What is the ruling on holding a wedding feast after a woman has completed the waiting period following her husband's death, and what is the ruling on accepting the invitation in this case?
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The questioner : In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
Your Eminence, some people have recently become accustomed to the following: when a woman's husband dies and the period of four months and ten days—which is called the mourning period—has ended, her relatives hold a feast. Sometimes it is the son who hosts it, sometimes the sister, and sometimes someone else, and so on. What is the ruling on this practice? And if it has a connection to maintaining family ties, what is the ruling on accepting the invitation to attend these feasts?
The Shaykh : By Allah, what appears to me, if Allah wills, is that there is nothing wrong with it, because this is a customary matter, and they are not doing it as an act of worship. This is unlike the women of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance. The women of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance, when the year was completed—and the women of that time in the pre-Islamic age of ignorance observed a full year of mourning—would remain in the worst possible house and would not touch water. Even if she menstruated, she would not touch water or take a bath, so she would remain with a foul, unpleasant smell. And when she came out after a full year, she would take a piece of dung and throw it, saying: "It is as if everything that passed over me was easier for me than throwing this dung." As the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:As-Sunan al-Kubra lil-Nasa'i 31:149 Yes.
Now the time has ended because the call to prayer has been made. Whoever has a question, we will save it, if Allah wills, for the next session. And all praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds. May Allah send prayers and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions.
Your Eminence, some people have recently become accustomed to the following: when a woman's husband dies and the period of four months and ten days—which is called the mourning period—has ended, her relatives hold a feast. Sometimes it is the son who hosts it, sometimes the sister, and sometimes someone else, and so on. What is the ruling on this practice? And if it has a connection to maintaining family ties, what is the ruling on accepting the invitation to attend these feasts?
The Shaykh : By Allah, what appears to me, if Allah wills, is that there is nothing wrong with it, because this is a customary matter, and they are not doing it as an act of worship. This is unlike the women of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance. The women of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance, when the year was completed—and the women of that time in the pre-Islamic age of ignorance observed a full year of mourning—would remain in the worst possible house and would not touch water. Even if she menstruated, she would not touch water or take a bath, so she would remain with a foul, unpleasant smell. And when she came out after a full year, she would take a piece of dung and throw it, saying: "It is as if everything that passed over me was easier for me than throwing this dung." As the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
One of you used to throw dung on her head when the year was completed.
قد كانت إحداكن ترمي بالبَعرة على رأس الحولNow the time has ended because the call to prayer has been made. Whoever has a question, we will save it, if Allah wills, for the next session. And all praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds. May Allah send prayers and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions.