What is the ruling on gathering with the family of the deceased and eating from the food prepared for this gathering?
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The questioner : Shaykh, it is the custom of the family of the deceased on the seventh day to gather in a sitting and recite the Qur'an, then they recite it for the deceased, then they gather for the evening meal and eating and invite people. Is there any blame in inviting people, and is it permissible to eat from this food?
The Shaykh : First: May Allah reward you. This act is a religious innovation (bid'ah). In fact, the apparent meaning of the hadith of Jarir ibn 'Abd Allah al-Bajali (may Allah be pleased with him) when he said:Sunan Ibn Majah 1612Da’if (Darussalam) indicates that this is a major sin among the major sins. Therefore, it is not permissible to gather in the first place, and whoever is invited to this gathering should not respond. Do you understand?
As for the food, it is lawful in itself as food, but responding to the invitation and eating from it, given that it arises from a religious innovation (bid'ah) or wailing, is forbidden.
For this reason, I see that it is obligatory for you, O students, to clarify this to the people. Say to them: Why do you burden yourselves with a matter that only increases your distance from Allah? Where were the Companions and the Tabi'un regarding this practice?
Was it hidden from them and its knowledge reserved for you?
Or did they know of it but leave it?
All of this is impossible. So clarify this to the people and say: Do not say, "We found our fathers upon a nation, and we are following in their footsteps." The truth is established and remains until the Day of Resurrection.
The Shaykh : First: May Allah reward you. This act is a religious innovation (bid'ah). In fact, the apparent meaning of the hadith of Jarir ibn 'Abd Allah al-Bajali (may Allah be pleased with him) when he said:
We used to think that gathering with the family of the deceased and preparing food was a form of wailing.
كنا نعد الاجتماع إلى أهل الميت وصَنع الطعام من النياحةAs for the food, it is lawful in itself as food, but responding to the invitation and eating from it, given that it arises from a religious innovation (bid'ah) or wailing, is forbidden.
For this reason, I see that it is obligatory for you, O students, to clarify this to the people. Say to them: Why do you burden yourselves with a matter that only increases your distance from Allah? Where were the Companions and the Tabi'un regarding this practice?
Was it hidden from them and its knowledge reserved for you?
Or did they know of it but leave it?
All of this is impossible. So clarify this to the people and say: Do not say, "We found our fathers upon a nation, and we are following in their footsteps." The truth is established and remains until the Day of Resurrection.