Explanation and benefits of the hadith: (Anas said: “I attended the wedding feast of Zaynab, and they fed the people bread and meat . . .”)

The Shaykh : In it, it is said: Anas said, “I attended the wedding feast of Zaynab, and they fed the people bread and meat.” By whom? By the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him). Here, the wedding feast of Zaynab differed from the wedding feast of Safiyyah. Safiyyah’s feast was *hais* (dates, dried yogurt, and ghee), whereas this one was meat and bread. This is because the wedding feast is to be according to what is available, as Allah the Exalted said: each according to his means. Likewise, the bridal gift is to be from each person according to his means. The bridal gift of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) for his wives was twelve *uqiyah* (a unit of weight). The man who told him that his bridal gift was four *uqiyah* was rebuked by him (peace and blessings be upon him). The point is that in such matters, a person should consider his circumstances and not burden himself with what he cannot bear. Indeed, it is reported in a hadith that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) forbade a man from humiliating himself. They asked, “How does a man humble himself?” He said, “By speaking of what he cannot fulfill.” This is the hadith or its meaning. And the truth of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) is: Beware of doing what leads to your humiliation, whether in actions or words. Refraining is better than rushing in, because if a person refrains, he remains in control; but if he rushes in, he is controlled and unable to back out. This is a principle that a person should follow in his life: do not rush in except where you see benefit in doing so. If the two options are equal, refraining is better. If refraining is stronger, then refraining is better. In it, it is also said: Two men lagged behind, and he (the Prophet) was pleased to converse with them, so they did not leave. But the verse was revealed: So Allah the Mighty and Majestic disciplined the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them) that when they finish eating, they do not sit. He said, “and not lingering in conversation.” Then He explained the reason by saying: From this reason, it is understood that if a person finishes eating at the home of his host and sits at the host’s desire, there is no harm in it. But what is the original ruling? The original ruling is to leave. Even in matters other than food, even if you are invited for coffee and tea and the coffee and tea are finished, it is better that you leave, so that you are light upon people and it is not said, “So-and-so, once he enters a house, does not leave unless he is sent out.” Keep yourself light. And ask for permission. Then, if the host asks you to stay and you see benefit in that, stay. But some people, may Allah reward them, if you invite them, even for coffee and tea, and they finish the coffee and tea, they spread out in conversation until you are tired of it, as if they are on your head. What is the benefit of this? There is no benefit. When the thing you were invited for is finished, ask for permission. And His saying (Blessed and Exalted is He): He did not say “it harms him” because it does not harm him, but he is distressed by it and does not like it. And in His saying: there is proof of the modesty of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). He was described as being more modest than a virgin in her chamber. So he (peace and blessings be upon him) possessed great modesty, but he does not shy away from the truth. And in His saying: there is the affirmation of modesty for Allah the Mighty and Majestic. In His saying, “And Allah does not shy away from the truth,” there is the affirmation of modesty for Allah the Mighty and Majestic. And something similar came in the Qur’an, so He the Exalted said: The point of inference is that if He does not shy away from the truth, it means that He the Mighty and Majestic does not speak falsehood, nor does He approve of falsehood. In it, there is also the establishment of the hijab, or the revelation of the hijab, in the sixth year of the Hijrah. This is the well-known view among the scholars, and that women before that did not observe hijab, but the hijab was revealed later. I mentioned to you that the hadiths regarding the permissibility of uncovering the face, if they are authentic, are to be understood as applying to what was before the obligation of hijab. And in His saying (the Exalted): We say: Are the houses of others like His houses? The answer is: Yes, by His saying (the Exalted): Yes.