The Ruling on Breastfeeding When the Number of Feedings Is Unknown
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Question:
A letter reached the program from one of the female listeners, saying: Umm Muhammad bint Ma'ari—apparently—our sister is asking and saying: I breastfed my husband's nephew after I had asked my husband for permission, driven by the insistence of his mother and father; because she could not manage it and the child was crying from hunger, so I breastfed him. But now I have forgotten how many times I breastfed him. Yes, Your Eminence, I am certain that I breastfed him, but did he become full? Did I breastfeed him one day or more? All these questions are troubling me, and I am looking for an answer. This child, who is now a young man, sits with me and considers me his mother, and he sits with my sons and daughters, and no one suspects that he is no longer their brother except me. So fear keeps me awake, and I am unable to confront him, as he has spent this time with us as if he were our son. So what should I do?
Answer:
It is obligatory for the believer to fear Allah , and likewise for the believing woman, in breastfeeding and other matters. If you do not know the number of breastfeedings, then he is not your son, and he does not become a mahram (a relative one may not marry) to you or your daughters until you know that he was breastfed five times or more. As for the fact that he was breastfed because he was crying or because he needed it, that is not sufficient; he may have been breastfed once and been satisfied with that, or twice, or three times. Therefore, the controlled breastfeeding of five times or more is required, whether in one day or over several days; due to the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) to Sahlah bint Sahl:, and when it was established from 'A'ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) that she said: Sahih Muslim 1452a, and in another wording: Bulugh al-Maram 8:195, narrated by Muslim in the Sahih.
And due to his saying (peace and blessings be upon him):, so it is known thereby that one feeding or two feedings, and likewise three and four, do not result in prohibition. Rather, it is necessary that there be five certain feedings within the two years. So if you do not know that, and you have doubt about it, then consider him not a mahram, neither to you nor to your daughters. And his marrying one of them involves a shubhah (doubtful matter), so he should not marry any of them, in order to avoid suspicion; due to his saying (peace and blessings be upon him): Sunan an-Nasa'i 5711Sahih (Darussalam), Bulugh al-Maram 16:32. We ask Allah for success and guidance for everyone. Yes.
A letter reached the program from one of the female listeners, saying: Umm Muhammad bint Ma'ari—apparently—our sister is asking and saying: I breastfed my husband's nephew after I had asked my husband for permission, driven by the insistence of his mother and father; because she could not manage it and the child was crying from hunger, so I breastfed him. But now I have forgotten how many times I breastfed him. Yes, Your Eminence, I am certain that I breastfed him, but did he become full? Did I breastfeed him one day or more? All these questions are troubling me, and I am looking for an answer. This child, who is now a young man, sits with me and considers me his mother, and he sits with my sons and daughters, and no one suspects that he is no longer their brother except me. So fear keeps me awake, and I am unable to confront him, as he has spent this time with us as if he were our son. So what should I do?
Answer:
It is obligatory for the believer to fear Allah , and likewise for the believing woman, in breastfeeding and other matters. If you do not know the number of breastfeedings, then he is not your son, and he does not become a mahram (a relative one may not marry) to you or your daughters until you know that he was breastfed five times or more. As for the fact that he was breastfed because he was crying or because he needed it, that is not sufficient; he may have been breastfed once and been satisfied with that, or twice, or three times. Therefore, the controlled breastfeeding of five times or more is required, whether in one day or over several days; due to the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) to Sahlah bint Sahl:
Breastfeed Salim five feedings and you will be forbidden to him
أرضعي سالمًا خمس رضعات تحرمي عليهit had been revealed in the Holy Qur'an that ten clear sucklings make the marriage unlawful, then it was abrogated (and substituted) by five sucklings and Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) died and it was before that time (found) in the Holy Qur'an (and recited by the Muslims).
كان فيما أنزل من القرآن عشر رضعات معلومات يحرمن، ثم نسخن بخمس معلومات فتوفي النبي ﷺ والأمر على ذلكthese words were among what was recited in the Qur'an
وهي فيما يقرأ من القرآنAnd due to his saying (peace and blessings be upon him):
One feeding or two feedings do not prohibit [marriage].
لا تحرم الرضاعة ولا الرضعتانLeave that which makes you doubt for that which does not make you doubt.
دع ما يريبك إلى ما لا يريبكSo he, who saves himself from these doubtful things, saves his religion and his honor
من اتقى الشبهات فقد استبرأ لدينه وعرضه
Source
binbaz.org.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.