If there is hatred in your heart for someone due to a quarrel or something like that, but you do not want to speak about it and you try to avoid it, yet you keep talking about it
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The questioner : This questioner from Libya has used the letter S as a code for her name. She says: O honorable Shaykh, if there is hatred in your heart for someone due to a quarrel or something like that, but you do not want to speak about it and you try to avoid it, yet you keep talking about it in your mind without revealing it to anyone, is there a sin recorded for you in that?
The Shaykh : There is no sin on a person for what he tells himself, provided he does not act on it or speak it, based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family)Bulugh al-Maram 8:133 Accordingly, if a person tells himself something about his brother, he is not held accountable for it. And if a person tells himself that he will divorce his wife, but he does not write it or speak it, his wife is not divorced. The whisperings of the soul do no harm unless an action or speech results from them.
However, I advise this questioner and others to remove from their hearts any enmity, grudges, or hatred toward Muslims, and to be patient and seek reward from Allah, even if they are wronged or attacked. For Allah (Blessed and Exalted is He) said[Fussilat 41:34-35] So if you defend yourself with what is best, Allah will soften the heart of your opponent toward you, replacing enmity with friendship and hatred with love. This is a proven reality.
A person may be in conflict with himself in removing grudges and hatred from those who have wronged him, but we say: overcome your soul, and be the one who wrestles, not the one who is wrestled. And remember these noble verses[Fussilat 41:35] meaning that only the patient are granted success in it And remember the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) Sahih Muslim 2588 The soul may tell you that if you forgive, it means defeat and humiliation, but the truth is the opposite. So strive, my Muslim brother, to remove grudges, enmity, and hatred from your Muslim brothers. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah reward you and bless you, O honorable Shaykh.
The Shaykh : There is no sin on a person for what he tells himself, provided he does not act on it or speak it, based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family)
Allah, the Most High, has forgiven my followers what they contemplate on within themselves (i.e. evil thoughts) as long as they do not act upon or speak about them.
إن الله تجاوز عن أمتي ما حدّثت به أنفسها ما لم تعمل أو تتكلّمHowever, I advise this questioner and others to remove from their hearts any enmity, grudges, or hatred toward Muslims, and to be patient and seek reward from Allah, even if they are wronged or attacked. For Allah (Blessed and Exalted is He) said
(34) And not equal are the good deed and the bad. Repel [evil] by that [deed] which is better; and thereupon the one whom between you and him is enmity [will become] as though he was a devoted friend. (35) But none is granted it except those who are patient, and none is granted it except one having a great portion [of good].
وَلا تَستَوِي الحَسَنَةُ وَلَا السَّيِّئَةُ ادفَع بِالَّتي هِيَ أَحسَنُ فَإِذَا الَّذي بَينَكَ وَبَينَهُ عَداوَةٌ كَأَنَّهُ وَلِيٌّ حَميمٌ * وَما يُلَقّاها إِلَّا الَّذينَ صَبَروا وَما يُلَقّاها إِلّا ذو حَظٍّ عَظيمٍA person may be in conflict with himself in removing grudges and hatred from those who have wronged him, but we say: overcome your soul, and be the one who wrestles, not the one who is wrestled. And remember these noble verses
But none is granted it except those who are patient
وَما يُلَقّاها إِلَّا الَّذينَ صَبَرواAnd none is granted it except one of great fortune
وَما يُلَقّاها إِلّا ذو حَظٍّ عَظيمٍno one forgives another except that Allah increases his honor
ما زاد الله عبدا بعفو إلا عزاThe questioner : May Allah reward you and bless you, O honorable Shaykh.