When must a woman veil herself from her children?
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The Shaykh : Here is a question. The questioner asks: When must a woman veil herself from young boys?
The answer to this question requires an introduction and a preamble. I believe that the majority of Muslims today are either ignorant of this or neglect it. The Noble Qur'an explicitly states that a Muslim woman is not permitted to display her hidden adornment except to her father and her mahrams, let alone her husband. People today do not observe this legal ruling. Women expose their chests, necks, and arms before brothers and sisters, and perhaps before non-mahram relatives such as cousins or maternal uncles, and the like. We must know that a Muslim woman, with regard to non-mahrams—even if they are relatives—is not permitted to appear before them except as she appears before a stranger, meaning with only her face and hands. This is if she wishes to take a dispensation and adopt the permissibility. Otherwise, the more complete state for her is also not to show her face before strangers. Accordingly, a woman is not permitted to appear before what they call her "salf" (her sister's husband). She is not permitted to appear before her sister's husband except as she appears before any stranger. This is what the verse[An-Nur 24:31] conveys. The first adornment is visible adornment, and the scholars have differed greatly on it. The stronger position is that it is the face and hands, as we mentioned. As for the other adornment, [An-Nur 24:31] to the end of the verse, it is hidden adornment. It is what a woman is accustomed to being lenient and taking a dispensation in displaying while in her own home, such as the arms, for example, or the lower half of the legs, and the like. This hidden adornment is not permissible for a Muslim woman to display except before mahrams.
Once we understand this preamble, the answer to this question is: When must a woman veil herself before small children who have not reached puberty, i.e., the age of legal accountability?
The answer to this question is that a small boy or young child has two conditions:
The first condition is that he is a boy at a time when he has not reached the age of legal accountability. He has two states. The first state is that he is a boy and a normal child, meaning his sexual desire has not been stirred. In this state, it is permissible for a Muslim woman to appear before him as she appears before mahrams, and not more than that.
However, if the boy, despite not having reached the age of legal accountability, shows signs that he has come to know what is there regarding sex, as they say today, and that he may speak, wink, touch, and the like, then in that case, this boy should be treated as one who has reached the age of legal accountability, despite not having reached it, by way of blocking the means to harm. This is because he is one who has seen the private parts of women, even though the original rule, as we said, is the age of legal accountability.
This is the answer to this question. We must pay great attention to this issue because people have neglected it completely, except for those whom Allah protects, and they are few. You hardly find a Muslim home where this legal aspect is observed. For example, a mother covers herself and veils herself with the obligatory veil before her daughter. The mother enters the bathroom and perhaps takes a full ritual bath, with her entire upper body exposed before her adult, mature daughter, on the excuse that there is no stranger present and she is her daughter. This is a great error. It is not permissible for a daughter to see the private parts of a woman. We know that the private parts of a woman, with regard to all mahrams, male or female, there is no difference in that. The entire woman is a private part, except the neck where the collar is, and the arms when she is compelled to expose them to perform ablution in her home, and otherwise, a part of the lower legs. This is all that is permissible for a woman to be lenient in displaying before her mahrams, including children, whether male or female. Accordingly, it is not permissible for a woman to bring her adult daughter into the bathroom with her on the excuse that she will scrub her back, because the mother's back is a private part with regard to the daughter. This is what many people are ignorant of, and the few who know this ruling are lenient and negligent about it. This is a reminder, and the reminder benefits the believers.
The answer to this question requires an introduction and a preamble. I believe that the majority of Muslims today are either ignorant of this or neglect it. The Noble Qur'an explicitly states that a Muslim woman is not permitted to display her hidden adornment except to her father and her mahrams, let alone her husband. People today do not observe this legal ruling. Women expose their chests, necks, and arms before brothers and sisters, and perhaps before non-mahram relatives such as cousins or maternal uncles, and the like. We must know that a Muslim woman, with regard to non-mahrams—even if they are relatives—is not permitted to appear before them except as she appears before a stranger, meaning with only her face and hands. This is if she wishes to take a dispensation and adopt the permissibility. Otherwise, the more complete state for her is also not to show her face before strangers. Accordingly, a woman is not permitted to appear before what they call her "salf" (her sister's husband). She is not permitted to appear before her sister's husband except as she appears before any stranger. This is what the verse
not expose their adornment except that which [necessarily] appears thereof and to wrap [a portion of] their headcovers over their chests and not expose their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands' fathers, their sons
وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا ...َ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ آَبَائِهِنَّ أَوْ آَبَاءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَائِهِنَّ ...except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands' fathers, their sons
وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ آَبَائِهِنَّ أَوْ آَبَاءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَائِهِنَّOnce we understand this preamble, the answer to this question is: When must a woman veil herself before small children who have not reached puberty, i.e., the age of legal accountability?
The answer to this question is that a small boy or young child has two conditions:
The first condition is that he is a boy at a time when he has not reached the age of legal accountability. He has two states. The first state is that he is a boy and a normal child, meaning his sexual desire has not been stirred. In this state, it is permissible for a Muslim woman to appear before him as she appears before mahrams, and not more than that.
However, if the boy, despite not having reached the age of legal accountability, shows signs that he has come to know what is there regarding sex, as they say today, and that he may speak, wink, touch, and the like, then in that case, this boy should be treated as one who has reached the age of legal accountability, despite not having reached it, by way of blocking the means to harm. This is because he is one who has seen the private parts of women, even though the original rule, as we said, is the age of legal accountability.
This is the answer to this question. We must pay great attention to this issue because people have neglected it completely, except for those whom Allah protects, and they are few. You hardly find a Muslim home where this legal aspect is observed. For example, a mother covers herself and veils herself with the obligatory veil before her daughter. The mother enters the bathroom and perhaps takes a full ritual bath, with her entire upper body exposed before her adult, mature daughter, on the excuse that there is no stranger present and she is her daughter. This is a great error. It is not permissible for a daughter to see the private parts of a woman. We know that the private parts of a woman, with regard to all mahrams, male or female, there is no difference in that. The entire woman is a private part, except the neck where the collar is, and the arms when she is compelled to expose them to perform ablution in her home, and otherwise, a part of the lower legs. This is all that is permissible for a woman to be lenient in displaying before her mahrams, including children, whether male or female. Accordingly, it is not permissible for a woman to bring her adult daughter into the bathroom with her on the excuse that she will scrub her back, because the mother's back is a private part with regard to the daughter. This is what many people are ignorant of, and the few who know this ruling are lenient and negligent about it. This is a reminder, and the reminder benefits the believers.