Ruling on the one who divorced his wife three times

Question:
This questioner, Muhammad Ahmad Ali from Amman, Jordan, says: I married a Muslim woman fifteen years ago, and she bore me four sons and two daughters. However, the marital relationship between us deteriorated at first, then reconciliation was achieved through the intervention of relatives. But the disagreement between us soon returned. I tried to fix the situation by all means, but to no avail. One time, my anger toward her intensified, and I said to her: "You are divorced." I consulted one of the scholars, and he issued a ruling for me to take her back, and I did so. But the harmony between us did not last; rather, she returned to her past behavior and her mistreatment of me in every way she could. So I said to her: "You are divorced, O [Name]," and I named her by her name. A third time, and perhaps a fourth, whenever she mistreats me, I say to her: "You are divorced," without her hearing me. This happened more than three times. Is she now forbidden to me or not?

Answer:
If the divorce came from you while you were in your right mind, with your intellect under control, and the three divorces were completed, she is forbidden to you; because the third divorce is the final one. And Allah the Exalted says: [al-Baqarah: 230]. This divorce is the third one. So if you were in your right mind during the three divorces and said them while your intellect was under control, then these divorces take effect, unless one of them occurred during menstruation, post-natal bleeding, or in a period of purity in which you had intercourse with her, in which case it does not take effect according to the more correct of the two opinions of the scholars.
There is scholarly disagreement on this issue. The majority hold that the divorce takes effect even in the case of innovation, i.e., during menstruation or post-natal bleeding. However, the stronger of the two opinions is that it does not take effect if the divorce came from you while she was menstruating, in post-natal bleeding, or in a period of purity in which you had intercourse with her. It is not permissible to divorce during menstruation, nor during post-natal bleeding, nor in a period of purity in which one has had intercourse with her. Divorce is forbidden in these three states; because it is established in the hadith of Ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both) that "he divorced his wife while she was menstruating, so the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) disapproved of it and ordered him to take her back, then to keep her until she becomes pure, then she menstruates, then she becomes pure, and then if he wishes, he may divorce her before touching her. Then the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to him: " meaning: in His saying, the Exalted: [al-Talaq: 1].
Divorcing them for the waiting period means that the woman is divorced in a state of purity in which the man did not have intercourse with her, or in a state of being pregnant. This is the lawful divorce: that the woman is divorced while she is pregnant, or in a period of purity in which her husband did not have intercourse with her, and her pregnancy was not evident. Because of the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) to Ibn 'Umar: And in the other wording: This indicates that divorce during menstruation or post-natal bleeding, or in a period of purity in which he touched her—meaning: had intercourse with her—is an innovation and is forbidden. But does it take effect or not?
There are two opinions: The majority of scholars hold that it takes effect along with the sin.
The second opinion is that he sins, and he must repent to Allah, but it does not take effect; because of the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) to Ibn 'Umar: And he did not say to him: "The divorce has taken effect." So he said: meaning: take her back. And in one wording: "So he took her back, and he did not consider it a valid divorce." Ibn 'Umar said: "So he took her back, and he did not consider it a valid divorce," meaning: he did not consider it a valid divorce that had taken effect, according to the correct view. But along with this, you must repent to Allah if you took her back after the third divorce without being careful and without asking. It is obligatory for the believer to ask and not to proceed with anything except with insight. So the third divorce forbids her to you, unless there is a barrier to its taking effect.
So you must contact the people of knowledge, along with the woman and her guardian, so that they can investigate your case, and so that they can know her state at the time of the divorce. After that, the scholar will issue a ruling for you based on what becomes clear to him religiously, when you are present with the woman and her guardian, and you all ask about what happened. And you have known from this speech that the final, third divorce forbids her to you until she marries a husband other than you, if the three divorces took place in a state of purity in which you did not have intercourse with her, or if they took place while she was pregnant, then she is forbidden to you until she marries a husband other than you. But if one of the divorces took place during menstruation or post-natal bleeding, or in a period of purity in which you had intercourse with her, then it does not take effect, and she still has one divorce remaining if the number of divorces that took place was three. And if the number that took place was four, this is greater and more heinous. How is it permissible for you to contact her after the third divorce, without asking and without consulting the people of knowledge?
The point is: that you must ask the people of knowledge, and be careful in your case. Her guardian and the woman must also be with you when asking, so that the scholar can be careful about what happened between you, and so that he can issue a ruling for you based on what he sees religiously. We ask Allah for guidance for everyone.

The presenter: O Allah, amen. May Allah reward you with the best reward.