I have a stepdaughter who grew up among my children, and her mother is with us. She is now ten years old. Is it possible for my second wife to breastfeed her so that she becomes a sister to my children?
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The questioner : In a case like this, we can say that if the stepdaughter grew up in the house, and this girl grew up young, knowing herself only among these children, considering herself one of them, and then she grew up and reached the age of menstruation, or before she reached the age of menstruation, if the man’s wife breastfed her, we can include her under this rule of dire necessity, that the children will enter or something like that?
The Shaykh : This is not the methodology of the Salaf. When a situation occurs, you ask.
The questioner : Reality.
The Shaykh : You say reality, ... and we answer to the extent of the reality.
The questioner : Now, I have a stepdaughter, and you know that this is a reality. I have a stepdaughter, her mother is with me, and my other wife is present. When she came as a small child, she was breastfeeding. I prevented my wife from breastfeeding her, but now I say: if I had known then what I know now, I would have ordered her to breastfeed her at that time.
The Shaykh : Why did you prevent the wife from breastfeeding her?
The questioner : We said, perhaps she will grow up and we will marry her to one of the sons.
The Shaykh : Do you see how, when the story is told, the fatwa might change?
The questioner : But now.
The Shaykh : Now.
The questioner : The circumstances have changed.
The Shaykh :"The sword precedes the blame".
The questioner : Yes, now, for example, I have a young man who has reached the age of seventeen, and the girl is ten years old. And I have started, for example, to feel uncomfortable, and it may become difficult for the boy to move around the house, that this girl has reached the age of discernment.
Another questioner: Her husband is from him.
The questioner : She is now below this age, so there is nothing, for example, of this kind.
The Shaykh : Your answer is wrong. What does "below this age" mean?
The questioner : I mean this matter is not applicable. This issue is not with him or with me. He does not have, for example, a desire for her.
The Shaykh : How is it not applicable when it is a Shari'ah ruling by which judgment is made, practiced by everyone, with no disagreement on it? So you prioritize the disputed matter over it?
The questioner : He does not have a desire for her, for example?
The questioner : Give her to my son.
The Shaykh : Marry her to someone else.
The Shaykh : This is not the methodology of the Salaf. When a situation occurs, you ask.
The questioner : Reality.
The Shaykh : You say reality, ... and we answer to the extent of the reality.
The questioner : Now, I have a stepdaughter, and you know that this is a reality. I have a stepdaughter, her mother is with me, and my other wife is present. When she came as a small child, she was breastfeeding. I prevented my wife from breastfeeding her, but now I say: if I had known then what I know now, I would have ordered her to breastfeed her at that time.
The Shaykh : Why did you prevent the wife from breastfeeding her?
The questioner : We said, perhaps she will grow up and we will marry her to one of the sons.
The Shaykh : Do you see how, when the story is told, the fatwa might change?
The questioner : But now.
The Shaykh : Now.
The questioner : The circumstances have changed.
The Shaykh :"The sword precedes the blame".
The questioner : Yes, now, for example, I have a young man who has reached the age of seventeen, and the girl is ten years old. And I have started, for example, to feel uncomfortable, and it may become difficult for the boy to move around the house, that this girl has reached the age of discernment.
Another questioner: Her husband is from him.
The questioner : She is now below this age, so there is nothing, for example, of this kind.
The Shaykh : Your answer is wrong. What does "below this age" mean?
The questioner : I mean this matter is not applicable. This issue is not with him or with me. He does not have, for example, a desire for her.
The Shaykh : How is it not applicable when it is a Shari'ah ruling by which judgment is made, practiced by everyone, with no disagreement on it? So you prioritize the disputed matter over it?
The questioner : He does not have a desire for her, for example?
The questioner : Give her to my son.
The Shaykh : Marry her to someone else.