What is obligatory upon the woman in the waiting period and what is permissible for her
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
This is a letter from a female citizen of Iraq: Khamriyyah Salman, from Iraq - Baghdad - Al-Dawrah, Al-Mahdi City. The sister says in her letter:
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Greetings. Peace be upon you, and Allah's mercy and blessings.
I am a woman who became a widow after the death of my husband (may Allah have mercy on him), which caused me to observe the waiting period for him. After I began observing the waiting period, several questions were put before me regarding the waiting period, according to the statements of neighbors and relatives, which are: not looking at any person, even if that person is a child one year old; likewise, not looking at any person, even if it is an accidental glance, such as from behind a window or a garden fence. And according to their statement also: that when I look at any of the people, I must restart the waiting period again. Please inform us, may Allah reward you?
Answer: These are statements that have no basis in truth. These are false statements from the ignorance of the common people and their lies and lack of insight. They lie about things and say them without any proof or evidence. So all of this has no basis. The woman in the waiting period is allowed to look at children and non-children. She looks at men without seclusion and without desire. If a man passes by her and she sees him from the window or on the road, or she sees a boy, whether he is seven years old, ten years old, or older, all of this is without blame, and there is no harm in it. Rather, this is the talk of the common people which has no basis. The woman in the waiting period is allowed to look at men with a look that contains no seclusion, no suspicion, and no desire. The general look from the roads and from the windows, and looking at boys. And she is allowed to greet her neighbors and her relatives without shaking hands. She greets them if they greet her, by way of the telephone or by way of the door, without seclusion, and there is no harm in that, and without suspicion. She is allowed to greet her relatives and those who are not relatives. But if they are not mahram (close relatives), she is not allowed to shake hands with anyone who is not a mahram, and she is not allowed to uncover herself for him. Rather, she speaks to them from behind a veil, covering her face and body. She speaks to whoever speaks to her, and greets whoever greets her, from among relatives, neighbors, and others. She answers the telephone if he calls her by telephone. All of this is without blame, and praise be to Allah.
And what is required of her is five things:
The first thing: that she remains in the house in which her husband died and in which she was residing. If it is suitable for remaining in it, she remains in it until she completes the waiting period. But if it is dilapidated, or if her family requested it because it is rented and her family requested it, or if the period has completed, or if she has no one to keep her company and she feels lonely, then there is no harm in her moving if no one is available to keep her company.
Second: she is not allowed to wear beautiful clothes. She wears clothes that are not beautiful, that do not attract attention, such as black, blue, green, and the like. This is what is obligatory upon her. As for beautiful clothes, she leaves them.
Third: she avoids perfumes, from incense... oud, amber, and other types of perfumes. She avoids perfume until her waiting period ends, except if she becomes pure from her menstruation, if she menstruates. Then there is no harm in her using incense at the time of purity from her menstruation.
Fourth: avoiding jewelry of gold, silver, and diamonds. She does not wear this jewelry until she finishes her waiting period.
Fifth: not using kohl, henna, or makeup. She also avoids this adornment until she finishes her waiting period. These are the five things required of the woman in the waiting period. As for anything else, she is like other people: she speaks to whom she wishes, she looks at men with a look that is without blame as mentioned before, she shakes hands with her mahram (close relatives) such as her brothers, maternal uncles, and paternal uncles, she speaks by way of the telephone to whoever calls her, and so on, of what other women do, except for the five things we have explained. And Allah is the guarantor of success.
The presenter: May Allah reward you.
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Greetings. Peace be upon you, and Allah's mercy and blessings.
I am a woman who became a widow after the death of my husband (may Allah have mercy on him), which caused me to observe the waiting period for him. After I began observing the waiting period, several questions were put before me regarding the waiting period, according to the statements of neighbors and relatives, which are: not looking at any person, even if that person is a child one year old; likewise, not looking at any person, even if it is an accidental glance, such as from behind a window or a garden fence. And according to their statement also: that when I look at any of the people, I must restart the waiting period again. Please inform us, may Allah reward you?
Answer: These are statements that have no basis in truth. These are false statements from the ignorance of the common people and their lies and lack of insight. They lie about things and say them without any proof or evidence. So all of this has no basis. The woman in the waiting period is allowed to look at children and non-children. She looks at men without seclusion and without desire. If a man passes by her and she sees him from the window or on the road, or she sees a boy, whether he is seven years old, ten years old, or older, all of this is without blame, and there is no harm in it. Rather, this is the talk of the common people which has no basis. The woman in the waiting period is allowed to look at men with a look that contains no seclusion, no suspicion, and no desire. The general look from the roads and from the windows, and looking at boys. And she is allowed to greet her neighbors and her relatives without shaking hands. She greets them if they greet her, by way of the telephone or by way of the door, without seclusion, and there is no harm in that, and without suspicion. She is allowed to greet her relatives and those who are not relatives. But if they are not mahram (close relatives), she is not allowed to shake hands with anyone who is not a mahram, and she is not allowed to uncover herself for him. Rather, she speaks to them from behind a veil, covering her face and body. She speaks to whoever speaks to her, and greets whoever greets her, from among relatives, neighbors, and others. She answers the telephone if he calls her by telephone. All of this is without blame, and praise be to Allah.
And what is required of her is five things:
The first thing: that she remains in the house in which her husband died and in which she was residing. If it is suitable for remaining in it, she remains in it until she completes the waiting period. But if it is dilapidated, or if her family requested it because it is rented and her family requested it, or if the period has completed, or if she has no one to keep her company and she feels lonely, then there is no harm in her moving if no one is available to keep her company.
Second: she is not allowed to wear beautiful clothes. She wears clothes that are not beautiful, that do not attract attention, such as black, blue, green, and the like. This is what is obligatory upon her. As for beautiful clothes, she leaves them.
Third: she avoids perfumes, from incense... oud, amber, and other types of perfumes. She avoids perfume until her waiting period ends, except if she becomes pure from her menstruation, if she menstruates. Then there is no harm in her using incense at the time of purity from her menstruation.
Fourth: avoiding jewelry of gold, silver, and diamonds. She does not wear this jewelry until she finishes her waiting period.
Fifth: not using kohl, henna, or makeup. She also avoids this adornment until she finishes her waiting period. These are the five things required of the woman in the waiting period. As for anything else, she is like other people: she speaks to whom she wishes, she looks at men with a look that is without blame as mentioned before, she shakes hands with her mahram (close relatives) such as her brothers, maternal uncles, and paternal uncles, she speaks by way of the telephone to whoever calls her, and so on, of what other women do, except for the five things we have explained. And Allah is the guarantor of success.
The presenter: May Allah reward you.
Source
binbaz.org.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.