Benefits of the Hadith: (When the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) married her, he stayed with her for three days . . .)

The Shaykh : In this hadith, there are benefits, one of which the author cited as his reason for mentioning it: that if a man stays with a previously married woman for three days, he gives her the choice.
Among its benefits is the good character of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), as he apologized to Umm Salimah. What did he apologize with, my dear?
The student: .

The Shaykh : This is an apology. We should follow his example. If we do an obligatory act that our kin are not pleased with, it is better that we apologize.
Among its benefits is that a person does not show favoritism to anyone in an obligatory matter, but he apologizes to them. He apologizes on his own behalf for implementing the obligatory command, because the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) did not show favoritism to Umm Salimah, but he clarified the obligation to her and apologized. So we take from this this great benefit: do not show favoritism to anyone in an obligatory matter, but apologize to them, or rather, apologize on their behalf for implementing the obligatory command.
Among the benefits of the hadith is that just as the wife is a relative, the husband is also a relative. The evidence that the husband is a relative is the saying of the Exalted and Majestic: . So the wife is undoubtedly a relative. Likewise, the husband is a relative to his wife.
Among the benefits of this hadith is that if the previously married woman chooses that he complete seven days for her, he must give seven days to his other wives. So if we assume he has three wives and marries a fourth, and she chooses that he give her seven days, when does he return to her?
After twenty-one days, because if he gives her seven days, he gives seven days to his other wives. He gives seven to the first, then the second, then the third. So that is twenty-one days, and then he returns to the rotation.
And I think a woman would not choose such a thing, unless her menstrual period was approaching. In that case, she might choose the seven days so that the husband is absent from her during her days of menstruation. But if the matter is normal, I do not think a woman would choose to have her husband absent from her for seven days in order to gain four days.
But in any case, the decision is hers.
Here is a question: Is this choice obligatory, or is it left to his will?
It appears that it is not obligatory, but rather it is left to the husband's will, because this is merely an action of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), and the default ruling for an action is that it is not obligatory. The default ruling for a mere action is that it is not obligatory.
And based on this, the husband may not choose to stay with this wife for seven days and be absent from his other wives for four days, for example. So is the choice here obligatory or not obligatory?
The student: It is not obligatory.

The Shaykh : It is not obligatory.
Another question: If someone says that extending the period to seven days causes harm to the other wives, does he need to consult them by saying to them: "The rotation for you is from the fourth night, but do you permit me to stay with her for seven days, and the rotation begins from the second night, or is it not obligatory for him?"
The apparent meaning of the hadith is that it is not obligatory, but this reduction or deprivation of the rights of the women is compensated. How is it compensated?
By giving them a full seven days, otherwise the initial impression is that if he gives her seven days, he gives four days to his other wives. Are you with me?
The student: Yes.

The Shaykh : Why?
Because three days are her right, but the fact that he did not seek their permission and stayed with her for seven days is compensated by an increase of four days over the obligatory amount. This is compensated by what? By increasing their share, by giving each one seven days. And this is justice, because someone might say:
Why does he give seven days to his wives when he only added four days for the new one? Should not justice require that he give the others four days?
We say: This is justice at first glance, but upon reflection, it becomes clear that justice is what the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said. How?
Because when he deprived them of part of their right by extending the period of his absence from them, he compensated for that by increasing their share, by giving them seven days.
In summary: The summary of the two hadiths is that whoever marries a virgin while having a previously married wife stays with her for seven days, and whoever marries a previously married woman while having a virgin or a previously married wife stays with her for three days, and he has the right to give her the choice of what?
That he give her seven days and give seven days to his other wives, otherwise she is limited to three days.
In this hadith, there is a benefit: informing a person of the actual situation, because he said: . So he informed her frankly, and did not leave the matter vague, but he clarified and made it clear. And thus a person should be clear and frank in all his affairs.
Did you not know that the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said regarding the two who sell: .