The Reality of the Prohibited Shighar
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Question:
My father, my uncle, and my wife’s father agreed when my father proposed to them that my father would pay whatever amount the father of any daughter my son wanted would ask for. However, my son did not like any of the daughters, so my father asked me to marry my sister. My father agreed, and we went and performed the marriage contract. My father paid ten thousand riyals to the bride’s father. Likewise, my uncle and his son came, and his son performed the marriage contract with my sister, and he also paid the same amount. A year after the marriage contract, my father asked one of the scholars, and he informed him that it is not permissible and is called shighar, but that each one should pay his wife an agreed-upon mahr. I paid my wife five thousand riyals before the wedding, and my cousin also paid his wife the same amount. Is this marriage shighar or not? Please inform us, may Allah reward you with good.
Answer:
Shighar is when the contract is conditioned between the contracting parties. One says, “Marry me,” and the other says, “Marry me, and I will marry you.” Each one conditions the other. So, if your father and your uncle conditioned this contract, then this is shighar.
However, if your father proposed your uncle’s daughter for you and her father did not condition anything, or if her father proposed from your side and you did not condition anything, then there is no harm. But if there was a mutual condition between the father and the uncle, where they agreed that he would marry you his daughter and your father would marry his son his daughter, this is the prohibited shighar. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) prohibited shighar in several hadiths, saying: This is shighar.
However, if this one proposed to that one without a condition, and then the other proposed afterwards at any time without a condition, then it does not harm and it is not shighar except through mutual conditioning and agreement. You are more aware of the reality. So, if your father and your uncle mutually conditioned and agreed on the actual matter, that he would marry you and your father would marry his son, and that this is necessary, then this is shighar, and the contract is invalid.
And each of you must renew the contract if he has a desire for her and she has a desire for him. He renews the contract, a Shari'ah contract with her consent, without the condition of the other woman. Each one has her own consent... her own desire without a condition. So he renews the contract with a new mahr, a new contract, and two witnesses, if each one desires the other without the condition of the other woman. And Allah is the One who grants success. Yes.
The presenter: And Allah is the One who grants success. May Allah reward you with good.
My father, my uncle, and my wife’s father agreed when my father proposed to them that my father would pay whatever amount the father of any daughter my son wanted would ask for. However, my son did not like any of the daughters, so my father asked me to marry my sister. My father agreed, and we went and performed the marriage contract. My father paid ten thousand riyals to the bride’s father. Likewise, my uncle and his son came, and his son performed the marriage contract with my sister, and he also paid the same amount. A year after the marriage contract, my father asked one of the scholars, and he informed him that it is not permissible and is called shighar, but that each one should pay his wife an agreed-upon mahr. I paid my wife five thousand riyals before the wedding, and my cousin also paid his wife the same amount. Is this marriage shighar or not? Please inform us, may Allah reward you with good.
Answer:
Shighar is when the contract is conditioned between the contracting parties. One says, “Marry me,” and the other says, “Marry me, and I will marry you.” Each one conditions the other. So, if your father and your uncle conditioned this contract, then this is shighar.
However, if your father proposed your uncle’s daughter for you and her father did not condition anything, or if her father proposed from your side and you did not condition anything, then there is no harm. But if there was a mutual condition between the father and the uncle, where they agreed that he would marry you his daughter and your father would marry his son his daughter, this is the prohibited shighar. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) prohibited shighar in several hadiths, saying:
And shighar is when a man says, “Marry me your daughter, and I will marry you my daughter,” or “Marry me your sister, and I will marry you my sister.”
والشغار أن يقول الرجل: زوجني ابنتك، وأزوجك ابنتي، أو زوجني أختك، وأزوجك أختيHowever, if this one proposed to that one without a condition, and then the other proposed afterwards at any time without a condition, then it does not harm and it is not shighar except through mutual conditioning and agreement. You are more aware of the reality. So, if your father and your uncle mutually conditioned and agreed on the actual matter, that he would marry you and your father would marry his son, and that this is necessary, then this is shighar, and the contract is invalid.
And each of you must renew the contract if he has a desire for her and she has a desire for him. He renews the contract, a Shari'ah contract with her consent, without the condition of the other woman. Each one has her own consent... her own desire without a condition. So he renews the contract with a new mahr, a new contract, and two witnesses, if each one desires the other without the condition of the other woman. And Allah is the One who grants success. Yes.
The presenter: And Allah is the One who grants success. May Allah reward you with good.
Source
binbaz.org.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.