What is the ruling on what is done in some countries, where a check for the deferred mahr is made out to the husband so that he does not divorce his wife?
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The questioner : In some countries where divorce between a man and his wife is common, they impose strict conditions on the husband, meaning they write out documents for him that far exceed the mahr, which are considered debts upon him. So, does a person have...?
The Shaykh : And what does he do?
The questioner : I mean, for example...
The Shaykh : Is there anyone who finds twenty thousand that does not contradict...?
The questioner : One might find...
The Shaykh : Well, if this is its value, it is the mahr of the like in this country. Therefore, may people follow one another’s example and say, "No, it is not possible."
The questioner : It is better for him not to divorce. He says, "If I divorce, we will take this check."
The Shaykh : Yes, that is correct. They say this is a binding appearance, and Allah knows best. They increase the deferred mahr so that he does not divorce. Well, why does he not say, "No"?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Well, he says, "No, I will not bind myself to debts reaching this amount." They do not marry him; he goes around to others.
The questioner : If he dies from her or she dies from him, this check is void. This is just a binding for him, but only in the case of divorce.
The Shaykh : Glory be to Allah, this is a contradiction of the Shari'ah from another aspect, because it has been established for us that if one of them dies, it is accelerated. But these people say if one of them dies, it is dropped.
The questioner : I mean, they bind it with this check, saying, "If you divorce her, we will take this from you."
The Shaykh : Do you understand now? The meaning of their words is that they estimate the deferred mahr at this large amount so that he does not divorce her. The proof is that if he dies or she dies, it is dropped. This is wrong. This is not valid. And I do not think all your marriages are like this!
The questioner : Not all marriages.
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah. Well, let us look at the other side, O Sa'd.
The questioner : Suppose... the marriage... if he divorces her...?
The Shaykh : This is not valid, because the original purpose of the marriage contract is for permanence, not for divorce. I ask you: it is not befitting for the word "divorce" to ever be on your tongue at the time of the contract, because this means it is temporary. It is best to avoid the word "divorce" absolutely. Perhaps things will become worse, and only good will result.
The Shaykh : And what does he do?
The questioner : I mean, for example...
The Shaykh : Is there anyone who finds twenty thousand that does not contradict...?
The questioner : One might find...
The Shaykh : Well, if this is its value, it is the mahr of the like in this country. Therefore, may people follow one another’s example and say, "No, it is not possible."
The questioner : It is better for him not to divorce. He says, "If I divorce, we will take this check."
The Shaykh : Yes, that is correct. They say this is a binding appearance, and Allah knows best. They increase the deferred mahr so that he does not divorce. Well, why does he not say, "No"?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Well, he says, "No, I will not bind myself to debts reaching this amount." They do not marry him; he goes around to others.
The questioner : If he dies from her or she dies from him, this check is void. This is just a binding for him, but only in the case of divorce.
The Shaykh : Glory be to Allah, this is a contradiction of the Shari'ah from another aspect, because it has been established for us that if one of them dies, it is accelerated. But these people say if one of them dies, it is dropped.
The questioner : I mean, they bind it with this check, saying, "If you divorce her, we will take this from you."
The Shaykh : Do you understand now? The meaning of their words is that they estimate the deferred mahr at this large amount so that he does not divorce her. The proof is that if he dies or she dies, it is dropped. This is wrong. This is not valid. And I do not think all your marriages are like this!
The questioner : Not all marriages.
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah. Well, let us look at the other side, O Sa'd.
The questioner : Suppose... the marriage... if he divorces her...?
The Shaykh : This is not valid, because the original purpose of the marriage contract is for permanence, not for divorce. I ask you: it is not befitting for the word "divorce" to ever be on your tongue at the time of the contract, because this means it is temporary. It is best to avoid the word "divorce" absolutely. Perhaps things will become worse, and only good will result.