Is it permissible to maintain family ties if they are committing wrongs?
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The questioner : In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
His EminenceThe Shaykh : A man has relatives whom he visits to maintain family ties. There are some of the widespread wrongs of this time in the homes of these relatives, and these wrongs do not cease whether he is present or not. What do you advise him to do in order to maintain this family tie?
The Shaykh : There is no doubt that maintaining family ties is an individual obligation, meaning: it is obligatory for every person to maintain his family ties, because severing family ties is among the major sins, as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1909Sahih (Darussalam).
However, if this man has relatives who commit these reprehensible things whether he is present or not, he should go to them, then advise them and warn them of Allah, and remind them of the days of Allah and the blessings of Allah. If they reform, that is what is desired. If they do not reform, he is excused from going to them, and it is sufficient for him to speak with them by telephone or correspond with them in writing.
He is excused in this case because if he goes to them, he must sit with them in the presence of a wrong. Whoever sits with a group in the presence of a wrong while he is able to leave them, he shares in the sin as they do, as Allah the Exalted said:[An-Nisa 4:140] He is excused in this situation, but he can maintain ties with them by telephone or in writing.
The questioner : His EminenceThe Shaykh : May Allah reward you. I have two questions if your eminence permits, one of them on behalf of someone else.
The Shaykh : No, we permit only one question, and if the brothers are finished.
His EminenceThe Shaykh : A man has relatives whom he visits to maintain family ties. There are some of the widespread wrongs of this time in the homes of these relatives, and these wrongs do not cease whether he is present or not. What do you advise him to do in order to maintain this family tie?
The Shaykh : There is no doubt that maintaining family ties is an individual obligation, meaning: it is obligatory for every person to maintain his family ties, because severing family ties is among the major sins, as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
The one who severs ties will not enter Paradise.
لا يدخل الجنة قاطعHowever, if this man has relatives who commit these reprehensible things whether he is present or not, he should go to them, then advise them and warn them of Allah, and remind them of the days of Allah and the blessings of Allah. If they reform, that is what is desired. If they do not reform, he is excused from going to them, and it is sufficient for him to speak with them by telephone or correspond with them in writing.
He is excused in this case because if he goes to them, he must sit with them in the presence of a wrong. Whoever sits with a group in the presence of a wrong while he is able to leave them, he shares in the sin as they do, as Allah the Exalted said:
And it has already come down to you in the Book that when you hear the verses of Allah [recited], they are denied [by them] and ridiculed; so do not sit with them until they enter into another conversation. Indeed, you would then be like them
وَقَدْ نَزَّلَ عَلَيْكُمْ فِي الْكِتَابِ أَنْ إِذَا سَمِعْتُمْ آيَاتِ اللَّهِ يُكْفَرُ بِهَا وَيُسْتَهْزَأُ بِهَا فَلا تَقْعُدُوا مَعَهُمْ حَتَّى يَخُوضُوا فِي حَدِيثٍ غَيْرِهِ إِنَّكُمْ إِذاً مِثْلُهُمْThe questioner : His EminenceThe Shaykh : May Allah reward you. I have two questions if your eminence permits, one of them on behalf of someone else.
The Shaykh : No, we permit only one question, and if the brothers are finished.