My father was struck by a severe illness that prevented him from moving, and in most cases I had to remove this device, which forced me to look at my father’s private parts. Now that he has passed away, I still feel fear of Allah and anxiety whenever I remember this.
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The questioner : Her father was struck by a severe illness that prevented him from moving and incapacitated him from attending to his personal needs. She says that in most cases she had to remove and reattach this device, which forced her to look at her father’s private parts. She says: “Now that her father has passed away (may Allah have mercy on him), she still feels fear of Allah and anxiety whenever she remembers this. We ask your excellence for an answer.”
The Shaykh : Yes. I say that the original ruling is that it is forbidden for a woman to look at a man’s private parts, whether he is one of her close relatives or not, except if he is her husband. For spouses, it is permissible for each of them to look at the other’s private parts and touch them, based on the saying of Allah the Exalted:[Al-Mu'minun 23:5-7] As for those other than spouses, it is not permissible for anyone to look at another’s private parts or touch them. Based on this, we say to this woman who mentioned that she looked at her father’s private parts and touched them: We tell her that this is an action that is not permissible as long as the father’s wife can perform it. If the father has no wife, or if he has a wife who is unable to perform this, then there is no blame on his daughter for performing this action, because that is a pressing need, and it may even be a dire necessity.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Because the retention of urine is harmful to a person and may lead to death, and such a matter is permissible. So let her be reassured; if there is no one for her father to perform this procedure other than her, let her be reassured, for there is no sin on her in that, and there is no blame. Let her forget this completely. However, if he had a wife who could have performed this action, but there was negligence and laxity, then this is an action that is not permissible. But there is no action without repentance, for Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, says:[Az-Zumar 39:53] So the conclusion is that we tell this woman: If your direct involvement in this action was out of dire necessity, such that your father had no wife, then this is a permissible action and there is nothing wrong with it. Turn away from it and do not let it concern you. But if he had a wife, but there was laxity and negligence, then this is a sin. However, for every sin there is repentance, and the one who repents from a sin is like one who did not commit the sin. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah reward you. This listener is Umm 'Umar from Iraq, and she says in her question: Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes. I say that the original ruling is that it is forbidden for a woman to look at a man’s private parts, whether he is one of her close relatives or not, except if he is her husband. For spouses, it is permissible for each of them to look at the other’s private parts and touch them, based on the saying of Allah the Exalted:
(5) And they who guard their private parts (6) Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed - (7) But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors -
وَالَّذِينَ هُمْ لِفُرُوجِهِمْ حَافِظُونَ * إِلَّا عَلَى أَزْوَاجِهِمْ أوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُهُمْ فَإِنَّهُمْ غَيْرُ مَلُومِينَ * فَمَنِ ابْتَغَى وَرَاءَ ذَلِكَ فَأُوْلَئِكَ هُمُ الْعَادُونَThe questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Because the retention of urine is harmful to a person and may lead to death, and such a matter is permissible. So let her be reassured; if there is no one for her father to perform this procedure other than her, let her be reassured, for there is no sin on her in that, and there is no blame. Let her forget this completely. However, if he had a wife who could have performed this action, but there was negligence and laxity, then this is an action that is not permissible. But there is no action without repentance, for Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, says:
Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."
قُلْ يَا عِبَادِيَ الَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُوا عَلَى أَنْفُسِهِمْ لا تَقْنَطُوا مِنْ رَحْمَةِ اللَّهِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ الذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا إِنَّهُ هُوَ الْغَفُورُ الرَّحِيمُThe questioner : May Allah reward you. This listener is Umm 'Umar from Iraq, and she says in her question: Yes.