A woman says: My problem, O honorable Shaykh, is that I have been married for three years and I have two children, and my husband does not pray and does not fast, while I am diligent in my prayers.
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The questioner : From the listener from Syria, the listener H.A.Q. In fact, her message is long, and I tried to shorten it, but the sentences are interconnected and the paragraphs are important. She says: My problem, O honorable Shaykh, is that I have been married for three years and I have two children, and my husband does not pray and does not fast, while I, praise be to Allah, am diligent in my prayers and fasting. I have advised my husband to pray and fast, but he refuses. After much effort on my part, he began to fast only, without praying. I begged him to pray, but he refuses to pray at all. I hate him for not praying and not carrying out the matters of religion; he is indifferent and is never in a state of ritual purity. When he asks for me, I refuse because of my intense hatred for him. He does not treat me with kindness. I have advised him many times to purify himself, perform wudu, and read in the Book of Allah, Glorious and Majestic is He, hoping that Allah will open his heart to Islam. I find nothing from him but refusal. He curses the religion and does not bear responsibility for his home, his wife, and his two children. So when I ask for something from the household necessities, I sew clothes and sell them to people for some money. He refused to look for additional work after his shift at his job. I asked him for divorce and expressed the intensity of my hatred for him, but he refused the divorce and said: If you divorce me, I will not give you the girls or anything from the furniture of the house, even though I bought the furniture of the house with gold and jewelry that I sold and bought this furniture with. I do not know what to do, O honorable Shaykh. I have stayed at my parents' house twice, but no one has resolved my problem with him. He has not changed and will not change. I ask you to guide me on what to do. Does the Shari'ah state that the girls and the furniture of the house are my right, or not? Am I sinful if I ask for divorce? I ask you to guide me to what is best for me and my daughters. If possible, please present my problem to His Eminence Shaykh Muhammad ibn Salih ibn al-Uthaymeen, the Imam of the Great Mosque in the city of Unaizah. I ask for a quick response because I am in a whirlpool of my affairs. I listen to this program in which we find peace and stability. Your program, "Light on the Path," which we always follow. May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds, and I send prayers and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions. Before answering this question, I would like to clarify to my brother listeners that the prayer is the greatest pillar of Islam after the two testimonies, and that abandoning it is disbelief that takes one out of the religion. This is based on evidence from the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him), and the statements of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them).
As for the Book of Allah, Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, said regarding the polytheists:[At-Tawbah 9:11] This verse indicates that the polytheists will not be our brothers in religion unless they repent from shirk (associating partners with Allah), establish the prayer, and give zakah. It is known that the ruling is conditional upon a condition, and the ruling is negated by the negation of this condition. So brotherhood in religion does not exist except with the presence of these three things: repentance from shirk, establishing the prayer, and giving zakah. If these three are not present, they will not be our brothers in religion. And brotherhood in religion is not negated by sins, however great they may be. For this reason, Allah the Exalted said in the verse of retaliation regarding one who kills a believer intentionally: He, Mighty and Majestic, said: [Al-Baqarah 2:178] So Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, made the killer a brother to the killed, even though he committed a great major sin. And He, Glorified and Exalted is He, said regarding the two warring factions: [Al-Hujurat 49:9-10] This indicates that brotherhood in religion is not negated by sins, but only by disbelief. Therefore, the one who does not establish the prayer is not a Muslim, but he is a disbeliever, because Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, made brotherhood in religion conditional upon establishing the prayer.
As for the Sunnah, in Sahih Muslim, from Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him), that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:Sahih Muslim 82b And in the Sunan, from the hadith of Buraydah ibn al-Husayb, that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: Sunan Ibn Majah 1079Sahih (Darussalam).
As for the statements of the Companions, Abdullah ibn Shaqiq said: "The Companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) did not consider any of the deeds to be disbelief if abandoned, except the prayer." This is close to a consensus of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them). For this reason, a group of scholars, including the famous Imam Ishaq ibn Rahawayh, narrated their consensus. The meaning also supports this, for a man who does not pray, despite the importance of the prayer in the religion of Allah and its being the pillar of Islam and the ease of performing it, is evidence that there is nothing in his heart of faith. If there were anything in his heart of faith, he would not have abandoned this great, light, and easy prayer. Thus, the disbelief of the one who abandons the prayer is established by the Book, the Sunnah, the statements of the Companions, and the correct meaning. No one who holds that one does not become a disbeliever by abandoning the prayer has brought a proof that negates his disbelief. The most that can be said is that the evidence whose apparent meaning is that one does not become a disbeliever by abandoning the prayer is free from one of four situations: either it has no indication at all, or it is restricted by a description that prevents abandoning the prayer, or it was revealed in a state where one is excused for abandoning the prayer, or it is general and is specified by texts or specified by the texts indicating disbelief by abandoning the prayer.
Based on this, if the husband abandons the prayer, his marriage is dissolved, and it is not permissible for the wife to remain with him until he returns to Islam and prays. If he persists in abandoning the prayer, it is obligatory for her to flee from him. She has custody of her children, both male and female, over him, for he has no right to custody as long as he has apostatized from the religion of Islam, because Allah, Mighty and Majestic, will not make a way for the disbelievers over the believers.
Based on this report, or with knowledge of this report, the answer to this questioner becomes clear, and that it is obligatory for her to flee from her husband by any means, except that Allah guides him and he returns to his religion by establishing the prayer.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds, and I send prayers and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions. Before answering this question, I would like to clarify to my brother listeners that the prayer is the greatest pillar of Islam after the two testimonies, and that abandoning it is disbelief that takes one out of the religion. This is based on evidence from the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him), and the statements of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them).
As for the Book of Allah, Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, said regarding the polytheists:
But if they repent, establish prayer, and give zakah, then they are your brothers in religion; and We detail the verses for a people who know.
فَإِن تابوا وَأَقامُوا الصَّلاةَ وَءاتَوُا الزَّكاةَ فَإِخوانُكُم فِي الدّينِ وَنُفَصِّلُ الأياتِ لِقَومٍ يَعلَمونَBut whoever overlooks from his brother anything, then there should be a suitable follow-up and payment to him with good conduct
فمن عفي له من أخيه شيء فاتباع بالمعروف وأداء إليه بإحسان(9) And if two factions among the believers should fight, then make settlement between the two. But if one of them oppresses the other, then fight against the one that oppresses until it returns to the ordinance of Allah. And if it returns, then make settlement between them in justice and act justly. Indeed, Allah loves those who act justly. (10) The believers are but brothers, so make settlement between your brothers. And fear Allah that you may receive mercy.
وَإِن طائِفَتانِ مِنَ المُؤمِنينَ اقتَتَلوا فَأَصلِحوا بَينَهُما فَإِن بَغَت إِحداهُما عَلَى الأُخرى فَقاتِلُوا الَّتي تَبغي حَتّى تَفيءَ إِلى أَمرِ اللَّهِ فَإِن فاءَت فَأَصلِحوا بَينَهُما بِالعَدلِ وَأَقسِطوا إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ المُقسِطينَ * إِنَّمَا المُؤمِنونَ إِخوَةٌ فَأَصلِحوا بَينَ أَخَوَيكُمAs for the Sunnah, in Sahih Muslim, from Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him), that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
Between man and polytheism and unbelief is the abandonment of salat.
بين الرجل وبين الشرك والكفر ترك الصلاةThe covenant that distinguishes between us and them is prayer; so whoever leaves it, he has committed Kufr.
العهد الذي بيننا وبينهم الصلاة فمن تركها فقد كفرAs for the statements of the Companions, Abdullah ibn Shaqiq said: "The Companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) did not consider any of the deeds to be disbelief if abandoned, except the prayer." This is close to a consensus of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them). For this reason, a group of scholars, including the famous Imam Ishaq ibn Rahawayh, narrated their consensus. The meaning also supports this, for a man who does not pray, despite the importance of the prayer in the religion of Allah and its being the pillar of Islam and the ease of performing it, is evidence that there is nothing in his heart of faith. If there were anything in his heart of faith, he would not have abandoned this great, light, and easy prayer. Thus, the disbelief of the one who abandons the prayer is established by the Book, the Sunnah, the statements of the Companions, and the correct meaning. No one who holds that one does not become a disbeliever by abandoning the prayer has brought a proof that negates his disbelief. The most that can be said is that the evidence whose apparent meaning is that one does not become a disbeliever by abandoning the prayer is free from one of four situations: either it has no indication at all, or it is restricted by a description that prevents abandoning the prayer, or it was revealed in a state where one is excused for abandoning the prayer, or it is general and is specified by texts or specified by the texts indicating disbelief by abandoning the prayer.
Based on this, if the husband abandons the prayer, his marriage is dissolved, and it is not permissible for the wife to remain with him until he returns to Islam and prays. If he persists in abandoning the prayer, it is obligatory for her to flee from him. She has custody of her children, both male and female, over him, for he has no right to custody as long as he has apostatized from the religion of Islam, because Allah, Mighty and Majestic, will not make a way for the disbelievers over the believers.
Based on this report, or with knowledge of this report, the answer to this questioner becomes clear, and that it is obligatory for her to flee from her husband by any means, except that Allah guides him and he returns to his religion by establishing the prayer.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.