Explanation of the Book of Marriage-08
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The Shaykh : Now, and from Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her), she said: Bulugh al-Maram 8:38 His statement: means: once, then once, then once. It is not intended that he said: "You are divorced three times," because "You are divorced three times" in the time of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) is not counted as more than one. But whenever a divorce comes to you, or he divorced her three times, the meaning is: one after the other. For this reason, in this hadith or others, there are multiple wordings: he divorced her with three divorces, explicitly. The important thing is that he divorced her one after the other.
Bulugh al-Maram 8:38 means before he had intercourse with her, Bulugh al-Maram 8:38 Agreed upon by al-Bukhari and Muslim, and the wording is from Muslim.
This was previously mentioned, and that the second husband must have intercourse with the wife. If he contracted marriage with her and was alone with her without having intercourse with her, and then divorced her, she does not become lawful for the first husband.
And his statement: Is the sweetness the emission of semen or just intercourse?
The student: The second.
The Shaykh : The correct answer: It is just intercourse, and she becomes lawful for the first husband even if emission does not occur, because intercourse itself, as the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: But with emission, there is no doubt that it is more complete.
And based on this, we say: She does not become lawful for the first husband until what? The second husband has intercourse with her. If he divorced her before having intercourse with her, even if he was alone with her, or kissed her, or embraced her, or the like, she does not become lawful for the first husband. Interourse is necessary.
Now, there remains an issue in this: Is the criterion the intention of the wife, or the intention of the husband, or the intention of the guardian? The jurists said: "Whoever does not have the power of divorce in his hand, his intention has no effect".
The student: For the husband.
The Shaykh : The criterion is the intention of the husband, because he is the one who has the power of divorce in his hand. If she intended that when he releases her to the first husband, she returns to the first, it is not in her hand. If she says to the husband: "Divorce me," he says: "No." So the criterion is the intention of the husband. And some scholars said: Rather, it is her intention or the husband's intention. As for the criterion being the husband's intention, the matter is clear, because he is the one who has the marriage contract in his hand. And as for her intention being considered, it is because she may strive to what? To have the husband separate from her by any means, right? Can the wife strive until the husband divorces her?
The student: Yes.
The Shaykh : What do you do?
The student: She makes his life difficult.
The Shaykh : She makes his life difficult if he says: "Make tea," she makes milk, and vice versa, or "Milk is better, okay, make milk," she makes tea.
The student: ...
The Shaykh : Or she does nothing at all, yes, whenever he orders her, she says no. Likewise, in the bedroom, she tires him, yes, this also may force the husband to divorce her. Sometimes some women challenge their husband, saying to him: "Are you a man?" He says: "Yes, I am more of a man than you." She says: "If you are a man, divorce me." A problem takes him, his pride flares up, his blood boils, so he may divorce her. Likewise, the man may have a need, meaning he is in debt or the like, and she says: "I will give you more than what I gave you, divorce me."
In any case: This opinion is very sound if we know that this wife's intention is bad and that she made life difficult for the husband until he divorced her so she could return to the first. We should prevent her from him, because she wanted the first husband in a forbidden way, because it is not lawful for her to disobey her husband or be difficult regarding his rights. She is punished with what? With deprivation. She is punished with deprivation, and we say: Now she does not become lawful for the first husband. Now she may cry for the second husband, is that not so? Meaning, if the judge were good and said: "That's it, you no longer become lawful for the first husband, because we know from your behavior that you want the first and you want the release, so now you do not become lawful for the first." In my belief, she will cry for the second and try to return to him. Perhaps when she comes to the second, he says to her: "You wasted the milk in summer" There is nothing, and at that time she remains suspended. We ask Allah for safety.
In any case: The original rule is that the intention is whose? The husband's intention, because he is the one who has the power of divorce in his hand. But the opinion that it returns to the wife's intention is a very strong opinion, yes.
A man divorced his wife by three pronouncements and another man married her
طلق رجل امرأته ثلاثا، فتزوجها رجلDivorced his wife
طلق امرأتهand another man married her and divorced her before cohabiting with her
فتزوجها رجل ثم طلقها قبل أن يدخل بهاThen, her first husband intended to remarry her and asked Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) about that. He said, "No, until the other one (second husband) has enjoyed sexual intercourse with her as the first (husband) had."
فأراد زوجها الأول أن يتزوجها ، فسئل رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم عن ذلك فقال: لا حتى يذوق الآخر من عسيلتها ما ذاق الأولThis was previously mentioned, and that the second husband must have intercourse with the wife. If he contracted marriage with her and was alone with her without having intercourse with her, and then divorced her, she does not become lawful for the first husband.
And his statement:
Of her sweetness
من عسيلتهاThe student: The second.
The Shaykh : The correct answer: It is just intercourse, and she becomes lawful for the first husband even if emission does not occur, because intercourse itself, as the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
Sweetness
عسيلةAnd based on this, we say: She does not become lawful for the first husband until what? The second husband has intercourse with her. If he divorced her before having intercourse with her, even if he was alone with her, or kissed her, or embraced her, or the like, she does not become lawful for the first husband. Interourse is necessary.
Now, there remains an issue in this: Is the criterion the intention of the wife, or the intention of the husband, or the intention of the guardian? The jurists said: "Whoever does not have the power of divorce in his hand, his intention has no effect".
The student: For the husband.
The Shaykh : The criterion is the intention of the husband, because he is the one who has the power of divorce in his hand. If she intended that when he releases her to the first husband, she returns to the first, it is not in her hand. If she says to the husband: "Divorce me," he says: "No." So the criterion is the intention of the husband. And some scholars said: Rather, it is her intention or the husband's intention. As for the criterion being the husband's intention, the matter is clear, because he is the one who has the marriage contract in his hand. And as for her intention being considered, it is because she may strive to what? To have the husband separate from her by any means, right? Can the wife strive until the husband divorces her?
The student: Yes.
The Shaykh : What do you do?
The student: She makes his life difficult.
The Shaykh : She makes his life difficult if he says: "Make tea," she makes milk, and vice versa, or "Milk is better, okay, make milk," she makes tea.
The student: ...
The Shaykh : Or she does nothing at all, yes, whenever he orders her, she says no. Likewise, in the bedroom, she tires him, yes, this also may force the husband to divorce her. Sometimes some women challenge their husband, saying to him: "Are you a man?" He says: "Yes, I am more of a man than you." She says: "If you are a man, divorce me." A problem takes him, his pride flares up, his blood boils, so he may divorce her. Likewise, the man may have a need, meaning he is in debt or the like, and she says: "I will give you more than what I gave you, divorce me."
In any case: This opinion is very sound if we know that this wife's intention is bad and that she made life difficult for the husband until he divorced her so she could return to the first. We should prevent her from him, because she wanted the first husband in a forbidden way, because it is not lawful for her to disobey her husband or be difficult regarding his rights. She is punished with what? With deprivation. She is punished with deprivation, and we say: Now she does not become lawful for the first husband. Now she may cry for the second husband, is that not so? Meaning, if the judge were good and said: "That's it, you no longer become lawful for the first husband, because we know from your behavior that you want the first and you want the release, so now you do not become lawful for the first." In my belief, she will cry for the second and try to return to him. Perhaps when she comes to the second, he says to her: "You wasted the milk in summer" There is nothing, and at that time she remains suspended. We ask Allah for safety.
In any case: The original rule is that the intention is whose? The husband's intention, because he is the one who has the power of divorce in his hand. But the opinion that it returns to the wife's intention is a very strong opinion, yes.