allah have mercy on him)
Source
www.al-albany.com
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.