I live in America and I have been committed for a year and a half, praise be to Allah, but my wife is American and says that she has embraced Islam, but she is not committed and does not wish to

The Shaykh: And upon you peace.

The questioner : I am speaking to you from America.

The Shaykh : May Allah deliver you from America.

The questioner : May Allah deliver me, if Allah wills. I have a question, or perhaps more than one question, regarding the situation I am personally living in. I want to know the ruling of the Shari'ah on this matter. The situation is that I have been in America for about twenty years. I got married and have children. By the grace of Allah, we were not guided until a year and a half ago, praise be to Allah. Allah guided one of us and I became committed. We are trying to learn the religion and learn to be committed, and at the same time, we are trying to correct the past as much as possible. My wife says that she has embraced Islam, but in reality, for a year and a half, I have not seen any commitment from her, nor any desire to learn, nor any help in religious matters regarding the children. One is always busy here, so one expects some help, but there is nothing from her. The situation is difficult for me, because one can fulfill his duties, but without help, things become harder.

The Shaykh: Yes.

The questioner : So the question we want to know is, what can we do according to the Shari'ah? What should we do?

The Shaykh : As for what you want to do, I have already given you the answer: May Allah deliver you from America. And unfortunately, Muslims do not think about the future of their lives. One of them travels to America, Germany, or France and secures his material life, even if that leads to the ruin of his hereafter. Now, you have encountered what you sought before without looking at the consequences. It was said long ago: "He who does not look at the consequences is not a companion of the world." Now, what will come of your hand? You have settled and planted roots in America and married an American woman. American women, like all Western women, are very, very rarely chaste, modest, and religious in morals. I am not talking about Islamic morals, but even the old Christian morals. Christian women used to cover themselves, almost like Muslim women. Now, tabarruj (display of adornment), fornication, and zina (unlawful sexual intercourse) are prevalent in every land of disbelief and misguidance. You did what you did, so as I told you when I first said I was speaking to you from America, I told you: May Allah deliver you from America. You will say to me, how can I get out of this when I have a wife and a son or sons? And you will say they do not allow me to take the children. Yes, there is... My brother, you have spilled the milk. I am telling you the Shari'ah ruling: Can you flee to Allah? If you cannot, what can I do for you?

The questioner : The children, if I do this, there is a strong possibility that neither the wife nor the children will come.

The Shaykh : I know what I am telling you. I am telling you this. So now, you must give your wife the final warning, and she may not respond to you, as I understood from you that she is not committed. So, save yourself, as the Lord of the Worlds said in the Noble Qur'an: If you can, flee to Allah, you and your wife and your children, then good. You and your children, then good. No, no wife or child, save yourselves before you are caught by surprise by something you did not expect.

The questioner : Well, what is my responsibility before Allah regarding the children? This is the thing I am most afraid of, more than anything else.

The Shaykh : You should have been afraid of this, my brother, before you went to America and before you married an American woman. But after you brought this evil upon yourself with your own hand, it is like one who seeks a chronic illness, and then the illness becomes chronic, like one who uses narcotics. How does he want to get rid of it? He has to do it by force to get rid of it. In short, do what you can to save yourself and your offspring, or some of your offspring, or else save yourself. And this is enough, and praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds.