My husband asks me to have intercourse with him from behind—meaning: from the anus—and I refuse that
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The questioner : A female questioner says, "May your excellence...The Shaykh : I ask for an answer to this question, because it is important to me. It worries me. My husband asks me to have intercourse with him from behind, meaning: from the anus. And I refuse that. And he forces me to do it to the extent that I cry and refuse, but he forces me to do this thing. I ask for guidance, may Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : First: I advise this questioner, if she wants to submit this question, not to submit it like this in public, because this, and praise be to Allah, is not present. It does not exist, except perhaps one in a million. And raising such a question in this society opens the door. Then it is also, in my opinion, contrary to modesty. That a woman narrates about her husband this. If she had called me or another of the scholars of knowledge in this matter, either by telephone or by a message she sends, it would have been better.
In any case, we clarify the ruling in this: Intercourse with a woman in her anus is from the major sins, until the severe warning came regarding it. The warning of disbelief came. And the warning of cursing came. And this was named: the lesser sodomy. And the texts in this are many. And what was mentioned from some of the Salaf that they permitted it is an error upon them, as Ibn al-Qayyim mentioned in Zad al-Ma'ad, and others. And they only intended to come to her in the vagina from the side of the anus. And this is permissible, there is no harm in it. That a person has intercourse with his wife in her vagina, but from behind. Coming to her from behind, this is not a problem, due to the saying of the Exalted:[Al-Baqarah 2:223].
As for having intercourse with her in the anus, no.
And here is an issue: Some people think that if he does this, meaning: comes to his wife from the anus, the marriage is annulled. And it is not so. The marriage remains. But if he repeats and continues, it is obligatory to separate between them. Meaning: between the woman and her husband who does this act. And as for her, she must prevent herself from him to the extent of ability.
So my advice first to the husbands: That they fear Allah Mighty and Majestic in themselves and in their wives, and that they do not expose themselves to punishment. And my advice to the wives: That they refrain from this absolutely. Even if that leads to leaving the house to her family. Let her do so and not stay with this husband. And she in this state is not defiant, because she fled from disobedience. And she in this state also has the right to financial maintenance from her husband. If she stays with her family for a month or two, she can demand maintenance from him, because the injustice is from her or from him? From him, because it is not permissible for him to force her to this matter.
Yes.
The Shaykh : First: I advise this questioner, if she wants to submit this question, not to submit it like this in public, because this, and praise be to Allah, is not present. It does not exist, except perhaps one in a million. And raising such a question in this society opens the door. Then it is also, in my opinion, contrary to modesty. That a woman narrates about her husband this. If she had called me or another of the scholars of knowledge in this matter, either by telephone or by a message she sends, it would have been better.
In any case, we clarify the ruling in this: Intercourse with a woman in her anus is from the major sins, until the severe warning came regarding it. The warning of disbelief came. And the warning of cursing came. And this was named: the lesser sodomy. And the texts in this are many. And what was mentioned from some of the Salaf that they permitted it is an error upon them, as Ibn al-Qayyim mentioned in Zad al-Ma'ad, and others. And they only intended to come to her in the vagina from the side of the anus. And this is permissible, there is no harm in it. That a person has intercourse with his wife in her vagina, but from behind. Coming to her from behind, this is not a problem, due to the saying of the Exalted:
Your wives are a place of sowing of seed for you, so come to your place of cultivation however you wish
نِسَاؤُكُمْ حَرْثٌ لَكُمْ فَأْتُوا حَرْثَكُمْ أَنَّى شِئْتُمْAs for having intercourse with her in the anus, no.
And here is an issue: Some people think that if he does this, meaning: comes to his wife from the anus, the marriage is annulled. And it is not so. The marriage remains. But if he repeats and continues, it is obligatory to separate between them. Meaning: between the woman and her husband who does this act. And as for her, she must prevent herself from him to the extent of ability.
So my advice first to the husbands: That they fear Allah Mighty and Majestic in themselves and in their wives, and that they do not expose themselves to punishment. And my advice to the wives: That they refrain from this absolutely. Even if that leads to leaving the house to her family. Let her do so and not stay with this husband. And she in this state is not defiant, because she fled from disobedience. And she in this state also has the right to financial maintenance from her husband. If she stays with her family for a month or two, she can demand maintenance from him, because the injustice is from her or from him? From him, because it is not permissible for him to force her to this matter.
Yes.