Explanation of the words of Imam al-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) regarding what he quoted: "
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The Shaykh : In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful:
The author (may Allah have mercy on him) said, regarding what he quoted from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) concerning the treatment of women: That the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: : This means, accept this advice that I am giving you, and that is to do good to women, because women are deficient in intellect, deficient in religion, deficient in thinking, and deficient in all their affairs. For they were created from a rib. That is, Adam (peace be upon him) was created by Allah without a father or a mother; He created him from dust, then said to him, "Be," and he was. When Allah the Exalted intended to spread this creation from him, He created his wife from him, so He created her from his crooked rib. Thus, she was created from the crooked rib. And the crooked rib, if you enjoy it, you will enjoy it, and in it is crookedness; and if you try to straighten it, it will break.
So this woman, too, if a man enjoys her, he will enjoy her despite her crookedness, and he should be satisfied with what is easy. And if he wants her to be straight, she will not be straight, and he will not be able to achieve that. So even if she is straight in her religion, she will not be straight in what her nature requires, and she will not be for her husband as he wants in everything. Rather, there must be some opposition, and there must be some shortcoming, along with the deficiency that is in her.
So she is deficient by the nature of her innate disposition and her nature, and she is also shortcoming. If you try to straighten her, you will break her, and her breaking is her divorce. This means that if you try to make her straight for you as you want, it is not possible, and at that time you will be fed up with her and divorce her. So her breaking is her divorce.
And in this is guidance from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) to the treatment of a man with his family, and that he should take from them what is easy, as Allah the Exalted said: : This means what is forgiven and easy of the people's character, [Al-A'raf 7:199] .
And it is not possible to find a woman, no matter what the case, who is one hundred percent free from fault, or one hundred percent suitable for her husband. But as the Prophet (peace be upon him) guided: Enjoy her despite the crookedness in her.
And also, if you dislike a character trait in her, be satisfied with another character trait in her, so counter this with that with patience. And Allah the Exalted said:[An-Nisa 4:19] , and success is from Allah.
The author (may Allah have mercy on him) said, regarding what he quoted from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) concerning the treatment of women: That the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
Treat women with kindness
استوصوا بالنساء خيراًSo this woman, too, if a man enjoys her, he will enjoy her despite her crookedness, and he should be satisfied with what is easy. And if he wants her to be straight, she will not be straight, and he will not be able to achieve that. So even if she is straight in her religion, she will not be straight in what her nature requires, and she will not be for her husband as he wants in everything. Rather, there must be some opposition, and there must be some shortcoming, along with the deficiency that is in her.
So she is deficient by the nature of her innate disposition and her nature, and she is also shortcoming. If you try to straighten her, you will break her, and her breaking is her divorce. This means that if you try to make her straight for you as you want, it is not possible, and at that time you will be fed up with her and divorce her. So her breaking is her divorce.
And in this is guidance from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) to the treatment of a man with his family, and that he should take from them what is easy, as Allah the Exalted said:
Take what is easy
خُذِ الْعَفْوَenjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant.
وَأْمُرْ بِالْعُرْفِ وَأَعْرِضْ عَنِ الْجَاهِلِينَAnd it is not possible to find a woman, no matter what the case, who is one hundred percent free from fault, or one hundred percent suitable for her husband. But as the Prophet (peace be upon him) guided: Enjoy her despite the crookedness in her.
And also, if you dislike a character trait in her, be satisfied with another character trait in her, so counter this with that with patience. And Allah the Exalted said: