A woman breastfed a child who was four and a half years old many times. Does her son thereby become a foster son, or not?

The questioner : May Allah reward you. The questioner says: “Respected Shaykh, a woman breastfed a child who was four and a half years old many times. Does her son thereby become a foster son, or not?” May Allah reward you with good.

The Shaykh : Four years?

The questioner : ... .

The Shaykh : Do you mean she breastfed him every year?

The questioner : ... .

The Shaykh : Do you mean that after he had reached four and a half years old, she breastfed him? This depends on whether breastfeeding an older person has an effect or not. Some people, some scholars, hold that breastfeeding an older person has an effect, just like breastfeeding a young child. They say that if a woman breastfeeds a person who is fifteen, thirty, forty, or older, or even older than she is, she becomes his mother. It is possible for a woman who is thirty to breastfeed a man who is, say, forty, and she would become his mother. This is based on the generality of the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and the generality of the saying of Allah the Exalted . As for how she breastfeeds him? There is no harm. As for how she breastfeeds him? This is a valid question. She can milk for him into a pot, yes, heat it on the fire, and give it to him. It is possible to do this five times, and then she would become his mother. In fact, some of those who hold this view say that a single breastfeeding is sufficient. But this view is weak. The correct view is what is indicated by the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) , meaning that the breastfeeding that has an effect is that which satisfies the hunger of the one being breastfed. It is well known that for one who has been weaned, what satisfies his hunger is food, eating and drinking, not the milk of a woman. Therefore, the correct view is that if a person reaches an age where he is independent of food and drink, which is usually two years, or if he is actually weaned from food and drink and sustains himself on food and drink—meaning he is actually weaned from milk and sustains himself on food and drink—then breastfeeding has no effect on him. Based on this, the answer to the question is that if a woman breastfeeds a person who has reached four and a half years, he does not become her son. This is the stronger opinion in this matter.

The questioner : May Allah reward you. This questioner says.

The Shaykh : It is obligatory for a student of knowledge to raise an objection to this, and that is in the story of Salim, the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfah. Abu Hudhayfah had adopted Salim and made him his son, and this was before the abolition of adoption. This man would enter the house and leave as if he were a son, because Abu Hudhayfah had adopted him and placed him in the position of a son. When Allah abolished adoption in His saying , the wife of Abu Hudhayfah came to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) and said, “O Messenger of Allah, ” meaning that we do not feel shy of him, based on the fact that he was the son of Abu Hudhayfah. meaning by its abolition. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, and the man was an adult. Does this indicate that breastfeeding an older person is like breastfeeding a young child?
The answer to that is: We say that if a situation arises like the situation of Abu Salim, then breastfeeding an older person is permissible. If it does not arise, it is not permissible. Is it possible for a situation like that of Salim, the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfah, to arise?
The student: It is not possible.

The Shaykh : Why is it not possible?
The student: ... .

The Shaykh : Because adoption has been abolished. It is abolished now, so it is not possible for a situation like that of Salim, the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfah, to arise. Yes.

The questioner : May Allah reward you with good. Respected Shaykh, a questioner says.

The Shaykh : There is also clear evidence that breastfeeding an older person has no effect. It is that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, . If breastfeeding an older person were beneficial, the in-law would have said, “Let your wife breastfeed him,” and the concern would have been removed. But when he said, “The in-law is death,” and warned against it, it is known that breastfeeding an older person has no effect.