Is there a word that clarifies the most important evils that occur in celebrations and must be removed?
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The questioner : May Allah reward the honorableThe Shaykh : What is also common during this vacation is the abundance of joyful celebrations, but they are marred by some gloom. We ask you, may Allah reward you, to point out the most important evils that Muslims must avoid?
The Shaykh : He means by celebrations, i.e., weddings, that they usually increase during vacation days. These weddings have a prescribed method and a forbidden method. As for the prescribed method, it is announcing the marriage, because the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) ordered the announcement of the marriage. Among the ways of announcing the marriage are the palaces where people now get married; they are evident by their chandeliers, their opening, and so on. This is part of the announcement. Also part of the announcement is beating the hand drum and permissible singing. This is for the women; there is no blame on women singing and beating the hand drum, but the singing must be modest, meaning it contains no error in the subject of the song or in its performance, such that it contains no obscene speech, no romantic speech, and is not performed as it is performed, yes, and not with melodies like those of singers, but with appropriate melodies. In this case, we also say: keep the women away from the men, in a distant place, whether roofed or otherwise. It is not permissible to broadcast their voices through the loudspeaker, i.e., through the microphone, because that is a nuisance to the neighbors and a cause of fitnah (trial, discord or temptation). Some women may have a beautiful voice that men enjoy, especially the young men. So let the celebration with singing and hand drums be in the middle of a roofed place, or in a separate place, but far from the men, and without prominent voices.
As for the forbidden things, as happens with some foolish people, some women or some young boys carry cameras with them and photograph the women's party, so the pictures of the women remain a toy in the hands of the foolish. And worse than that is filming the party on video tapes, then distributing it everywhere; you find it in the hands of the foolish, sold or given as a gift or the like.
Also among the forbidden things is that some people, and they are few, praise be to Allah, have the husband attend the party place and sit with his wife on the platform, and perhaps he kisses her in front of the women. We ask Allah for safety. This is a terrible sight and an arousal of desire. Also, in the husband's presence, there is a harm that if the wife and her family were to notice it, they would deny it strongly. What is the harm? It is known that the husband has married and come to this place, happy and pleased, and sees that his wife is among the best of women. If he sits in front of the women, and there are young women more beautiful and better than his wife, it causes a shock to the husband, and he hates his wife whom he came to see as one of the most beautiful women. So among the daughters of Adam, there are those who are much better than his wife, and at that time he turns away from his wife and becomes troubled, and his mind is attached to the woman he saw who is more beautiful than his wife. Therefore, we see that this, in addition to being forbidden, is a cause of distance between the husband and his new wife.
Also among the forbidden things is that some people send small boys to take pictures of the women. This is different from the first issue. The first issue: I said that the women themselves carry cameras and take pictures. This is sending small boys, whom the gatekeeper does not stop because they are small, but they have cameras and photograph the women, then they bring these pictures to the men who sent them. This is undoubtedly an evil, a great evil.
Among the forbidden things is making many feasts for a small number of people, and then people do not benefit from these feasts. Undoubtedly, this is extravagance which Allah has forbidden. He, Glorified and Exalted is He, said:[Al-A'raf 7:31]. A person must remember that among the sons of Adam, among his Muslim brothers in other countries, there are those who do not find a piece of bread. How is he to be so arrogant and make these many feasts from which no one benefits afterwards? If they are benefited from, the matter is easier, but if they are loaded into cars and thrown in the desert, this is a great error, and it is feared that blessings will be removed by such actions. Yes.
The Shaykh : He means by celebrations, i.e., weddings, that they usually increase during vacation days. These weddings have a prescribed method and a forbidden method. As for the prescribed method, it is announcing the marriage, because the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) ordered the announcement of the marriage. Among the ways of announcing the marriage are the palaces where people now get married; they are evident by their chandeliers, their opening, and so on. This is part of the announcement. Also part of the announcement is beating the hand drum and permissible singing. This is for the women; there is no blame on women singing and beating the hand drum, but the singing must be modest, meaning it contains no error in the subject of the song or in its performance, such that it contains no obscene speech, no romantic speech, and is not performed as it is performed, yes, and not with melodies like those of singers, but with appropriate melodies. In this case, we also say: keep the women away from the men, in a distant place, whether roofed or otherwise. It is not permissible to broadcast their voices through the loudspeaker, i.e., through the microphone, because that is a nuisance to the neighbors and a cause of fitnah (trial, discord or temptation). Some women may have a beautiful voice that men enjoy, especially the young men. So let the celebration with singing and hand drums be in the middle of a roofed place, or in a separate place, but far from the men, and without prominent voices.
As for the forbidden things, as happens with some foolish people, some women or some young boys carry cameras with them and photograph the women's party, so the pictures of the women remain a toy in the hands of the foolish. And worse than that is filming the party on video tapes, then distributing it everywhere; you find it in the hands of the foolish, sold or given as a gift or the like.
Also among the forbidden things is that some people, and they are few, praise be to Allah, have the husband attend the party place and sit with his wife on the platform, and perhaps he kisses her in front of the women. We ask Allah for safety. This is a terrible sight and an arousal of desire. Also, in the husband's presence, there is a harm that if the wife and her family were to notice it, they would deny it strongly. What is the harm? It is known that the husband has married and come to this place, happy and pleased, and sees that his wife is among the best of women. If he sits in front of the women, and there are young women more beautiful and better than his wife, it causes a shock to the husband, and he hates his wife whom he came to see as one of the most beautiful women. So among the daughters of Adam, there are those who are much better than his wife, and at that time he turns away from his wife and becomes troubled, and his mind is attached to the woman he saw who is more beautiful than his wife. Therefore, we see that this, in addition to being forbidden, is a cause of distance between the husband and his new wife.
Also among the forbidden things is that some people send small boys to take pictures of the women. This is different from the first issue. The first issue: I said that the women themselves carry cameras and take pictures. This is sending small boys, whom the gatekeeper does not stop because they are small, but they have cameras and photograph the women, then they bring these pictures to the men who sent them. This is undoubtedly an evil, a great evil.
Among the forbidden things is making many feasts for a small number of people, and then people do not benefit from these feasts. Undoubtedly, this is extravagance which Allah has forbidden. He, Glorified and Exalted is He, said: