Encouraging the Avoidance of Exaggeration in Matters of Marriage

A message was received by the program from one of the brothers, identified as (A. A. A). Our brother complains to Your Eminence, the Shaykh, about wedding venues and the excessive spending on them, especially since many people have made it a custom to stipulate that the wedding of their daughter must be held in a specific venue, which places a heavy burden on the groom. He seeks guidance on this matter.
Answer: There is no doubt that the Sunnah is to avoid exaggeration in bridal gifts and wedding feasts in order to facilitate the marriage of young men and women. The families of both the husband and the wife should avoid exaggeration in these matters. They should advise one another to refrain from such excess and also to keep bridal gifts modest, in order to encourage young men to marry and to ensure that young women are married off and do not remain unmarried in their homes. Similarly, holding weddings in large venues can sometimes place a heavy burden on the husband or the wife's family. Likewise, having many feasts and expanding the scale of the wedding feast also makes things difficult for them.
Therefore, what is prescribed for everyone is to avoid exaggeration, whether for the husband's family or the wife's family. What is prescribed for everyone is to avoid exaggeration. . A believer should not exaggerate in these matters, but rather follow the Sunnah. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to 'Abd al-Rahman ibn 'Awf: . And the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) held a wedding feast for Zaynab with bread and meat, and he invited people to the feast, so everyone who entered ate.
The point is that the general practice of wedding feasts is prescribed in marriage, but Muslims should avoid exaggeration in this by having too many feasts or preparing excessive amounts of food that may end up being thrown into garbage bags or places that food should be kept pure from and kept away from. Instead, it should be sent to the poor and those in need.
The point is that having many feasts leads to this outcome: food and meat being thrown into garbage or places that are undesirable, while the poor are in need of this money and food. The need to dispose of it in the trash arises because some people are unaware of the poor or are unable to reach them.
In conclusion, being lenient and avoiding exaggeration is what is required for both the husband's and the wife's families. However, if there is a need to hold the wedding in a venue because they do not have a house where they can marry, the matter is broad in this regard. But one should not exaggerate; the venue should be inexpensive. They should seek a place that is light in cost so that there is no exaggeration. If they are content with their venue and do not exaggerate by inviting many people, the matter is broader and better. Praise be to Allah.
The important thing is to announce the marriage. If they announce it, even with just one sheep or two sheep in their homes, and invite some people whom they value and wish to invite to their places and homes, without exaggerating, this is more complete and better. This ensures that there is no hardship for anyone and that young women and young men do not remain unmarried. We ask Allah for guidance and success for everyone.
The presenter: May Allah reward you.