Discussion of the story of 'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr ibn al-'As when his father married him off, and discussion of extremism in religion.

The Shaykh : Perhaps many of you remember the story of 'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr ibn al-'As when his father married him off. Fill this gap, my brothers. Fill it. Come closer, come a little closer. Come closer like this.
'Ayd 'Abassi: ... .

The Shaykh : Pack it in, my brothers. Pack it in. Do not be selfish. Leave space for others.
'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr ibn al-'As was a young man when his father 'Amr married him to a woman from Quraysh. One day, he asked his father-in-law, who was his son's wife, about her situation with her husband. She gave him a polite expression, saying, "He has not yet lain with us in our bed," meaning that he had married but had not consummated the marriage, because he had not yet touched their bed. Why? Because he fasted the whole year and stood in prayer at night. So when would he have time for his wife? There is no doubt that such news would upset the father, whether from a religious perspective or a personal one, because he married him off to protect his chastity and to give him relief. From a legal perspective, it is not permissible for a Muslim to focus on worship more than what Allah the Mighty and Majestic has prescribed, because that is extremism in religion. And the Lord of the Worlds said in His noble Book: And the Messenger (peace be upon him) described something of extremism in a situation where it seems the Muslims understood the opposite of what the Messenger (peace be upon him) intended. That is when the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) performed the Farewell Pilgrimage and, as he was moving from Muzdalifah to Mina, he said to Ibn 'Abbas, "Pick up for me seven pebbles like the pebbles of al-Khadhf," and he pointed, and the scholars say that was the size of a large chickpea. And he said to Ibn 'Abbas on this occasion: So what do people do today when they stone the pillars? We see amazing things. The Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) directed the Muslim to pick up small pebbles because the intention there is not physical combat, but rather a spiritual, moral struggle. Therefore, he advised against enlarging the pebble, lest it hit the heads of many of those gathered around the pillar, and this happens often. If the pebble is large, it may harm the one it hits.
So today we see shoes piled up around the pillar, some on top of others, because the ignorant among the Muslims have not been trained in the etiquette of the religion. They imagine that there is actually a devil standing there waiting for them to stone him. The truth is not so; rather, there is a place where the devil appeared to our father Ibrahim (peace be upon him), and he stoned him with the first pebble, then the second, then the third. The point is that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) warned the Muslims against extremism in religion, even in enlarging the pebble used to stone the pillar.
So in worship, standing in prayer at night, and fasting the whole year, the Messenger (peace be upon him) is even more likely to prohibit it. When 'Amr heard from his daughter-in-law what he heard, he complained to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). 'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr said, "Either the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) met me or he sent for me, and he said: So I said, "That was the case, O Messenger of Allah." He said: meaning, whoever visits you, and your guest Then he began to set out for him, may Allah's prayer and blessings be upon him, a program to follow in his entire life, not to exceed it. He was fasting the whole year. He said to him, "Fast three days of every month." And one good deed is ten times its like. So it is as if he fasted... the whole month in three days? What was the answer? Here is the point. He said, "O Messenger of Allah, I am a young man with strength in me. I am able to do more than that." He is saying the exact opposite of what people say today. They say... how is my youth that I waste my time in less than this worship that I am performing? But the Messenger (peace be upon him) sees what we do not see, as the Lady 'A'ishah said to him when he said to her, may Allah's prayer and blessings be upon him: She said, "And he, may Allah's prayer and blessings be upon him, O Messenger of Allah, you see what we do not see. You are telling me this, Jibril is sending you his greetings, and I believe what you say because you see what we do not see." If the Messenger (peace be upon him) sees with his eyes what we do not see, he is even more likely to see with insight what we do not see with insight. And so the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) was seeing the outcome of 'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr's exaggeration in his worship. And that actually happened. When Ibn 'Amr said, "I am a young man with strength in me. I am able to do more than that," he said to him, may Allah's prayer and blessings be upon him: He also set a limit for him... lastly, he said, "I am a young man. I am able to do more than that," repeating the previous statement. And finally, he said to him, may Allah's prayer and blessings be upon him: He said, "O Messenger of Allah, I want something better than that." He said: This is regarding fasting. Fasting the whole year was not acceptable to the Messenger (peace be upon him) for him; rather, he gave him fasting that actually equals half the year in reward and the reward of the whole year. And this is the true gain. And regarding keeping the whole night awake, which he used to do, he said to him, may Allah's prayer and blessings be upon him: