The ruling on a woman observing mourning for her husband beyond the waiting period
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
Question:
This is a question from Umm Khalid, from Tarif in the Northern Region. She says: My father passed away about two years ago, but the problem is with his wife, who is my mother. Her grief over him has continued, perhaps until this very moment, which has led her to refuse to change her black clothing or to adorn herself in any way, not even by applying kohl to her eyes or henna. We have done everything we can to convince her to abandon this mournful appearance, but to no avail. We ask you to clarify what is prescribed in this matter.
May Allah reward you with the best reward.
Answer:
This is not permissible. It is not permissible for her to remain in her grief or in the clothing of mourning. It is obligatory for her to follow the Shari'ah and to abandon obedience to Satan. For her to remain in the state of mourning is a form of obedience to Satan, and it involves a type of dissatisfaction with the calamity and excessive grief. It is obligatory for her not to do this. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) encouraged patience and seeking reward, just as Allah encouraged it in His great Book. He said: [al-Baqarah:157] Allah (Exalted and Majestic is He) said: [al-Taghabun:11] Some of the Salaf said: "He" means the man, or its meaning is that the woman is struck by a calamity, so she knows that it is from Allah, and she is pleased and submits.
So it is obligatory for her to be patient and seek reward, and to change her state. She should wear beautiful clothes, apply kohl to her eyes, use perfume, go out to her good neighbors and relatives, visit those whose visitation is good, and abandon this bad matter, which is obedience to Satan and a display of excessive grief and dissatisfaction. This is not permissible. So you must advise her, guide her to good, and tell her this speech that you have heard. Tell her this speech, or record it and read it to her. Record this speech and read it to her, so that she may benefit and so that she may distance herself from obedience to Satan. May Allah guide us and her to His straight path.
This is a question from Umm Khalid, from Tarif in the Northern Region. She says: My father passed away about two years ago, but the problem is with his wife, who is my mother. Her grief over him has continued, perhaps until this very moment, which has led her to refuse to change her black clothing or to adorn herself in any way, not even by applying kohl to her eyes or henna. We have done everything we can to convince her to abandon this mournful appearance, but to no avail. We ask you to clarify what is prescribed in this matter.
May Allah reward you with the best reward.
Answer:
This is not permissible. It is not permissible for her to remain in her grief or in the clothing of mourning. It is obligatory for her to follow the Shari'ah and to abandon obedience to Satan. For her to remain in the state of mourning is a form of obedience to Satan, and it involves a type of dissatisfaction with the calamity and excessive grief. It is obligatory for her not to do this. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) encouraged patience and seeking reward, just as Allah encouraged it in His great Book. He said:
but give good tidings to the patient, (156) Who, when disaster strikes them, say, "Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we will return." (157) Those are the ones upon whom are blessings from their Lord and mercy. And it is those who are the [rightly] guided.
وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ الَّذِينَ إِذَا أَصَابَتْهُمْ مُصِيبَةٌ قَالُوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ أُوْلَئِكَ عَلَيْهِمْ صَلَوَاتٌ مِنْ رَبِّهِمْ وَرَحْمَةٌ وَأُوْلَئِكَ هُمُ الْمُهْتَدُونَNo disaster strikes except by permission of Allah. And whoever believes in Allah - He will guide his heart
مَا أَصَابَ مِنْ مُصِيبَةٍ إِلَّا بِإِذْنِ اللَّهِ وَمَنْ يُؤْمِنْ بِاللَّهِ يَهْدِ قَلْبَهُSo it is obligatory for her to be patient and seek reward, and to change her state. She should wear beautiful clothes, apply kohl to her eyes, use perfume, go out to her good neighbors and relatives, visit those whose visitation is good, and abandon this bad matter, which is obedience to Satan and a display of excessive grief and dissatisfaction. This is not permissible. So you must advise her, guide her to good, and tell her this speech that you have heard. Tell her this speech, or record it and read it to her. Record this speech and read it to her, so that she may benefit and so that she may distance herself from obedience to Satan. May Allah guide us and her to His straight path.
Source
binbaz.org.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.