A married woman whose husband is her maternal uncle’s son, and who is a teacher for first-grade girls, and who is careful to preserve her religion and creed, but she has been afflicted
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The questioner : This is a message received from the listener Hana, from Bahrain, in which she mentions to the Shaykh that she is married to her maternal uncle’s son, and she also says that she is a teacher for first-grade girls. She mentions that she is careful to preserve her religion and creed, and she praises Allah for that, but she has been afflicted with a husband who does not pray, and she has been blessed with a child from him, and she has been with him for approximately six years without him prostrating to his Lord even once.
The Shaykh : I seek refuge in Allah, I seek refuge in Allah.
The questioner : And I seek refuge in Allah. She says, “By the grace of Allah upon me, I have been blessed with patience and endurance, hoping that he will repent to Allah, and I reminded him of the Fire and the punishment. She says, ‘I informed my maternal aunt that I would go to my family and ask for divorce, and I insisted on it. When my maternal aunt learned of my insistence, she swore that if I did not return to her son, she would cut off ties with my mother and my brothers. So I am confused, O honorable Shaykh, guide me, what should I do? Hana from Bahrain?’”
The Shaykh : This question is a very important and great one, and the listener has heard it as I have heard it. The ruling on this man who does not pray, according to the stronger opinion, is that he is a disbeliever, a disbelief that takes him out of the religion. This is due to the indication of the Book, the Sunnah, and the statements of the Companions. As for the Book, it is the saying of Allah, Blessed and Exalted is He, regarding the polytheists:[At-Tawbah 9:11] And brotherhood in religion is not negated by sins, but it is only negated by disbelief. The sinner, even if he commits the greatest sin, is your brother in religion as long as that sin is not disbelief. The evidence that sins do not take one out of brotherhood in religion is the saying of Allah, Blessed and Exalted is He, in the verse of retaliation: [Al-Baqarah 2:178] So Allah made the intentional killer a brother to the one killed, and killing a believer intentionally is among the major sins, about which Allah, the Exalted, said: [An-Nisa 4:93].
And another evidence that sins, however great, do not take one out of the brotherhood of faith unless they are disbelief, is the saying of Allah:[Al-Hujurat 49:9-10] So Allah made the two warring factions brothers to the faction that reconciles them, even though fighting a Muslim, indeed, fighting a believer, is among the major sins, to the extent that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) made it a form of disbelief, saying: Sahih Muslim 64a But it is a disbelief that does not take one out of the religion, due to his saying: [Al-Hujurat 49:10].
So it is known by this that whoever does not establish prayer and does not give zakah is a disbeliever, because Allah, the Exalted, said in the verse of Buraan:[At-Tawbah 9:11] But it remains to be asked: Do you declare the one who withholds zakah a disbeliever, just as you declare the one who does not pray a disbeliever? We say: No, we do not declare the one who withholds zakah a disbeliever, based on what Muslim narrated in his Sahih from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: Sahih Muslim 987a The explicit wording of this hadith takes precedence over the implication of the noble verse, as is known among the scholars of principles, that when the explicit wording and the implication conflict, the explicit wording is given precedence. And the fact that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said, “Yes,” and the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family): Sunan Abi Dawud 1658Sahih (Al-Albani) indicates that he is not a disbeliever, because if he were a disbeliever, he would have no way to Paradise.
This is the evidence from the Qur'an that the one who abandons prayer is a disbeliever, a disbelief that takes him out of the religion. The method of reasoning with this verse is that Allah, the Exalted, conditioned brotherhood in religion on three conditions: repentance from shirk (associating partners with Allah), establishing prayer, and giving zakah (the obligatory alms).
As for the Sunnah, it is established in Sahih Muslim from the hadith of Jabir ibn 'Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with them both) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said:
And the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, in what was narrated by the people of the Sunan from the hadith of Buraydah ibn al-Husayn (may Allah be pleased with him):Sunan Ibn Majah 1079Sahih (Darussalam) So these are two evidences from the Sunnah regarding the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer.
As for what was transmitted from the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them), 'Abdullah ibn Shaqiq, who is from the Tabi'un (the generation after the Companions), said: “The Companions of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) did not consider any of the deeds, if abandoned, to be disbelief except prayer.” And this is a transmission of consensus that they did not consider any of the deeds, if abandoned, to be disbelief except prayer. For this reason, more than one scholar transmitted their consensus on the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer. Among those who transmitted the consensus of the Companions on the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer is Ishaq ibn Rahawayh (may Allah have mercy on him).
As for the meaning and reasoning, it is said: How can this man have faith in his heart while he is careful to abandon prayer, despite its ease and simplicity, and Allah’s care for it and His honoring of those who preserve it? How is it possible for him to have faith in his heart while he is careful to abandon this great prayer? His care to abandon it and his not praying clearly indicates that he has no faith. And by this, the evidence for the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer is from the Book, the Sunnah, the statements of the Companions, and correct reasoning. And when this becomes clear, the husband of this asking woman, who does not pray despite her continued advice to him, is a disbeliever, a disbelief that takes him out of the religion. He is not lawful for her, and she is not lawful for him, due to the saying of Allah, the Exalted:[Al-Mumtahanah 60:10].
And it is obligatory for this asking woman to separate from the man and not remain with him and not allow him access to herself, because she is forbidden to him and he is forbidden to her until Allah, Mighty and Majestic, guides him and he returns to the religion of Allah for which He created him. For Allah did not create the servants except to worship Him, as He, the Exalted, said:[Adh-Dhariyat 51:56] And let her seek help from Allah, Mighty and Majestic, and let her be patient, and let her count it as a reward, and let her be strong in that. Perhaps Satan will come to her and say to her, “You are the mother of a child, how can you separate from your husband, and what will happen to the child?” Then we say: If a person looks at the reward with Allah and at the punishment that befalls him if he disobeys the command of Allah, all of this becomes easy for him. And her child will not be lost, because if it is established before the judge that this man does not pray, he will not be given guardianship over this child, so the child will remain with her. And if she seeks help from Allah, Mighty and Majestic, Allah will help her and make her affairs easy. But I direct, before concluding my answer, I direct advice to this man, if he is hearing what I am saying, to fear Allah, Mighty and Majestic, in himself and to return to Allah as long as the time of possibility remains. For perhaps death will come to him suddenly, and if he dies in this state, he will not be gathered with the prophets, but he will be gathered with Pharaoh, Haman, Qarun, and Abu Jahl. So let him fear Allah, and let him pray, and let him try which life is sweeter: to pray and worship Allah and return to his Lord and turn to Him, or to remain as he is, distant from Allah, Mighty and Majestic, and fleeing from His religion. I guarantee to him that if he believes and does a righteous deed, Allah will give him a good life and reward him with the best of what he was doing. And do not despair of the mercy of Allah, for if a person’s sins reach whatever they may, if he repents to Allah with sincere repentance, Allah will erase these sins from him, as Allah, the Exalted, said: [Az-Zumar 39:53-55].
Then I say to him that repentance is easy for one for whom Allah makes it easy; it does not require anything but resolve, the resolve of one who is determined. And if he repents before his time comes, Allah, the Exalted, will accept his repentance. Allah, the Exalted, said:[An-Nisa 4:17-18].
We ask Allah, the Exalted, to bestow guidance upon everyone.
The questioner : O Allah, amen.
The Shaykh : And success.
The questioner : O Allah, amen.
The Shaykh : And return to Him and repentance and turning back.
And as for her maternal aunt with her mother, and that her maternal aunt said, “If you do not return to your husband’s house, I will not come to my sister’s house.”
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Then this does not harm this woman. That is, if her maternal aunt cuts off ties with her mother because of her not returning to her husband’s house, then there is no sin on her, meaning on the asking wife. Rather, the sin is on this maternal aunt. And Allah, the Exalted, said regarding those who cut off their kinship ties:[Muhammad 47:22-24].
And I warn her, and others who hear this, against severing family ties, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) saidJami` at-Tirmidhi 1909Sahih (Darussalam) meaning one who severs a family tie. And I say that Allah (Glorified and Exalted is He) has guaranteed to the family tie that He will connect the one who connects it and sever the one who severs it.
So hold fast, O sister questioner, hold fast to your family's home. As long as he is abandoning prayer, he is not your husband. You are not lawful to him, and he is not lawful to you. It does not harm you if your aunt is angry and you do not come to your mother's house; that does not harm you in any way, it only harms your aunt.
Then I say, if this aunt of yours had given advice to her son.
The questioner : Okay, Shaykh.
The Shaykh : and repeated it to him, and became a support for you against him, perhaps Allah (Glorified and Exalted is He) would guide him and expand his chest for Islam and he would pray. Then after that, you would return to him in peace. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah bless you, O honorable Shaykh.
The Shaykh : I seek refuge in Allah, I seek refuge in Allah.
The questioner : And I seek refuge in Allah. She says, “By the grace of Allah upon me, I have been blessed with patience and endurance, hoping that he will repent to Allah, and I reminded him of the Fire and the punishment. She says, ‘I informed my maternal aunt that I would go to my family and ask for divorce, and I insisted on it. When my maternal aunt learned of my insistence, she swore that if I did not return to her son, she would cut off ties with my mother and my brothers. So I am confused, O honorable Shaykh, guide me, what should I do? Hana from Bahrain?’”
The Shaykh : This question is a very important and great one, and the listener has heard it as I have heard it. The ruling on this man who does not pray, according to the stronger opinion, is that he is a disbeliever, a disbelief that takes him out of the religion. This is due to the indication of the Book, the Sunnah, and the statements of the Companions. As for the Book, it is the saying of Allah, Blessed and Exalted is He, regarding the polytheists:
But if they repent, establish prayer, and give zakah, then they are your brothers in religion
فَإِن تابوا وَأَقامُوا الصَّلاةَ وَءاتَوُا الزَّكاةَ فَإِخوانُكُم فِي الدّينِO you who have believed, prescribed for you is legal retribution for those murdered - the free for the free, the slave for the slave, and the female for the female. But whoever overlooks from his brother anything, then there should be a suitable follow-up and payment to him with good conduct
يا أَيُّهَا الَّذينَ ءامَنوا كُتِبَ عَلَيكُمُ القِصاصُ فِي القَتلَى الحُرُّ بِالحُرِّ وَالعَبدُ بِالعَبدِ وَالأُنثى بِالأُنثى فَمَن عُفِيَ لَهُ مِن أَخيهِ شَيءٌ فَاتِّباعٌ بِالمَعروفِ وَأَداءٌ إِلَيهِ بِإِحسانٍBut whoever kills a believer intentionally - his recompense is Hell, wherein he will abide eternally, and Allah has become angry with him and has cursed him and has prepared for him a great punishment.
وَمَن يَقتُل مُؤمِنًا مُتَعَمِّدًا فَجَزاؤُهُ جَهَنَّمُ خالِدًا فيها وَغَضِبَ اللَّهُ عَلَيهِ وَلَعَنَهُ وَأَعَدَّ لَهُ عَذابًا عَظيمًاAnd another evidence that sins, however great, do not take one out of the brotherhood of faith unless they are disbelief, is the saying of Allah:
(9) And if two factions among the believers should fight, then make settlement between the two. But if one of them oppresses the other, then fight against the one that oppresses until it returns to the ordinance of Allah. And if it returns, then make settlement between them in justice and act justly. Indeed, Allah loves those who act justly. (10) The believers are but brothers, so make settlement between your brothers. And fear Allah that you may receive mercy.
وَإِن طائِفَتانِ مِنَ المُؤمِنينَ اقتَتَلوا فَأَصلِحوا بَينَهُما فَإِن بَغَت إِحداهُما عَلَى الأُخرى فَقاتِلُوا الَّتي تَبغي حَتّى تَفيءَ إِلى أَمرِ اللَّهِ فَإِن فاءَت فَأَصلِحوا بَينَهُما بِالعَدلِ وَأَقسِطوا إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ المُقسِطينَ * إِنَّمَا المُؤمِنونَ إِخوَةٌ فَأَصلِحوا بَينَ أَخَوَيكُمAbusing a Muslim is an outrage and fighting against him is unbelief
سباب المسلم فسوق وقتاله كفرThe believers are but brothers
إِنَّمَا المُؤمِنونَ إِخوَةٌSo it is known by this that whoever does not establish prayer and does not give zakah is a disbeliever, because Allah, the Exalted, said in the verse of Buraan:
But if they repent, establish prayer, and give zakah, then they are your brothers in religion
فَإِن تابوا وَأَقامُوا الصَّلاةَ وَءاتَوُا الزَّكاةَ فَإِخوانُكُم فِي الدّينِIf any owner of gold or silver does not pay what is due on him, when the Day of Resurrection would come, plates of fire would be beaten out for him; these would then be heated in the fire of Hell and his sides, his forehead and his back would be cauterized with them. Whenever these cool down, (the process is) repeated during a day the extent of which would be fifty thousand years, until judgment is pronounced among servants, and he sees whether his path is to take him to Paradise or to Hell.
ما من صاحب ذهب ولا فضة لا يؤدي منها حقها وحقها زكاتها إلا إذا كان يوم القيامة صفّحت له صفائح من نار وأحمي عليها في نار جهنم فيُكوى بها جنبه وجبينه وظهره كلما بردت أعيدت في يوم كان مقداره خمسين ألف سنة حتى يُقضى بين العباد ثم يرى سبيله إما إلى الجنة وإما إلى النارhe sees whether his path is to take him to Paradise or to Hell
ثم يرى سبيله إما إلى الجنة وإما إلى النارThis is the evidence from the Qur'an that the one who abandons prayer is a disbeliever, a disbelief that takes him out of the religion. The method of reasoning with this verse is that Allah, the Exalted, conditioned brotherhood in religion on three conditions: repentance from shirk (associating partners with Allah), establishing prayer, and giving zakah (the obligatory alms).
As for the Sunnah, it is established in Sahih Muslim from the hadith of Jabir ibn 'Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with them both) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said:
Between a man and disbelief and shirk (associating partners with Allah) is the abandonment of prayer.
بين الرجل وبين الكفر والشرك ترك الصلاةAnd the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, in what was narrated by the people of the Sunan from the hadith of Buraydah ibn al-Husayn (may Allah be pleased with him):
The covenant that distinguishes between us and them is prayer; so whoever leaves it, he has committed Kufr.
العهد الذي بيننا وبينهم الصلاة فمن تركها فقد كفرAs for what was transmitted from the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them), 'Abdullah ibn Shaqiq, who is from the Tabi'un (the generation after the Companions), said: “The Companions of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) did not consider any of the deeds, if abandoned, to be disbelief except prayer.” And this is a transmission of consensus that they did not consider any of the deeds, if abandoned, to be disbelief except prayer. For this reason, more than one scholar transmitted their consensus on the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer. Among those who transmitted the consensus of the Companions on the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer is Ishaq ibn Rahawayh (may Allah have mercy on him).
As for the meaning and reasoning, it is said: How can this man have faith in his heart while he is careful to abandon prayer, despite its ease and simplicity, and Allah’s care for it and His honoring of those who preserve it? How is it possible for him to have faith in his heart while he is careful to abandon this great prayer? His care to abandon it and his not praying clearly indicates that he has no faith. And by this, the evidence for the disbelief of the one who abandons prayer is from the Book, the Sunnah, the statements of the Companions, and correct reasoning. And when this becomes clear, the husband of this asking woman, who does not pray despite her continued advice to him, is a disbeliever, a disbelief that takes him out of the religion. He is not lawful for her, and she is not lawful for him, due to the saying of Allah, the Exalted:
And if you know them to be believers, then do not return them to the disbelievers; they are not lawful [wives] for them, nor are they lawful [husbands] for them
فَإِن عَلِمتُموهُنَّ مُؤمِناتٍ فَلا تَرجِعوهُنَّ إِلَى الكُفّارِ لا هُنَّ حِلٌّ لَهُم وَلا هُم يَحِلّونَ لَهُنَّAnd it is obligatory for this asking woman to separate from the man and not remain with him and not allow him access to herself, because she is forbidden to him and he is forbidden to her until Allah, Mighty and Majestic, guides him and he returns to the religion of Allah for which He created him. For Allah did not create the servants except to worship Him, as He, the Exalted, said:
And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me.
وما خلقت الجن والإنس إلا ليعبدون(53) Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful." (54) And return [in repentance] to your Lord and submit to Him before the punishment comes upon you; then you will not be helped. (55) And follow the best of what was revealed to you from your Lord before the punishment comes upon you suddenly while you do not perceive,
قُل يا عِبادِيَ الَّذينَ أَسرَفوا عَلى أَنفُسِهِم لا تَقنَطوا مِن رَحمَةِ اللَّهِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يَغفِرُ الذُّنوبَ جَميعًا إِنَّهُ هُوَ الغَفورُ الرَّحيمُ * وَأَنيبوا إِلى رَبِّكُم وَأَسلِموا لَهُ مِن قَبلِ أَن يَأتِيَكُمُ العَذابُ ثُمَّ لا تُنصَرونَ * وَاتَّبِعوا أَحسَنَ ما أُنزِلَ إِلَيكُم مِن رَبِّكُم مِن قَبلِ أَن يَأتِيَكُمُ العَذابُ بَغتَةً وَأَنتُم لا تَشعُرونَThen I say to him that repentance is easy for one for whom Allah makes it easy; it does not require anything but resolve, the resolve of one who is determined. And if he repents before his time comes, Allah, the Exalted, will accept his repentance. Allah, the Exalted, said:
(17) The repentance accepted by Allah is only for those who do wrong in ignorance [or carelessness] and then repent soon after. It is those to whom Allah will turn in forgiveness, and Allah is ever Knowing and Wise. (18) But repentance is not [accepted] of those who [continue to] do evil deeds up until, when death comes to one of them, he says, "Indeed, I have repented now," or of those who die while they are disbelievers. For them We have prepared a painful punishment.
إِنَّمَا التَّوبَةُ عَلَى اللَّهِ لِلَّذينَ يَعمَلونَ السّوءَ بِجَهالَةٍ ثُمَّ يَتوبونَ مِن قَريبٍ فَأُولئِكَ يَتوبُ اللَّهُ عَلَيهِم وَكانَ اللَّهُ عَليمًا حَكيمًا * وَلَيسَتِ التَّوبَةُ لِلَّذينَ يَعمَلونَ السَّيِّئَاتِ حَتّى إِذا حَضَرَ أَحَدَهُمُ المَوتُ قالَ إِنّي تُبتُ الآنَ وَلَا الَّذينَ يَموتونَ وَهُم كُفّارٌ أُولئِكَ أَعتَدنا لَهُم عَذابًا أَليمًاWe ask Allah, the Exalted, to bestow guidance upon everyone.
The questioner : O Allah, amen.
The Shaykh : And success.
The questioner : O Allah, amen.
The Shaykh : And return to Him and repentance and turning back.
And as for her maternal aunt with her mother, and that her maternal aunt said, “If you do not return to your husband’s house, I will not come to my sister’s house.”
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Then this does not harm this woman. That is, if her maternal aunt cuts off ties with her mother because of her not returning to her husband’s house, then there is no sin on her, meaning on the asking wife. Rather, the sin is on this maternal aunt. And Allah, the Exalted, said regarding those who cut off their kinship ties:
(22) So would you perhaps, if you turned away, cause corruption on earth and sever your [ties of] relationship? (23) Those [who do so] are the ones that Allah has cursed, so He deafened them and blinded their vision. (24) Then do they not reflect upon the Qur'an, or are there locks upon [their] hearts?
فَهَل عَسَيتُم إِن تَوَلَّيتُم أَن تُفسِدوا فِي الأَرضِ وَتُقَطِّعوا أَرحامَكُم * أُولئِكَ الَّذينَ لَعَنَهُمُ اللَّهُ فَأَصَمَّهُم وَأَعمى أَبصارَهُم * أَفَلا يَتَدَبَّرونَ القُرءانَ أَم عَلى قُلوبٍ أَقفالُهاAnd I warn her, and others who hear this, against severing family ties, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said
The one who severs ties will not enter Paradise.
لا يدخل الجنة قاطعSo hold fast, O sister questioner, hold fast to your family's home. As long as he is abandoning prayer, he is not your husband. You are not lawful to him, and he is not lawful to you. It does not harm you if your aunt is angry and you do not come to your mother's house; that does not harm you in any way, it only harms your aunt.
Then I say, if this aunt of yours had given advice to her son.
The questioner : Okay, Shaykh.
The Shaykh : and repeated it to him, and became a support for you against him, perhaps Allah (Glorified and Exalted is He) would guide him and expand his chest for Islam and he would pray. Then after that, you would return to him in peace. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah bless you, O honorable Shaykh.