What is the obligation of one whose father commits forbidden acts of various kinds?
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The questioner : May Allah reward you, O honorable Shaykh. What is my duty toward my father, who does not pray, does not fast, and has been committing forbidden acts for several years? Should I boycott him because he does not accept advice, and when I advise him, he becomes angry, curses, and wants to commit every forbidden act?
The Shaykh : It is obligatory for the son to advise his father and to repeat the advice in a manner that does not bore the father, meaning sometimes and sometimes, and then to ask Allah for his guidance. For the Exalted says:[Al-Baqarah 2:186]. If he is guided, that is what is sought. If he is not guided, it is obligatory to sever ties with him and boycott him, because he is an apostate, and an apostate is in a worse state than an original disbeliever. For example, a Jew or a Christian is less severe than a man who has apostatized from Islam. An apostate is worse than a Jew or a Christian. We ask Allah for safety. Therefore, we say: boycott him and sever ties with him. This does not contradict the saying of Allah, Blessed and Exalted is He: [Luqman 31:14-15]. For this verse is about original disbelieving parents. As for the apostate, he is not to be left in his religion at all. Rather, it is obligatory for the authorities to say to him: either you return to Islam, or you must be killed. If he does not return to the religion of Islam, killing him is mandatory.
The summary of the answer is: we say, offer advice to your father, perhaps Allah will guide him through you, and ask Allah for his guidance. If that happens, it is what is sought. Otherwise, boycott him and sever ties with him. Yes.
The Shaykh : It is obligatory for the son to advise his father and to repeat the advice in a manner that does not bore the father, meaning sometimes and sometimes, and then to ask Allah for his guidance. For the Exalted says:
And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me - indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me
وإذا سألك عبادي عني فاني قريب أجيب دعوة الداع إذا دعان(14) And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination. (15) But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.
وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَى وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ وَإِنْ جَاهَدَاكَ عَلَى أَنْ تُشْرِكَ بِي مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِي الدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًاThe summary of the answer is: we say, offer advice to your father, perhaps Allah will guide him through you, and ask Allah for his guidance. If that happens, it is what is sought. Otherwise, boycott him and sever ties with him. Yes.