Continuation of the discussion on whether touching a woman invalidates the ablution or not.

The Shaykh : It is kissing with desire, but on the condition that one feels that something has come out of him, such as pre-seminal fluid, for example, because this... yes.

The questioner : Or semen.

The Shaykh : Semen is, by nature, a long battle, meaning— he laughsThe Shaykh : (may Allah have mercy on him)— until I told the man to understand me clearly, to confirm that kissing is with desire, and that it does not invalidate the ablution unless he feels that that fluid has come out of him. The fluid is pre-seminal fluid, and as some of the early scholars said, "Every male produces pre-seminal fluid." This is a natural matter. So, if he kissed with... I told him this to confirm the matter, even if he bit her, not just kissed her, and even if he bit her and nothing came out, his ablution is valid. This is because it is established from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) that . In a narration from her, she said, and this is part of her gentleness and good style in narrating her hadith, she said: . Then Urwah ibn al-Zubayr said to her, "Do you not know that al-Zubayr is the husband of Asma, the sister of the Lady Aisha? So Urwah is her maternal uncle, and he has a connection to her; he has a connection to her." When the Lady Aisha said: and so on, he said to her, "Who could this be but you? Who could this be but you?" Why did he say this? Because he felt that she was using a subtle euphemism, and because he knew beforehand . He answered directly with Aisha, . So, the people loved Aisha. So, when Aisha says, "He used to kiss some of his wives," where would Urwah’s mind go? To her. Who could it be but you, my aunt? It is as if he is saying, and it is not said here, as some of the fanatics of some schools of jurisprudence say, that the ablution is obligatory for mere touching, not just the kissing mentioned earlier without desire. And this is not conceivable. But it is conceivable that he touches her without desire, for example, to take something, or he shakes his hand with hers. The ablution is not invalidated. It is not said that this ruling, meaning this hadith, that the Prophet used to kiss and then stand up for prayer without performing ablution, is one of his special characteristics (peace be upon him). It is one of his special characteristics, one of the characteristics by which Allah distinguished him from all people. It is not said that this is the case. Why? Here we say: It is always necessary to return to the general rules, and then some exceptions are made from them, as we said earlier about backbiting. So, is the original ruling regarding what the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) did that we should do it, or that we should elevate ourselves and purify ourselves from it, and say that this is specific to the Prophet (peace be upon him)? Or is the opposite the correct view? The opposite is the correct view. Why? Because we have a general Qur'anic text, the rule . So, he is our model. And on the contrary, there is no rule opposing it that says: Do not follow the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) except in such and such. So, we hold fast to the rule and apply it, but when specific texts come to us, like what we mentioned regarding backbiting, we say: This is an exception. For example, our Lord says: . But the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) married more than ten women, and he died with nine in his possession. Do we follow him? Applying the rule, the answer is no. Why? First, because of the verse, and second, because of the hadith that explains it, which is . So, the Prophet’s marriage to more than four is a special characteristic for him. We did not say this based on our own opinion, our ease, or our strictness in religion. No, but because of the verse and the hadith that clarifies the verse, . Similarly, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had some advantages, the most famous of which is that when he fasted, he would continue the fast from night to day, day and night, and the next day and the day after, and so on for nights. Perhaps for a week he would fast on one meal. So, he forbade them (peace and blessings be upon him) and said: . They said, "O Messenger of Allah, you do continue the fast." We see you, what Allah willed, you take the night and the day, and the night and the day, and you are fasting. You do continue the fast. He said: . This is a special characteristic of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). The special characteristic came from two aspects: a legal ruling; because a person is able to continue fasting for many days, and we know men from the Salaf who would fast the whole year, continuing the night and the day, for example, Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr. So, some people have the capacity to abstain from food for a few days or many days. So, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had this special characteristic in terms of its permissibility for him, while it is not permissible for others, even if they are what? Able. Do you know? I think you have heard the story of Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-As one day. His father married him to a girl from Quraysh, and he was an adolescent boy. There were only fifteen years between him and his father; the age difference between the son and the father was fifteen years. So, it appears that he married him early as well, as he himself married early. And he was among the young men of the Companions who were ascetic and eager for worship. Fasting the whole year, standing in prayer at night, fasting during the day. When he married, Amr ibn al-As asked his daughter-in-law, the wife of his son, "How are you with your husband?" She said, "He has not yet touched our bed." Beautiful words. He has not yet touched our bed. Naturally, the father is grieved by this news. What did we marry him for, for his wife to complain about him? He has not yet touched our bed. It is as if we did not marry him. Abdullah, he is narrating the story, said: "Either the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) met me, or he sent to me." He said: . He said, "That was the case, O Messenger of Allah." He said: . He said, "O Messenger of Allah, I am young, I have strength, I am able to do more than that." Meaning, the opposite of our youth today. He is saying: Have mercy on me and give me a dispensation, that I worship Allah more. Today, the older men say, still a sin, still, even if he is leaving off prayer, he says: he is still growing, he is still growing. Look at the difference between the Salaf and the Khalaf. So, no wonder Allah said: . He said: . He said, O Messenger of Allah, I am young, I have strength, I am able to do more than that— may Allah have mercy on you— until the Prophet conceded with him and said to him: . Here is a secret, . Meaning that by this method, he combined the two strengths in fasting: preserving the strength of the body and preserving the strength of the spirit. This happy life that a person lives in his worship of Allah (Blessed and Exalted is He). But if he fasts the whole year until his strength is gone, then if he meets the enemy, he flees and does not stand firm. And at that time, he is like, as it is said: "One who builds a palace and demolishes Egypt." No, . And in a narration, . He said, O Messenger of Allah—and here is the point—I want something better than that. He said: . How is this, when he was fasting and continuing the fast? This is a special characteristic for him (peace and blessings be upon him). I said earlier: a special characteristic from two aspects; from the aspect that the Wise Lawgiver, Lord of the Worlds, permitted for him what was not permitted for the Muslims, and from the second aspect, this special characteristic. I said: the strength for fasting, many people can attain it, but that he spends the night with his Lord, who feeds him and gives him drink, this is a special characteristic for him. And this food is not material food, but rather, if it can be described, it is spiritual, moral food. Otherwise, the one who is fasting (peace and blessings be upon him) is not fasting night or day. He laughs.The Shaykh : (may Allah have mercy on him). And so, do you remember what Ibn al-Qayyim – may Allah have mercy on him – mentioned? Two beautiful verses, like this. It is poetry, but it is lovely. If we extend it with your help, what does he say? He describes his beloved, saying, "Her stories of your remembrance occupy me from food" and from such and such. That is what he means – (may Allah have mercy on him) he laughs. So, the point is: the Messenger – (peace and blessings be upon him) – had specific privileges, but the principle is that following him is the rule, and the specific privileges are followed only when there is evidence. So, if the evidence tells us that the Messenger – (peace and blessings be upon him) – accepted something, and it is not stated that this was specific to him, then we follow him. But here there is a detail mentioned by some scholars, and there is no harm in mentioning it based on the hadith . There is an apparent contradiction here. He said: "So we looked and saw that the one who was given a concession was an old man, and the one who was not given a concession was a young man." An old man and a young man.

The questioner: ... May Allah reward you.

The Shaykh: But it is not the best thing that suits you. I say that the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him), when he gave two different answers, it was because theThe questioner : people were different. This is the height of wisdom, the height of wisdom; because it takes into account the natures of people.The Shaykh The questioner : He permitted it for him, he gave him a concession, and the opposite, he did not give him a concession, why? Because the majority of old men are satiated with the world, and their desire has weakened, whether they like it or not. And the majority, on the contrary, of young men are in the prime of their desire, their strength, and their youth, and so on.
And so I said that it does not suit him, he

The questioner: This is dangerous talk ... .

The Shaykh: Ah, yes, that is fine.

The questioner:..

The Shaykh: regularly, so I say: if we assume that there is a young man who is ill, sick, weak, and collapsed, his ruling would be the ruling ofThe Shaykh : , do you see how it is? It is permissible for him, or he is given a concession. There is no danger in saying to you that you may kiss your wife while you are fasting. Why? There is no trickery in this. And perhaps another old man, just as that one is rare, is also rare to encounter. Perhaps an old man has reached extreme old age, but he is still in his strength and youth, better than that young man, so he is given the ruling of the young man. And what is said is: beware, as the lady Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said: "The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) used to kiss his wife while he was fasting. She said: 'Who among you can control his private part as the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) controlled his private part?'" Who among you can control his private part – meaning his organ, his desire – as the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) controlled it. In summary, the ruling differs between prayer and fasting in that if the one who has performed ablution kisses his wife, there is no danger on him; all that happens is that it obligates him to perform ablution again, and this is from the rule: "Kill the one whose blood money you know." But here, the problem regarding fasting is that it is not permissible to break the fast, did you see? So then he would require a severe expiation, fasting for two months, what? Consecutively. So control yourself, and do not hover around breaking the fast, as he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: Yes.