What is your opinion on kissing the heads of scholars and the elderly without shaking their hands, and is this action a deviation from the Sunnah?
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The questioner : He says:The questioner : Your Eminence, what is your opinion of some people who, when they see someone they respect—whether for his knowledge, his religion, his advanced age, or otherwise—stand up and kiss their heads without shaking their hands? Is doing this without the handshake a deviation from the Sunnah or not?
The Shaykh : Yes, this is a pertinent question, and I had intended to speak on it.
A phenomenon has appeared now: when they meet a man they respect, they immediately grab his head, yes, and do not shake his hand. They hold the head and kiss it, replacing the handshake. This is a mistake; it is contrary to the Sunnah. The most honored people among creation were the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) and the Companions. When they met him, they did not grab his head. Rather, the Sunnah is the handshake. Shake hands first, and then, if you wish to kiss your companion’s head, kiss it, or his forehead, for example. But grabbing his head is not done. Shake hands first, then kiss his head or forehead if you wish. And what is your opinion of one who grabs the head with his right hand and shakes hands with his left?
The audience: Hehehe.
The Shaykh : What is this? This happened to me: he held my head with his right hand and shook my hand with his left! Glory be to Allah, this does not happen except through the independent reasoning of people and their honoring of the one they honor.
The student: And out of longing.
The Shaykh : And out of longing, but following the Sunnah is better. Shake hands first, then if you wish, kiss his head or forehead, and if you wish, do not kiss. That is one point.
Second: I have seen some people be stingy with their hand when shaking hands with their brother. How? One of you stands up to shake hands; look at this handshake, Abd al-Rahman, it is stronger.
The student: Just your hand.
The Shaykh : Just like this, he gives you a closed palm, and then you hold it like this. Fine, open the thumb, he says, like this, so that the handshake is complete. But giving him your hand like this, as if it has no fingers, and some people give only the tips of the fingers. No, this is something new. Therefore, I spare no effort when someone shakes my head instead of my hand to tell him, start with the hand. And if he extends his hand like this without fingers, I say, give me your finger, your thumb, so that he learns the handshake that indicates love and unity, when the hand joins with the hand. For this reason, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: And he was silent? No, if you hold his fingers like this, no one can separate them, but if you leave it like this, it is easy to separate. In any case, this question is pertinent, and I had wanted to speak on it, but praise be to Allah. Yes.
The questioner : Your Eminence, is the joining of the rows a condition for the validity of the prayer?
The Shaykh : Is it?
The Shaykh : Yes, this is a pertinent question, and I had intended to speak on it.
A phenomenon has appeared now: when they meet a man they respect, they immediately grab his head, yes, and do not shake his hand. They hold the head and kiss it, replacing the handshake. This is a mistake; it is contrary to the Sunnah. The most honored people among creation were the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) and the Companions. When they met him, they did not grab his head. Rather, the Sunnah is the handshake. Shake hands first, and then, if you wish to kiss your companion’s head, kiss it, or his forehead, for example. But grabbing his head is not done. Shake hands first, then kiss his head or forehead if you wish. And what is your opinion of one who grabs the head with his right hand and shakes hands with his left?
The audience: Hehehe.
The Shaykh : What is this? This happened to me: he held my head with his right hand and shook my hand with his left! Glory be to Allah, this does not happen except through the independent reasoning of people and their honoring of the one they honor.
The student: And out of longing.
The Shaykh : And out of longing, but following the Sunnah is better. Shake hands first, then if you wish, kiss his head or forehead, and if you wish, do not kiss. That is one point.
Second: I have seen some people be stingy with their hand when shaking hands with their brother. How? One of you stands up to shake hands; look at this handshake, Abd al-Rahman, it is stronger.
The student: Just your hand.
The Shaykh : Just like this, he gives you a closed palm, and then you hold it like this. Fine, open the thumb, he says, like this, so that the handshake is complete. But giving him your hand like this, as if it has no fingers, and some people give only the tips of the fingers. No, this is something new. Therefore, I spare no effort when someone shakes my head instead of my hand to tell him, start with the hand. And if he extends his hand like this without fingers, I say, give me your finger, your thumb, so that he learns the handshake that indicates love and unity, when the hand joins with the hand. For this reason, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
The believer is like a single building to the believer, strengthening one another.
المؤمن للمؤمن كالبنيان الواحد يشد بعضه بعضاAnd he interlaced his fingers.
وشبك بين أصابعهThe questioner : Your Eminence, is the joining of the rows a condition for the validity of the prayer?
The Shaykh : Is it?